Hyphenating a childs name?

Two nights ago my fiance and I were having a discussion about our mutual engaged friends. Our female friend has decided to not change her last name at all since it "is too much of a hassle" ... furthermore she wants their children to have a hyphenated name. We both thought that children having a hyphenated name was a little strange. Well, myself more than my fiance. See the kicker is, we're due to have our first child in September, and wouldn't you know, the damndest thing happened.

I get a call at work from my fiance. She just had lunch with her dad. She calls with the strangest request...starting with "Honey please dont get mad," so naturally I go into defensive mode. Her father has asked her to "talk it over with me" about hyphenating not only her name, but our soon to be child's name. My initial reaction was "What! Are you crazy!" considering we just had a conversation about this two days ago. However, things are a little complicated. Her fathers reasoning is that since she is the only child, he feels like that side of the family will be left out without some signifier that they are a part of our family...OK I say...and?
I suppose this was a good enough reason for my fiance because she pulled an executive order on me and it has been decided...so it shall be done...our baby's name will be hyphenated.

So what is everyone take on this? Is it absurd? Not a big deal? In a way, to me, it seems intrusive. He has his family let me have mine. What happens if our child marries someone who wants to keep their last name also? Or is this just another example of male egotism gone awry (on his part I mean...or maybe both)

Please share!

no takers?

Maybe I should have said that my fiance was abducted and that our child is actually a human-alien hybrid!

Run!!! Run as fast as you can!!!

This is grounds to call off the marriage. Hire a lawyer to make sure your child is named properly. Make it part of the child support deal.

I don't see a big deal about having a hyphenated name, but then again I'm a woman. Saying that I'd be happy to take my husbands name, but then again I have the name of my father who was a complete B****** and took all my mums money and fled to Cypress. :bash:etc lol.

I think many people choose to have hyphenated names these days, I've known a few friends like that and apart from having longer names it's not an issue lol.

I wouldn't stress too much about it, at least she's actually taking your name in part. There are pleanty married women these days that keep their old names full stop.

Well I have a hyphenated name.........hmmmmmmmmm, let me think???

Your family, your choice, not his. If your future wife sides with her father more than you, then she isn't the one for you.

Believe it or not, I'm still not sure where half of my hyphenated name comes from!

Tell you something though, anyone growing up should expect a certain amount of joking about a "double-barreller". The phrase "what's in a name" has it's exceptions. I also know that I am the only person in the world with my name which I suppose is nice to know but there is something to be said for simplicity.
I also get the choice of using just the last part of my surname when giving details. This can give some confusion and anonymity where needed.

I can understand her fathers point of view, but like I said it's your coice, not his.

On a sillier note: what if you wanted the same for your child and it ended up with a "triple barrel name". lol.

What's going to happen in a few generations if everyone gives their children hyphenated names?

Soon everyone's last names would be a mile long!

Bad idea.



[edit on 5/8/2007 by djohnsto77]

I kind of wish I'd hyphenated my kids' names, considering I left their loser of a father.

However, try to think about it from the child's perspective. They're going to have to learn to WRITE a long, unwieldy name. It won't be an issue later, when they actually CAN write, but it's going to be a PITA for them when they are just learning.

Why not make up an entirely new last name that's a combination of parts of both your names?

I have a hyphinated last name, and all I can say is dont do it, in a few years I am legaly changing it completely, not keeping either side, but I tend to fill out a lot of papers, and they ask for my full name (which sometimes includes my 2 middles names), I wont givee my full name but this is how long it is.. Samuel M***** P*** B*****-W**********

Its long and annoying.

Thanks for the input. To appease everyone we decided that we'll just hyphenate the name for now and if they want to change it later then we'll do that. Backwards? Yeah but Oh-Well.

Today is the day we find out what we're having! Go go ultrasound!

My names hyphenated and I'm cool with it. I'm only ever known by the first half of it... except to a few of my aunts who always yell "LAWRENCE!" and make me go red in front of my friends.

Still, that's what aunts do. How did the ultrasound go?

Hope the Ultra sound went well!

I'm rather proud of my family name, and would have gone in to orbit! You could insist that your child has the middle name Hyphen or Hyphenator.

Your wife gets her - and you get your Hyphenator, fight fire with fire!!

Then again my boy has several names: his English name; his Chinese name and the nick name my wife's family call him, because they can't say his English name!

But his family name is always the same - end of!