Flyingspaghettimonsterism: creationism in all it's splendor

Join the first church of the flying spaghetti monster


may you be touched by his noodly appendage


[edit on 11-8-2005 by Hvitserk]

I’m sure you now realize how important it is that your students are taught this alternate theory. It is absolutely imperative that they realize that observable evidence is at the discretion of a Flying Spaghetti Monster. Furthermore, it is disrespectful to teach our beliefs without wearing His chosen outfit, which of course is full pirate regalia. I cannot stress the importance of this, and unfortunately cannot describe in detail why this must be done as I fear this letter is already becoming too long. The concise explanation is that He becomes angry if we don’t.

You may be interested to know that global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of Pirates since the 1800s. For your interest, I have included a graph of the approximate number of pirates versus the average global temperature over the last 200 years. As you can see, there is a statistically significant inverse relationship between pirates and global temperature.

He's right.

And this is very effective protest.

Response from Mrs. Janet Waugh - District 1 - Received 6/25/05

From: JWaugh1052@[redacted]
To: [email protected]
Date: Jun 25, 2005 6:34 AM
Subject: Response from a member of the Kansas Board of Education

Thanks for your comments about the Flying Spaghetti Monster and all the supporters who have sent their support to members of the Kansas Board of Education. I am supporting the recommendations of the science committee and am currently in the minority. I think your theory is wonderful and possibly some of the majority members will be willing to support it.
Thanks again,

Janet Waugh
District 1

Response from Mrs. Sue Gamble - District 2 - Received 6/26/05

From: msgamble@[redacted]
To: [email protected]
Date: Jun 26, 2005 6:34 PM
Subject: Reply

Dear Mr. Henderson, Thanks for your message. Thanks for the laugh. Your web site is fascinating. I will add your theory to a long list of alternative theories I intend to introduce when it is appropriate. I am practicing how to do this with a straight face which is difficult since it's such a ridiculous subject; it is also very sad that we are even having the discussion.

I will be one of the four member minority who will be voting against the flawed science standards currently being proposed by the six member majority.

Sincerely, Sue Gamble

.
I perform the ritual of the noodles on a regular basis.

Service is usually held in the Dinning room or Kitchen.

I too have come to see the power of the noodles.

All Hail the the flyingspaghettimonster.

Beware you non-believers, you will not see another meatball for the rest of eternity or smell the luscious garlic fragrance.
.

I WANT to believe...

www.venganza.org...

WHY YOU SHOULD CONVERT TO FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTERISM

* Flimsy moral standards.
* Every friday is a relgious holiday. If your work/school objects to that, demand your religious beliefs are respected and threaten to call the ACLU.
* Our heaven is WAY better. We've got a Stripper Factory AND a Beer Volcano.

"Touched by his noodly appendage..."

This stuff is truly priceless, and it illustrates the point succinctly I think.

WHAT THE EXPERTS ARE SAYING

"As a scientist, I'd like to say that the currently accepted scientific theory is evolution. But, some competing ideas have been proposed, such as ID and FSMism, and discussion to include one should include the other, as these ideas are equally valid."
-- Mark Zurbuchen, Ph.D.

"As a medical practitioner and scientist, I wholeheartedly believe that every theory and hypothesis needs full consideration and explanation with formal ratification by peer review. We have a duty to inform our schools and presumably pasta should form a staple part of our educational diet."
-- Dr. A. Macintyre (UK)

"Letting the religious right teach ID in schools is like letting the Marines teach poetry in advanced combat training. As a scientist, I see these the relevancy between the two sets to be equal. If Kansas is going to mess up like this, the least it can do is not be hypocritical and allow equal time for other alternative "theories" like FSMism, which is by far the tastier choice."
-- J. Simon, PhD

"One of the hardest things to do as a scientist is to put my personal beliefs aside when discussing matters of science. So as a professional, I have to say that both forms of Intelligent Design - ID and ID-FSM are equally valid and if intelligent design is taught in schools, equal time should be given to the FSM theory and the non-FSM theory. But, speaking personally now, it seems to me the FSM theory is MUCH more plausable than the non-FSM ID theory, because it is the only one of the two that takes into account all the discrepancies between ID and measureable objective reality."
-- Professor Douglas Shaw, Ph.D

