Marrying The Moon

Which half?

A lot of you people be assuming the gender of the moon. How dare you?

You don't know zir gender, so back off and give the moon some space until ze announced zir gender.
:

originally posted by: nerbot
a reply to: BarbaraTheEnlightened1

It's going to be a hollow relationship.

originally posted by: cmdrkeenkid
a reply to: BarbaraTheEnlightened1

What lunacy.

If you're married to the Moon how could you own half of it? If the Moon truly were a sentient being then ownership of it implies slavery. Slavery has been illegal in the United States since 1863.

Since you cited Florida laws as giving you ownership of half the property through marital rights that must mean you intend to file a marriage certificate to back this up. How will the Moon sign? Which county are you filing in? Which of the following is officiating?

Section 741.07, Florida Statutes, provides that the following persons are authorized to solemnize matrimony:

State judicial officers (judges)
Retired state judicial officers
Federal judges serving in a court with jurisdiction over a part of this state (per Attorney General informal opinion, May 14, 1996)
Clerks of the Circuit Court. Note: Section 28.06 authorizes Clerks to appoint deputy clerks who have all the same powers of the Clerk.
Regularly ordained ministers of the Gospel, elders, or other ordained clergy, if in good standing with his or her affiliate church or denomination
Notaries Public
Designated members of the Society of Friends (Quakers)

Also, what is the significance of tomorrow to the Moon? Did the Moon convert to Christianity at some point? Why not wait a couple more days for the full phase on Feb 16? Or the new phase a couple weeks later

Good luck with your nuptials.

I’m sorry to disappoint ya’ll but Ocean Tide bought a certificate on EBay which allows him to legally marry us. He is also a Druid so he knows a thing or two about the moon and he says it’s completely male.

Now would you allow NASA or space x or whoever to land on your wife? I think not! When we are man and wife, the moon will be protected under the ethics of marriage.

As for tomorrow, it’s Valentine’s Day, what a perfect day for us to state our love.

P.S Ocean Tides friend, Big Bear will be signing on behalf of the moon.

Sorry to inform you of this but your spouse is about to get hurt .. Theres a rocket heading right for it at 5700 mph


Fox News

a reply to: BarbaraTheEnlightened1

Congratulations , where's the Honeymoon ... I hear Jupiter is nice this time of year.

originally posted by: Ravenwatcher
Sorry to inform you of this but your spouse is about to get hurt .. Theres a rocket heading right for it at 5700 mph


Fox News

This is barbaric! If the virus wasn’t bad enough, now China are trying to hurt my beloved. Once we are bound, I’d like to see them try it again.

I’ve also heard rumours of countries wanting to drill the moon. Disgusting, would you allow your wife or husband to be drilled by strangers?

I’ve also heard rumours of countries wanting to drill the moon. Disgusting, would you allow your wife or husband to be drilled by strangers?

Well I am getting older a little excitement wouldn't hurt

a reply to: BarbaraTheEnlightened1


Oh, hey, I was just thinking about your coming nuptials and recalled that you mentioned renaming some of the dry lakes. Does that extend to the possibility of renaming some of the large craters? You know, you could rename say, the Clavius Crater in honor of your spirit guide Brad. Brad Pit.

a reply to: BarbaraTheEnlightened1
If the moon is made of 🧀 cheese then you realise he'll have a cheesy cock?

a reply to: TerryMcGuire

Good one.

a reply to: BarbaraTheEnlightened1



I don't know who "Ocean Tide" is, but it doesn't sound like they're a legal minister in the eyes of the law in Florida. Druid is not a legally recognized religion in the State of Florida, so they do not follow under the legal ministers I listed in my previous post. This is regardless of whatever document they purchased off eBay claims. On top of this, no one can legally sign for another unless they have a durable power of attorney, so any signature by "Big Bear" would also not be valid.

Secondly, I think that "Ocean Tide" does not "know a thing or two about the moon" being male, despite his claims and religion. Cerridwen is the Moon Goddess in the religion, and definitely female. She was created by the Queen of the Druids, Druantia, who is also female.

Thirdly, the Druids also would hold their ceremonies based off the Moon. It was very important to their religion, so "Ocean Tide" should surely want to wait to officiate until a few days when the moon is in its full phase. Also, Valentine's Day is a Christian holiday. Why would you want to hold a pagan ceremony on a Christian Day?

In conclusion, Bernard?

a reply to: cmdrkeenkid

Bernard.

Where is he when we need him?