This Joke is Based on a Back in The Day True Story

So back in the day decades ago while in college I was at a bar with my buddy and his 19 year old younger sister tagged along. His sister is Italian, long wavy black hair and she is quite hot. So some guy in the bar walks up to her and says as his very 1st line:

Guy: "boy, I would love to get into your pants"

Gal: " no thanks, one asshole down there is enough!"

The dude walked away in shock, stunned and in disbelief. I saw and heard it all. It was hilarious!

Das all folks!

a reply to: Waterglass

I once heard a guy say "Would you like to go in halves on an embryo?"

It worked, go figure.

a reply to: Waterglass
Damn, this is impossible in Russia. The guy would remain disabled))))

Best I've experienced is good friend walking up to lady in bar ( way out of his league) licking his finger and touching her shoulder. Then says " let's get you out of those wet clothes"

a reply to: Waterglass

About 20 years ago I was hosting a party.
I was sitting somewhat apart just watching and a girl started asking me things. So I told her some stories and poems.

Then she asked me why I was all bearded and shabbily dressed, so I told her why.

She responded by telling me that there was a name for people like me in her language. And she said it.

I assumed that it was an insult, and reacted in rhetorical defense.

Then she grabbed my ass and winked.

I just now got around to looking that word up in her language. It wasn't even an insult.

Joke's on me.

a reply to: TheSpanishArcher

We were in our early 20's and I had another buddy a marine corp officer who was in town for leave and he wasnt a bad looking guy but he coud be quite vulgar. So were out at a pickup bar and he shouts to a pretty girl; "hey bitch you wanna butt F _ _ _ ?

So the babe came over to him and asked him why hes like that as he doesnt have to be. She told him his looks give him enough merit that he didnt have to say things like that.

He was emabrassed and she gave him her phone number.

They dated and did the hot tub thingy. He had to leave as he was going on a six month float.

OOH RA!

a reply to: RussianTroll

I was thinking " Pussy Riot"

a reply to: Waterglass

" Look, I don't want to have a disagreement. Let's go back to my place and get something straight between us".

a reply to: IMeanReally

Sorry dude not into dudes. Just 30 somethings babes. No sweat hogs, tattoo queens or choo choo sorority train girls. Just girls with with OEM ancillary non pharmaceutical enhanced equipment.

Your place. Nah but I can send you a pair of buckets for Christmas. They are large enough so you can use them on barnyard animals