a reply to:
Nostranova
Looks like you had your fair share with crazy.
Can not do it right for such people ever. IDK what expectations they had lol. Either you were too slow or too fast. Or not wanting to help the other
one cheating. Speaks for you that you did not.
But it works the other way around too:
Last year around this time the guy that
used to be my suspension dealer contact, who I also seen and worked with before when I toured different
shops and garages for collecting enough practice time for my engine master class asked me out. I had a good feeling although I knew he maybe a bit too
tame for me but I thought, maybe that's the reason why it never worked with guys.
Guy seemed very down to Earth, polite and smart, also handsome looking. It was lockdown time so we could not go out but hung around in the chillout in
my shop, listened to music, talked and had a good time. I had no intention to hesitate about anything but we came close now and then. I also liked how
he smelled naturally and he said I am funny and attractive and that he likes me a lot.
The first warning sign should have been, when he invited me for dinner and his parents were there. I mean, it was our 5th meeting and first time in
his private space and he brings in his parents. As if we were in a relationship or something. His mother really did not like me because of how I look
(hair color, non-visible tattoos but somehow she knew), also my job. "Not the ways of a fine woman" was one of her comments. His father was more
chilled. He didn't say or had a lot to say but he was nice. I liked his dad. But I think he had no rights at home either.
Was a bit strange, that evening. Fast forward another week as I got sick after the first jab for a few days, he invites me for coffee. We didn't came
close to kissing or anything, not even snuggling before but I started to like him and even had a warm feeling in my stomach and heart. Like something
started emotionally. That was in mid December. We sit there in his kitchen and chat and then my phone notified me I got a new message. I ignored it
but he said it's okay to look. I unlock my phone and see I got new messages on a.. let's call it dating portal for adults (not tinder, different).
At that moment, IDK if he seen the icon or whatever, he starts getting angry. Remember, before the guy was really friendly, soft and not showing any
aggression. He pulls out his phone and shows me a screenshot of my profile there. I am like "and now, where's the problem? We're not in a
relationship, besides I am not active there since we meet". That made him really angry and he accused me of being someone whoring around.
To make clear, I am not whoring around, it's not sex that I search for, on that platform/portal. I have a little daughter and I am not the type to
have intimate relationship with a complete stranger and actually prefer women but anyways. I stood up, shouldered my bag and pocketed the phone and
said it's better I leave now, because I am none of these things. And it's not his business snooping around. He got that from his friend. But I never
saw that friend, so go figure dear reader. It's getting better....
I leave and while I approach my car he shouts from his window how disappointed he is. I had to take a few seconds in the car for myself because I was
really hurt. Just started to open myself up emotionally and then this. During driving, I started to tear up so I stopped at a forest road to collect
myself. Around two minutes later, he comes by (how did he know where I was?) and starts to excuse himself but I just gave him the middle finger. Then
I thought I can outsmart him by waiving him over so he get's out the car, and launched off when I was 2m away, so I can get distance before he is able
to get inside his own car again.
But I had another bad feeling, so I went to my IT guy and got my phone checked. I know this was a mistake, I should have gone to the police, but at
that point I did not know really. Later this would lead to the state attorney not accepting it as evidence. I did not follow through on that but I
really regret not going to the police right away.
The IT guy then setup my telephone in a way he could see everything going in and out. Like TCPdumping a network but for phones. Spyware!!! I have no
idea how he did that but then I am also not paranoid and watching my phone all the time, I generally trust people to a certain level.
This boiled inside me and I had to confront him. Another mistake of mine. I rang his bell and he came down, I wanted to ask him why the # he does
something like that. He starts to approach me and I retreat, but into the wrong direction. Felt comfortable because I am doing WingTsun for years
though. He put his arm on the wall in a way I would not be able to get away. But I tried and then he punched me into the face, directly without
warning. I blackouted for a split second and lost orientation but got away from him. He then grabbed me from behind and tried to choke me but I could
get him on my back and roll off to the side, I fell onto him and must have bruised a rip doing that.
We ended up on the floor fighting and luck for me I could get away a bit. But then he grabbed my foot and tried to drag me over the gravel. I had my
S3 safety shoes and launched the heal into his face, broke his eyesocket I learned later. Two guys come jumping over the fence and drag him off me,
one started to beat the puke out of him instantly but I could make him stop.
The other guy helped me wash the blood out of my face, that was coming from the nose and the lip that hit a tooth when he punched me. Scratched all
over and bruises. It went to court but that was settled. I got some blame for approaching him, was the reason. Should have just stayed away and not
seek an explanation why he bugs my phone and go to the police.
I did a lot things wrong, but one thing I swore to myself that my trust level is very low in future when it comes to guys. The mistake began when I
went to the IT guy, I should have went to the police directly with my suspicion about how he knows my details on that platform and how he could find
me that fast, standing on that forest road.
He lost his job btw. I called his boss and said I want someone else in future to show up for suspensions. Not said anything more but I know he lost
his job. His boss probably asked him why he looks like that and fired him.
Gotta love my luck with guys, really.