"In discussing competing theories, if one is to present ID then it is only fair and logical to teach other theories with commensurate evidence. Based on Mr. Henderson's letter, it is clear that the FSM theory has evidence comparable in weight to ID. As a scientist and professor, it is often difficult to present differing opinions in an unbiased way. However, it is important to the student to be exposed to these ideas to form their own opinions. This comes right out of the handbook of the ID purporters: present the different "theories" and let the listener decide. If those in favor of ID are so convinced, then they should not be concerned that the presentation of the FSM theory would serve to undermine the credibility of ID. "
-- Elizabeth Garrett-Mayer, PhD

"At one time, I believed as the Aztecs did, that the universe was created by two gods, Quetzalcoatl and Tezcatlipoca who attacked and ripped apart Hungry Woman to create the universe. Then I believed, as the Moriori do, that the universe was created when Papa and her husband Rangi hugged and bore children, and were subsequently separated by their son Tane who let light shine between them. However, my views have been swayed by the substantial evidence that the earth and universe was actually created relatively recently by the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM). I am firmly convinced that the evidence supporting this depiction of the origins of life, the universe, and everything has many of the trappings of science, and I therefore support the inclusion of FSM creation evidence in the Kansas science curriculum and standards."
-- Sebastian Wren, Ph.D

Wiki: Flying Spaghetti Monsterism

At 2.6 million hits to date and an estimated 200,000 converts a day, this is indeed the fastest growing Religion in North America and should be considered on equal footing with ID.

Have you accepted the Flying Spaghetti Monster as your personal Savior yet?

jokes aside i must say that this whole thing does raise concern in europe

it all adds to the already tarnished view of the US and isolates them even more , which is really not necessary , i suppose the christian fundemantelists do not really care about that but well .... look in your history books and you'll see extremes never brought much good

i believe 800 years obscurantism were enough time to look forward and not back

may our heads be covered with His holy sauce

i have a hard time takeing some thing called the Flying Spaghetti Monster seriously..
although i can see why he wants to tuch everything with his noodly appendage..

[edit on 15pmu22007 by DaleGribble]

good Idea, I've forgotten to correctly worship the noodly flying spaghetti monster. I better do some of that after work.

As the resident Pirate of Skepticism on the board, I might point out that the true name of the religion is Pastafarianism.

All hail the Noodly Appendage.

RAmen.

Originally posted by MajorMalfunction
As the resident Pirate of Skepticism on the board, I might point out that the true name of the religion is Pastafarianism.

All hail the Noodly Appendage.

RAmen.

reply to post by MajorMalfunction


I didnt even know this was getting to a mainstream belife/joke/gag.

As my friend Jeff always use to tell to All hail the Noodly Appendage!

I thought he was just being silly and making a point!!!

Point well taken, and made!! Man I miss Jeff, if he was still around on this earth today he would have really gotten a kick out of this thread!!!

Pastafarianism is absolutely brilliant. It takes on the absurdity of creationism without even breaking a sweat.

For example: It's not "gravity", it's "intentional falling".

May you be touched by His noodly appendage.

Peace be upon him, his marvelous meatballs, all hail his mighty noodle and his delectable sauce.
May he shoot tomato sauce laden with Louisiana hot sauce into the eyes of the non-believers, for they do not see anyway,
And may their mouth's be stuffed with his deliciousness, with extra parmesan cheese, so they may not speak of evil.
For it is the way of the Ladle, may his noodly appendage touch you, and drench you in his deliciousness.
Al hail The Fl-ing Spagh-tti M-nster.

rAmen.

reply to post by Toadmund


I eat your God for dinner. Mine sees you while you're in the bathroom.

[edit on 18-9-2007 by depth om]

reply to post by depth om


that is called "taking communion"
the FSM loves you for it.

and our god sees you there too...
he's also the one holding you to the ground with his noodley appendages
so when you're on the toilet, our god is holding you down