Supreme Chaos - SN2022

Swiftly, Supernatural and
Uncontrollable palpitations
Pervaded in and over
Every fibre of my being.
Reverentially, I cursed
Nature's prophecy being enacted.
Almighty lightning forked and struck mercilessly;
Thunder boomed and blasted relentlessly.
Utter chaos reigned supreme,
Reversing millennia of care and construct;
Absolving Earth of Mankind and sin,
Lovingly razing Terra for a New Aeon.

The END...literally!

Now that was different !! Well done !

a reply to: 727Sky

Thanks, 727Sky! I wanted to experiment with an acrostic technique. However, I'm terrible with rhymes and structure, so I couldn't make it more poetic... let's just call it freestyle.

a reply to: Encia22

Cerebral!

Cheers

Thanks for your submission,

Good Luck in the Contest!
Johnny

a reply to: Encia22

Setting the bar as high as possible on this one. Gotta up my game..

This was really good. Enjoyed the artistry of word use.

a reply to: Degradation33

Thank you very much for your kind words, Degradation33!

I look forward to reading your works; quality and satisfaction are guaranteed.

a reply to: Encia22

This was a really powerful story, and I loved it. I've read it several times, and I'm also impressed with your linear message. This is REALLY good work, imo.

Reverentially, I cursed
Nature's prophecy being enacted.

You pack so much meaning in so short a sentence. WOW!

Good work. Sorry took me a minute to get around to reading it. Star and flag 👍😊

a reply to: argentus

Thank you very much, argentus, it means a lot!

Actually, you've confirmed something I was pondering. This story took me about 15 minutes from start to finish. Once I had the acrostic concept established, I just wrote the first thing that came to mind. Hell, it took me longer to get the formatting right for the post. In the end, it's the one I'm happiest with.

My other stories are more architected, usually mulled over for a few days... and probably overthought and overdone. So, in the future, I need to let my heart drive the story and not my head.

a reply to: Compendium

Thank you kindly, Compendium!

So many stories have been posted it's hard to keep track of what we've read. I try to comment in each story because I enjoy giving feedback, but also it's a way to remember which stories I've already read.

a reply to: Encia22

What you describe is a constant that I always try to achieve: That where I am merely the observer, documenting the flow of the story, but somehow not contributing toward it, even though I know that the story is coming from another side of me.

Sounds like mental illness, right? It possibly is, but it is the most enjoyable thing about writing for me when I get into that beloved zone where I feel like I have to type like a bastard to just keep up with what is flowing before me. For me, it is the very best of things, and it's a state of mind(lessness) that I truly strive for.

a reply to: Encia22

P.s. Let it Rip!!! What do you have to lose? Take your mind off the leash and let it RUN!

a reply to: argentus

Yes, argentus, perfectly explained, and I see that process in your storytelling!

Creating mindlessly is the best method, but you really need to detach and let the ideas flow. In my case, some wine helps. It’s the same with my graphical art; the more I worry about technique, the more artificial it turns out, and the more I tweak it the worse it gets.

As you say, keeping up to speed with the creative process is also a difficult task. Even more despairing is when an idea pops into my head and I don’t jot it down immediately, thinking I’m sure to remember later… but later, it’s gone forever. No matter how hard I kick myself, the exact wording never returns. Those are the moments I truly believe that I’m not exactly right in the head. I’ve also been told I’m bordering on autism; perhaps it’s what influences my thoughts… I don’t know, it’s all psychological gibberish to me.

a reply to: argentus

Cheers, I try, but I risk a T&C ban if I don't remain composed. A big part of my character dialogues would require profanity, so I'm a bit stifled here. It's one of the reasons I don't have much dialogue in my stories... I feel I'd be artificially censoring what and how I'm trying to recount.

But, yeah, I'll try to let the beast out in other areas of my tales.

Thanks again for your feedback and input!

a reply to: Encia22

Two things that may or may not help:

1. I almost always carry a wee notepad and a pen. I will stop anytime while driving if something useful hits me. It doesn't have to be moving or inspriational, but the stuff -- as you say -- that you think you will remember but never do. Particularly song lyrics or even a musical theme.

2. When I write a story, I often write vile curse words, because they feel in context with the flow of the story. Then, after the movement is over, I will go back and edit out the naughty bits.

a reply to: argentus

Cheers for the tips, argentus.

I used to carry pen and paper, and now I've moved on to digital. I even tried an old Sony dictaphone. overtime time I realised nothing worked for me. I'm not a natural writer, or better, I don't think up stories starting with words. Arts, photos and visual gestures and stimuli are more at the root of my ideas.

I picture the story first and then figure out how to transform it into prose. So, when I'm inspired, jotting down keywords or brief dialogues isn't easy for me, in fact, I find it a painful process, and that's why and when the plot is lost. Instead, when I can freeze the thought, it gives me time to do some image researches, I keep galleries of all sorts of pictures and drawings that help me build a storyboard in my head.

a reply to: Encia22

Okay. You are more visual than I am. I don't want to try to pretend that I'm an expert or scholar. I think we all have something to learn and something to teach, often within the same day.

Perhaps it might be useful to you to visualize a story as a movie in your head, and watch how the characters interplay with each other and hopefully find yourself being surprised at how they flow through the situation. There has to be friction of some sort, or we are bored; we are creatures of the last few decades, and our attention span is fleeting.

I think you're a very good writer. If you self-published on Amazon and I knew it was you, I would buy the Kindle book and probably the whole series, assuming the first one gave me what I needed.

a reply to: argentus

I value your advice, argentus, scholarly or not. You're right, learning is a lifelong occupation.

Your compliment and publication suggestion knocked me for six. It's the last thing I ever thought of doing. My old English literature teacher would be turning in his grave. According to him, I was a total dunce; failing in syntax, grammar, structure, spelling, etc., made me give up on school and I started working at the tender age of 16.

It also put me off reading in general. Doing mostly Gov. IT work for the last 35 years left me little interest in reading fiction... mostly tech magazines and Gov. legislation. I think I've read less than ten books in the last 20 years. That's probably why I'm not influenced by other authors, except Shakespeare and Dante. In any case, ATS has given me a platform to start reading again and express myself, too.

Also, I enjoy and respect the breadth of your writing style and would be curious to read more extended works. Do you publish your work or have you plans to self-publish?

a reply to: Encia22

I will offer this: dialogue is the way people talk, and has little bearing in language arts, proper grammar and syntax. Likewise, when the characters in our stories think things, the manner in which they think and their language also talks about who they are.

My favorite author is Elmore "Dutch" Leonard. Dutch's dialogue was so real and natural that it whisked you along in the story without any sense that you were IN a story. He rarely described people, but let their actions and words inspire the creativity of the reader to shape images of the people.