posted on May, 16 2006 @ 03:45 AM
I like to think I am a pretty honest person (not trying to boast or anything). I've always found it quite difficult to come up with some big,
elaborate lie to get me out of a jam, and usually the truth ends up coming out, anyway. Not that I haven't been guilty of doing it, mind you,
everyone does it, it just seems that lying has that snowball effect where when the truth does finally come out, the consiquences are a hundred times
worse than if you had told the truth in the first place.
When I do find myself telling a lie, it's usually to avoid hurting someone's feelings or to avoid conflict. Like, when a friend comes by with a
really bad haircut and they think it's the greatest thing since sliced bread, and she asks me what I think of it, I'm probably going to lie and say
it looks great. If I told her the truth, no matter how sugar-coated it might be, she's going to resent me for it, feel bad and at worst, walk around
feeling self-conscious until she can afford to fix it or let it grow out. There's just no sense in that, for me anyway.
About the avoiding conflict: I have several groups of friends (even family) that just cannot get along and absolutely hate each other, for whatever
reason. Needless to say, there's a lot of trash-talking and "what did she say about me THIS time?" things going on. I'd rather lie and say "Oh
she hasn't brought you up in forever!" rather than, "well, I heard her say...". I think in an instance like that, it's probably for the better to
lie than cause more animosity between the two and possibly bring up trust issues they have with me for taking one's side over the other or not
defending them.
I'm not saying this is necessarily the right thing to do. I once had a nun in high school who argued to death to the class that it's NEVER ok to
lie, no matter what the circumstance. Maybe she was right, but I just feel sometimes I'd rather make someone feel better about themself than be
completely honest.