Glorious insults before everything boilded down to a few 4 letter words

This is from an Email:

These glorious insults are from an era " before" the English language got boiled down 4-letter words or "tweets."


"He had delusions of adequacy."
Walter Kerr

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
Winston Churchill

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
Clarence Darrow

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."
Moses Hadas

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
Mark Twain

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."
Oscar Wilde

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one. "
George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one."
Winston Churchill, in response

"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."
Stephen Bishop

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
John Bright

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
Irvin S. Cobb

"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others."
Samuel Johnson

"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."
Charles, Count Talleyrand

"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
Forrest Tucker

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"
Mark Twain

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
Mae West

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."
Oscar Wilde

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination. "
Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

"He has Van Gogh's ear for music."
Billy Wilder

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But I'm afraid this wasn't it."
Groucho Marx

a reply to: 727Sky

Love these! Some of them I've already heard. Others are new to me. Pretty cool stuff.

S&F

a reply to: 727Sky

"I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly"
- Winston Churchill

I'm not saying he's not a tough man. I know he's a tough man. I've seen some of the women he's been out with. - Wahoo McDaniels.

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
John Bright


NICE THANKS

reply to: 727Sky

a reply to: 727Sky





Thanks I needed that laugh , there are some witty comments there my favourite is the one by Faulkner about Ernest Hemingway .

Or as a member here Nonspecific said to me you can compress a volume into one cutting sentence

a reply to: 727Sky

There are some newer ones that are fun too...

"As an outsider, what's your perspective on intelligence?"

“I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you.”

"To think you were the fastest sperm."

"I'd insult you, but I'm afraid you wouldn't notice it."

And my personal favorite because I've used it in chat...

"I apologize for making you feel bad when I called you stupid. In my defense, I thought you knew..."

"eh yo...
ya aint gotta lie to kick it .."

a little modern ghetto but very effective when with a crowd

a reply to: Lumenari

originally posted by: Lumenari
a reply to: 727Sky

There are some newer ones that are fun too...

"As an outsider, what's your perspective on intelligence?"

“I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you.”

"To think you were the fastest sperm."

"I'd insult you, but I'm afraid you wouldn't notice it."

And my personal favorite because I've used it in chat...

"I apologize for making you feel bad when I called you stupid. In my defense, I thought you knew..."

That last one!! I'm going to be using that so often seeing as I work with a load of muppetts! Thanks for the laugh!

"I would agree with you, but then we would both be wrong."

a reply to: 727Sky

That was funny. Insulting people can be an art, especially if done with civility. It can be more painful than more direct and vulgar insults.

Another Churchill;
"He's a modest man, with a lot to be modest about".

a reply to: 727Sky

Those are very witty here's some more.

"Your Instragram makes you seem so fun." (sounds like an insult to me)

"I love how you don't care how you come across." (this can be taken two ways)

"You look so much more awake with makeup." (I thought the tired look for young women was the fad right now ? )

a reply to: 727Sky

This was my Dad's favorite:

"You've got a point, but maybe if you part your hair differently no one will notice."

originally posted by: Lumenari
a reply to: 727Sky

There are some newer ones that are fun too...

"As an outsider, what's your perspective on intelligence?"

“I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you.”

"To think you were the fastest sperm."

"I'd insult you, but I'm afraid you wouldn't notice it."

And my personal favorite because I've used it in chat...

"I apologize for making you feel bad when I called you stupid. In my defense, I thought you knew..."

"As an outsider, what's your perspective on intelligence?"

Oh snap!

when you were born, the doctor slapped your momma.

your the reason sliced cheese has instructions to remove plastic wrapper before consumption.

somebody calls you a mf'er, you say, yes i had sex with your mother, but that's no reason to call me that son.

Whoever told you to be yourself gave you bad advice.

there's not enough crayons to explain it to you.

your teacher said, Your grades say “Marry rich”, but your Beautician said “Try harder”

your as useless as tits on a bore hog.

I just love that you don’t care what people think.

i admire that your going out of your way to not be as ignorant as you usually are today.

a reply to: 727Sky

"You, Sir, are inauthentic ... and wont to copulate with she who bore you"

Known as JAMF these days.

Cheers

Someone you want to avoid give them the nickname 'Pothole', i mean you could precursor it with the F word but i think it gets the job done eloquently enough

a reply to: 727Sky

something about this just made me think of the flyting of Dunbar and Kennedy

the poetic art of public insults

The Flyting of Dunbar and Kennedie



a further look into flyting by Liz Elliot from Aberdeen University