Amusing Headlines

Anyone got any funny newspaper headlines either done on purpose or accidentally that they remember?

The Mirror newspaper in the UK printed a picture of Pedro Diniz in his F1 Benetton when it caught fire during re-fuelling, with the headline "Diniz in the Oven".

I think the Sun newspaper also printed the picture with a headline that twisted the then Benetton TV ads (the united colours of Benetton) and changed it to "The Ignited Colours of Benetton"

Others I've seen on the web, but can't say for sure if they are true or not include:

Iraqi Head Seeks Arms

Prostitutes appeal to Pope

Blind woman gets new kidney from dad she hasn't seen in years

Aircraft flying too close to ground, crash investigators told... (no s**t)

i heared this one...

After a man escaped from a mental asylum, raping the washing lady as he fled, the news papers headline read: NUT SCREWS WASHER AND BOLTS

ROFL.......'Nut screw washer and bolts' - brilliant!!

I heard a similar one a few years ago (probably an urban myth, but funny nonetheless)

It was a guy with mental health problems who had been locked up in a secure mental hospital. He was apparently convinced he could communicate with 'the dead'. The other thing about him was that he was a midget..... He escaped and the headline read:

(drumroll)

Small Medium at Large.....

LOL
that is funny indead. it does sound like an urban myth though

Here's some more for your enjoyment!

Grandmother of eight makes hole in one

Deaf mute gets new hearing in killing

Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers

House passes gas tax onto senate

Two convicts evade noose, jury hung

William Kelly was fed secretary

Milk drinkers are turning to powder

Safety experts say school bus passengers should be belted

Queen Mary having bottom scraped

Is there a ring of debris around Uranus?

Panda mating fails - veterinarian takes over

NJ judge to rule on nude beach

Child's stool great for use in garden

Dr. Ruth to talk about sex with newspaper editors

Soviet virgin lands short of goal again

Squad helps dog bite victim

Dealers will hear car talk at noon

Enraged cow injures farmer with ax

Lawmen from Mexico barbecue guests

Miners refuse to work after death

Two Soviet ships collide - one dies

Two sisters reunite after eighteen years at checkout counter

Never withhold herpes from loved one

Nicaragua sets goal to wipe out literacy

Drunk drivers paid $1,000 in 1984

Autos killing 110 a day, let's resolve to do better

If strike isn't settled quickly it may last a while

Smokers are productive, but death cuts efficiency

Something went wrong in jet crash, experts say

lmao and then rofl some more, i loved the nut and bolt, the farmer injured by the cow(if u palay the pc game diablo2; u know what it means) and the ring around Uranus...