One Third of Married Couples Sleep in Separate Bedrooms

This was interesting. Polling indicates 1/3 of married couples eventually opt for separate bedrooms in order to get a good nights sleep. I'm thinking there is a stigma attached and that people don't admit to this very readily. My parents did this. So did my in-laws. Both were married for over 50 years. From my observations, separate bedrooms don't lead to divorce ... they just lead to a good nights sleep.


One Third of Married Couples Sleep in Separate Bedrooms

More than one-third of Americans have filed for a sleep divorce, according to a survey from the American Academy of Sleep Medicine (AASM) of more than 2,000 adults.

Many couples struggle to get a good night’s sleep together fumbling with earplugs, eye masks, silent alarms and different bedtimes, before eventually opting for separate bedrooms.

“We know that poor sleep can worsen your mood, and those who are sleep deprived are more likely to argue with their partners,” Dr. Seema Khosla, a pulmonologist and spokesperson for the AASM, said in a statement.

“Getting a good night’s sleep is important for both health and happiness, so it’s no surprise that some couples choose to sleep apart for their overall well-being,” she added.

a reply to: FlyersFan

My wife and I are the opposite.
We don't sleep well when we are separated.😎

a reply to: FlyersFan

I simply could not do it.

I enjoy cuddling up to the Mrs at night too much.

Then again it is Scotland so it does save on the heating bills.

Plus whats a relationship if you are not sleeping in the same bed?

Guess I'm just old-fashioned.

a reply to: andy06shake

My wife has this joke she tells people when she is talking about our relationship...

"We've been together for 30 years and we still like each other"

Yeah, it's a joke but it's true.

Ehh.

My parents now sleep in king single beds in the same room. Seperated beds, not pushed together. Both have sleep Apnea machines. Hell, i have a sleep apnea machine. Quite good. Don’t get a good rest without it. But it comes with a mask and hose. Good sleep is good sleep. Everyone needs it.

My hubby and I have dealt with this from time to time because of our various sensitivities due to our mental conditions.

Sometimes he'll have such a hard time sleeping he will wake up cursing the world and relocate to the couch.

When it first started happening I got worried because growing up if Dad was sleeping on the couch that means a fight was going on between him and my Mom and it took a lot of reassurance from my husband that he wasn't mad at me he just couldn't sleep in the bedroom that night and had to relocate.

I used to panic if I rolled over to snuggle and he wasn't there but that irrational fear of abandonment has passed and I know I can walk I to the next room and find him on his computer safe and sound.

This man is my world and I adore him with every fiber of my being and even though I'd rather be cuddling I understand if he needs his space he needs his space.

If sleeping in separate bedrooms helps married couples get a good nights sleep I'm all for it.

My wife and I have spoken about this, and if we had the resources to relocate to a place with an additional bedroom, we would probably sleep separately.

She’s a morning person, while I’m a night owl. I hate to disrupt her sleep at 2:00 am when I go to bed. Plus, I’m a pretty loud snorer. It’s not uncommon that she’s awake for the day when I wake her up like this, and I feel guilty about it.

Alas, until we can shake some dollars loose or happen upon good fortune in some other way, our living situation won’t change for the foreseeable future.

I sleep in my own room.

She snores like a saw mill.

I enjoy my sleep...

a reply to: whyamIhere

LoL

I can relate to that.

My Mrs snores, but here is the kicker, only when she faces me.

If she turns round to the other side, not a fecking issue or peep.

She claims i snore also through so what's good for the goose and all that jazz.

a reply to: Bluntone

Yeah, when I would have to travel for work, I would have to take sleeping pills with me. I just do not do well in bed by myself; it's lonely as hell. Yes, my wife snores; yes, she occasionally kicks me in her sleep; yes, she gets up 3-4 times a night to pee; I don't care. I do not sleep soundly at all without her next to me.

I understand how some people need to be alone to sleep; it's just not right for me or my wife.

a reply to: FlyersFan

Interesting,
My eldest (still under 10) wants me to sleep in his bed tonight.

I much prefer spending the night with my wife.

Kids have become the unknown.

But even in argument, my wife and I have no issue sharing the bed.

we do right now because my back necessitates me changing position off and on all night, add in a large 5 yr old boy that has vivid dreams now that queen bed that was just right aint cutting it.

Have a quilt each it makes all the difference.

originally posted by: andy06shake
Plus whats a relationship if you are not sleeping in the same bed?

You have conjugal visits and then after the canoodling and snuggling, sleep a good nights sleep separately.

My parents and in-laws both did this. They both were married over 50 years. It seems to work well.

It seems that couples who sleep seperately stay together for longer.
My parents did it and were married for almost 50 years, very loving. My brother and wife, did it and are devoted for 40+
Many others I know in very longterm, good marriages, including my hubs and I. 33 years and counting.

We love each other like mad. Soulmates and everything.
We also go to bed at the start of the night together, then when one of us feels sleepy, I have my own room. We are with each other every day as well.

After all you don't cuddle when you are sleeping, so we don't miss anything good.
What we avoid though is twitching, snoring, space taking, duvet knicking and all that.

When we were young we were always together, but when you get old/er, you need more peace and comfort and good sleep.

I swear some murders happen when people have to listen to another snoring every night whilst they stare at a dark ceiling. 😂

It's not always a sign that you love each other less, but a natural progression for each other's wellbeing.

Yes there is stigma attached, but it comes mostly from young people who aren't there yet.

If their marriage survives long enough, they may/will do the same one day. So why should anyone listen to them?

I could have written this post. My husband has a terrible time getting to sleep. I often fall immediately asleep. And I now snore. I can actually hear myself and wake myself up. And I am an early to bed, early to rise person. I need to be up for my chickens and our puppy. The puppy knows to come to me when he wakes up and needs to go out.

I was so lonely and felt rejected at first. I have adjusted. Once in a while he will come to bed but he does not get the best rest.

He will retire (hopefully) in 5 months and then we can turn his office into another bedroom.

a reply to: GENERAL EYES

a reply to: FlyersFan

Me an Mrs sleep together. I will awaken numberous times during the night. However, if I fall asleep on the couch I will sleep all night for several hours, never awakining.

Shes a thrasher

a reply to: FlyersFan

You have conjugal visits and then after the canoodling and snuggling, sleep a good nights sleep separately.

Its not even really about the sex FlyersFan, its about the cuddles and intimacy(I don't believe i just said that LoL).

I could not be in a relationship and not sleep next to her, or at least i would not wish to be.

Each to their own all the same, and if it works for you and your partner, then don't try and fix it.

My parents and in-laws both did this. They both were married over 50 years. It seems to work well.

The same thing happened with my mum and dad and also with my grandparents as they got older but its not a scenario i would wish to see take place in my own relationship.

Again through just preference.

I find it very difficult to drop off iff my wife is missing. We've slept together for over 50 years but a couple of months ago she fell and broke her elbow, so with the plaster cast and her "spread" I had to sleep in the other room for 3 weeks. Ok, I slept better but I missed the "interactions" that make a couple. She likes a cold bedroom, I like a warm bedroom so we compromise. Yeah, we have a cold room. She likes to torture me when she gets in bed because I'm warm and she puts her cold hands all over me. So I try, notice I said try, to pull her pubic hair. If you can't laugh and enjoy yourself there is no hope for you.

a reply to: FlyersFan

she farts and I snore... I think we deserve our own space at night!