Free at last, free at last, great god almighty I am free at last!

Originally posted by Paresthesia
Wow, I've never heard anyone so excited about a divorce.

If you ever get a divorce (God forbid) you may be just as excited.

This is probably my last week living with my spouse, our break-up has been a long time in coming and there are certainly days when I feel I could throw a party celebrating the break-up.

I am in the same boat you were in What U KNO, I won't have a car once she leaves, and my credited is seriously wrecked besides. How hard was it for you to get wheels again? Any tips for me?

I hope you hear the outcome of your case soon. You and your son have been in my prayers.

Well I was pretty screwed finnancialy when she left, I had to scrimp and save, and eventualy I found a decent car that ran well and could get me around for $600.00

It's not pretty deffenatly not a chick mobile but it's mine outright. I am also in the same boat as you as far as my credit goes. She used to take my check book out and write checks on no money without me knowing about it.

I still havent heard from the judge as far as custody goes. I am getting frustrated with this and I hope I find out soon.

i'm freeeeee now i rejoice with glee yay meeee now i have to pee

What the heck is going on? it's been over two weeks sense the divorce and the judge still hasnt decided on custody.

I don't know whether this is a good thing or a bad thing or not. I am so sick of waiting. There isnt anything I can do about it either cause I don't want to tick the court off by complaining and therefore giving my ex custody cause the judge gets annoyed with me.

GAH. makes me want to write the appeals court or something to complain that the judge is in contempt of his own order. (course that won't go anywhere either) just makes me want to go to the courthouse and go WHAT THE mother er don't you obey your own orders? If you can't obey your own ruling how do you expect anyone else to follow what you say?

This is completely unacceptable to me. I think I have been more thian patient with the judge and I think it's time for him to rule on this so that all of us can get on with our lives.

Originally posted by wellwhatnow

I am in the same boat you were in What U KNO, I won't have a car once she leaves, and my credited is seriously wrecked besides. How hard was it for you to get wheels again? Any tips for me?

It's not real hard to get a car with bad credit, but be prepared to pay high interest. Depending on your credit score you could end up paying 15-20% on a car loan.

Usually as long as you have a job you can get a car. At least here in Ohio.

I filed bankruptcy after my divorce, best move I ever made. Once I went to court and it was discharged, I bought a brand new car with no money down. Now 8 years later, 2-3 new cars, purchased a home, doing okay.

Best wishes for you... keep your head up.

I'm free too!!!!

Here's a little celebration banana:



My spouse left today. It is over now.

I am sorry to hear that it is taking so long for your case What U KNO. I was hoping to see some good news when I opened this thread today.

You are still in my thoughts.

Thanks for the advice and encouragement elevatedone.

wellwhatnow So she just left? is this just the first part of the divorce? or have you already gotten paperwork done? Do you have a lawyer?

Man that sucks, i can't believe the judge hasn't told you anything yet.:shk:

We are a lesbian couple, so there is no paperwork to do, no lawyer to hire.

She left and we are through. "Our" son is actually my son, so I don't have the problem of custody. He simply stays with me - end of story.

It's too bad that you don't have the same luxury. I'll keep you in my prayers until your son is safe with you.

wellwhatnow Just a split, no fuss no muss, well you lucked out that way I suppose. (actualy I thought you were a guy shows What I KNO ) but at least it makes it easier. How is your son in all of this? Was he attached to her? I just think that being a parent isnt always just the biological connection but the emotional connection is just as important if not more so.

Thanks for thinking about me. Ill keep everyone updated as far as this goes.

Originally posted by whatukno
... the emotional connection is just as important if not more so.

I always said that, too. I always said that "parent" is a verb. It's what you do in the child's life that matters, not the act of giving birth. Any bitch can give birth, but it takes something remarkable to parent a child.

As for my son's reaction? He is so glad she's gone. All he ever learned from her was anger anyway.

May both of our kids make full emotional recoveries and find their peace in this world.

Is there any news regarding the ruling yet?

