Love is Pain

I feel better by just writing this down...

Seeing her rips through me like a swift blade. I wish I could get her out of my mind. We broke up for good and sincere reasons. But her image haunts my memory and my dreams. I miss her when I am alone...I miss her when I'm down, but being near her angers me and I despise her. The good memories make me want her, but her presence is repulsive to me.

We work together at a store, and are basically forced near each other. Now it seems as another reality...where once we got along, now she seems a stranger. This is the way it has to be.

All the things we did together, all the secrets shared, all the things that were said were done in vain. I feel as though a part of me has been stolen. Taken from me, but given to her by my blinded faith. All the time and effort put into this seems to be wasted life.

I'm wondering when all the times we said we loved each other, if they were true. What is true love? I don't know. Something feels like it has been ripped away from me. The line between love and pain is so narrow, and it seems you stand on each side of the line at the same time.

Can you love someone so much that it seems painful at times? Love brings pain, and when that love ends, all that remains is that pain.

I will move on, but I am wary of another relationship. I'm young still, but I wonder if it is worth it. Maybe some people are meant to be alone? Maybe I am out of place, and this is just the thoughts of an unexperienced person not accustomed to relationships. But the lingering presence of confusion still clouds my mind. Is the inevitable pain worth the uncertainty of another failed relationship?

Can I try to build a healthy relationship when I feel doomed from the beginning? I just don't know...

Nobody is ment to be alone Im not going to go into the reasons why some people are alone there are to many and they vary from person to person.

People live for the highs in life weather it be love or some other aspect of there life. With the highs you have to have the lows its just like climbing a hill at some point you have to come down.

When you find the right person you will spend most or your whole life at the top of the hill.

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

Originally posted by malmsteen
Can I try to build a healthy relationship when I feel doomed from the beginning? I just don't know...

My opinion is that it may not be impossible to do, but might as well be.

Speaking as someone who has learned the hard way, my advice is to avoid looking to others for happiness and fulfillment.

True happiness is being happy with what you have.

Once you have made peace with yourself and uncovered the dazzling beauty that resides within your heart (I recommend meditation for this), only then can you share it with others.

And when you do that, I am confident that you will be pleased with the results.

There is no need for despair when love not only surrounds you, but radiates from within to everyone who loves you.

Well, that's my opinion, anyway.

Your mileage may vary.

Love is not painful, co-dependancy is painful.

yes...love can be painfull.....for example:-




look at her sitting there.......she knows you want her.....she tempts you with her sleek, heavenley curves........spinning gentley and provactivley on the display stand.......but is she destined for another?.....only time will tell.

There is something to be learned from everything we experience in life, and love is definitely the cruelest teacher. My boyfriend wrote something a while before we were together, while going thru the same thing you are now. He posted it on ATS a while ago and you can read it here. It is very well written and insightful.

As cliche as the old saying is, it really is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all.

Try to keep in mind that just because you were hurt by this girl, doesn't mean all girls will hurt you. If you want to have a healthy relationship in the future, let go of the past before you start up a new relationship.

Good luck!

Love is not painfull, the memories from the love you shared with a significant other is. From your post I can only assume their can be no recourse and the two of you have separated indeffinately. I believe the pain you feel is not from the seperation but the from your inability to fix your relationship. You need to forgive yourself and move on.

My advice for any future relationships, be very judicious with the phrase "i love you". And be very honest with your partner.

snoop what do you say about dating coworkers???


oh yeah what came first the chicken or the egg???

Originally posted by Laughing Man


oh yeah what came first the chicken or the egg???

The lizzard that layed the egg that hatched the chicken.

In all seriousness, the feelings that your having will pass with time. There's nothing wrong with you. They are normal. Every day will be easier. From your posts, I can tell that you have a heart. You will find that special lady. She will see that passion, and fall head over heels. Don't change. You'll be fine.

Life itself is often pain. Often this is how we learn by pain. Mind you we want to reduce our vulnurability to this pain but in life we suffer pain.

It is a good idea not to date where you work to reduce the vulnurability. You dont want to complicate the ability of yourself to get a long with your coworkers by failed relationship baggage that the two of you may be carrying over to the job. This would not be good. This is also why it is not good to date where you work. Some people can handle it some cannnot but if it goes bad it can get complicated with your coworkers as well as the two of you ...this is not good in the workplace. Hence dont date where you work. To put it another way ..dont squat where you eat. Pardon the crudity.

As one of the other posters put it ..your still young. Life is learning and often learning can be painful and uncomfortable. Learn from this. Keep going. There are lots of women out there. Learn to reduce your vulnurability..but learn nonetheless but dont be a quitter.

Thanks,
Orangetom

Originally posted by malmsteen
Love is Pain

I could not agree with you more.

It takes time. Simple as that. Do what you feel is natural and close the door to her. If you really don't want to try and try again persistence is key. I mean if she can't accept you for who you are (don't take advice ffrom other guys at work either!) then she doesn't love you. Love is about acceptance and forgiveness. If she comes back to you she loves you. If this sounds confusing it's because it's as confusing as you wish. It relates much to my favourite saying i made up when i was homeless and in love. Reality is what you make it, because your view is how you see reality and nobody makes you think except yourself.