Your thread was a bit like a novel...as I read through I was hoping to read the outcome and I am not even involved and I want to read the outcome!

All the best with it and I hope you hear something soon.

I have a question though relating to the happiness that everyone is demonstrating in the responses.

How can you all be so happy that your single?

I left my husband 9 years ago and I wasnt happy at all to have to do that. I had a three month ship in the night lol which was good fun but nothing serious. I then focused on my kids and study and then after 7 years thought I was ready to get into another relationship. Then he died so that sorted that one. Its been nearly 9 years and still single.

I guess my advice to everyone is enjoy some time on your own but be careful cos before you know it, years have whooshed by and then you look back and go, how the lorry did that happen? Where did the years go?

I don't enjoy being single, I certainly don't like the fact that my marriage ended. Yanno, I didnt get married to get a divorce!

Either way, its great your all in a good place, wish I could feel like that though!

peace

Ugg I am still waiting, STILL WAITING, now going on three weeks since the divorce.

See I know where you are coming from, I expect that I probably won't ever date again. Least I don't expect to date ever again. I too got married to be married and when she left it was a hit below the belt as far as I was concerned.

Originally posted by whatukno
I expect that I probably won't ever date again. Least I don't expect to date ever again. I too got married to be married and when she left it was a hit below the belt as far as I was concerned.

Whatever you do, don't think like that. You have to get out there and date, have fun. Your life will fly by and you will just be miserable. When I write nine years, I think wow, can't believe it. My Mum rang me for my birthday (I left him on my birthday so every year its like, hmm another year) I said to her, 'I feel a bit like a recluse/spinster' and she said 'well, Nat you are!!!' lol

People aren't meant to be alone. It isn't healthy to isolate yourself. Take it from me... nine years still going strong. And after that amount of time, it becomes very hard to change your mindset. I am so independent now and I think that would be a negative in a relationship. So, get out there and date, have a ship in the night...

the old saying, if you fall off a horse, get right back on!!

Well, I can see where you are coming from NJE, but my relationship was actually an abusive one - check out my blog if you want to really know why I am so darned happy - I don't wanna derail this thread with my issues.

I may have a relationship again one day, but only if I can be sure that I have worked out my baggage and won't find myself in another abusive relationship.


So, What U KNO - still no word huh? Has anyone given you any indication of what is going on? Have you considered making some phone calls and simply expressing your frustration that your son is still in the clutches of an unhealthy parent?

Originally posted by wellwhatnow
So, What U KNO - still no word huh? Has anyone given you any indication of what is going on? Have you considered making some phone calls and simply expressing your frustration that your son is still in the clutches of an unhealthy parent?

Yes I have called. They still say that no decision has been made in this case and that they will mail out the decision when they make one.

I am getting quite frustrated with how this is going. They said it was only going to take a week and here we are nearly 3 weeks latter and nothing.

I just sent them the following Email to try and get this going I don't know if it will help or hurt...


To whom it may concern.

The judge in this case had told us that it was going
to take a week to come to a decision in regards to
custody and everything else in this case.

That was on February 27th 2007 it is now March 19th
2007 it has been three weeks since the court date and
when the judge passed down his time period for
decision in this case.

I am becoming frustrated in the lack of progress in
ending this case. We were told one week not three
weeks or longer.

I would like for a fair decision to be made in regards
to this case and I will request that any court order
be sent to this Email Address immediately for my
review.

[edit on 3/19/2007 by whatukno]

I lost.

Oh dear. How can this happen? Did they give you a reason?

What are you going to do now?

Theres nothing I can do now, I lost the case. There is no hope for me anymore. I have lost what is the most important person in my life. I don't know what I am going to do. I don't know if I can go on anymore. I'm only allowed to see my son a grand total of 5 days a month.

There is no justice, I have lost all hope.

Whatukno, I don't know what to say, man that sucks.

So you only get to see you kid 5 days a month, that's barely anything.

Can't the judge make a compromise so your kid can visit you at least a couple more days?

Whatukno, don't get too depressed, try to think positive.