The First Time You Ever Got 'Beat Up'.

A lot of us have taken our share of beatings...The thing that got me thinking of this was my son..I overheard him say something to one of his buddies about 'being a Man'..lol. I love my Boy dearly but sometimes he just tickles the crap out of me. He's 17, never had to want for anything, never been bullied, always been popular, has loads of freedom, and is supported in everything (everything I wanted for him)...Key here..Hes never been beat up...I didn't come here to tell you guys the stories of all the times Ive taken beatings of about every kind. Many have had it way worse..thats why no 'war stories' from me..But I would really like to hear yours.

When I heard the boy talking of things Manly, I didn't know exactly what to say to him, so I waited. I came to this..Casually.."Hey Boy O', You aren't a 'Man' until you've fought something that you knew from the outset could defeat You." (in his case it would be himself) Of course he looked at me with a dull expression and acted like he understood, then proceeded to ask his mom for gas money..LOLOL..Please don't take this wrong, I don't want my son to get beat up to learn how to be a Man, actually quite the opposite, and all I ever wanted as a father was for mine not to have to go through what I went through, and so far that's been a success, but at a cost. The hard lessons I learned were worth it...But the only way I can pass them down is by living the example..Not forced like I was..I hope it works. He has never had to do anything he didn't want to..Thats the cost. Would I have been tougher on him if his Mom would have let me? Or will my example of tolerance be enough when it comes time for him to actually be a Man?

So on to the war stories..First and worst beatings, I want to hear about them.

a reply to: didntasktobeborned

I was 18 when Jack beat up real good, I was totally out of it the next day. Ever since then I learned to respect Mr. Daniels abilities to inflict pain.

Getting beaten up doesn't make you a man, if you live by the good attributes men posses you're a man, if you can't you're a boy.

a reply to: didntasktobeborned

I've had my ass beat plenty of times (some were deserved), but I can't really remember the details of the 'worst' beatings. When you get hit hard enough, neither your mind nor your body wants to remember it.

Also, during most of the worst one's, I was pretty drunk at the time, which is also the reason why some of them were deserved, and also why they became the worst one's, because even though I was losing I still wouldn't keep my mouth shut.lol... Still talking shyt, even while getting beat. lol

My first fights weren't really fights. They were more just wrestling around in the grass, either on the school playground or a neighbors yard. They may have slightly escalated and turned into something that felt more like a real fight at the time, but they weren't really.

a reply to: didntasktobeborned

When I was a little kid my father used to beat me up regularly, most of the time in a psychopathic way, I mean beaten like a dog until one day I hit him back when I became older. That painful experience has affected me deeply while growing up, I see the world with a different set of eyes, harsher.

Now I've forgiven him and we're in very good terms. I know what he suffers from. After all we live in a blind psychopathic world.

a reply to: didntasktobeborned

I got beat up many times as a child. It was the best thing to ever happen to me.
I wasn’t scared of anything in high school or older. Men did not scare me.
Because men did not scare me I didn’t ever attract the abuser types.

I was your son's age when I got my eye socket shattered with a steel toe boot. 3 vs. 1, wasn't fair. It was 2 guys and the girl that I had just broke up with. She gave me the boot to the eye. She's now locked up for murder. About 5 years after my encounter, another boyfriend left her. She went to his place of work and shot him in the face.

first one stung a bit more than most. I was being picked on by a couple kids, and wasn't big enough to fight back, so I found a kid who was easier to pick on than me. I messed with him a bit, and after a couple days, his big sister beat the snot out of me. 1st grade. She was in third. What she lacked in beauty, she made up for in size. I learned that actions have consequences, and ended my career as a bully on that day.

I'd thank John Mesa's sister, but I doubt she remembers.

After that, I was selective in the fights I would participate in. I only was in the one's I knew I could win. All two of them.
And learning how bad brown liquor can fluck you up never seems to be an easy lesson to grasp the first time. it seems you always have to verify that was the culprit. Pro tip- it was.

When I was a kid and living in a rural area of other country, I had to walk about 2 miles on the dirt to get to school, even rainy days. No umbrella, no lunch, no bottled water, no phones, no minivan.

Sometimes we had problems, the teacher used to send another student to get the boxing gloves. Make the 2 students wear them and fight one long single round. Usually, the first bleeding nose was the loser.

Then shake hands and go back to class.

A revenge outside school wasn't tolerated. Teacher will suspend you and your parents would beat you at home.

a reply to: didntasktobeborned

I have a story, the time I got beat up.

Some dudes (who I knew) set up my best friend to get robbed for $500 at gunpoint. We were about 19.

Then I threw a rager house party, like 100 people. The dude who set up him showed up, and my friend was there too. I was pretty buzzed. Anyways, I called my friend up over and asked him if the dude, standing in front of me, set him up. "Yes." So, I decked the guy. He and his crew fled but on their way out pulled the house phone out. This was before most people had cell phones.

About an hour later they return in force, but one of them had a gun. Two of them came up to me, one being the guy who had set up my friend. This time they had a knife and large metal maglight. The dude with the maglight hit me a few times in the head. I managed to fight them off and not get stabbed, and rolled out. Then they bounced, thankfully. But, I was pouring blood down my head and having been hit near the temple, had a popped blood vessel in one eye (it was blood red).

That was my last real fight. What I learned from it is don't get in a fight unless it's truly necessary, as it may escalate (especially if it was worth it i.e. a serious situation), and think it through, don't do it at your own house, etc.

But, the dude who set my friend up did get humiliated in front of a large group and only won the second fight because he and his crew came back armed and en force.

a reply to: didntasktobeborned

Double post

Getting beaten up doesn't make you a man,

Pretty sure the Op said nothing about getting beat up making one a Man. Matter of fact, I seem to recall them saying that the best they could figure, was that the act of 'fighting' something that one knows can defeat them is an aspect of being human. Part of the choices we face and how we deal with them. I took a lot of it as figurative and heavy reference.

Really though I think getting 'beat up' in any way teaches us. Even if it is simply that there is no dishonor in a hasty retreat.

originally posted by: LordAhriman
I was your son's age when I got my eye socket shattered with a steel toe boot. 3 vs. 1, wasn't fair. It was 2 guys and the girl that I had just broke up with. She gave me the boot to the eye. She's now locked up for murder. About 5 years after my encounter, another boyfriend left her. She went to his place of work and shot him in the face.

Ouch sorry to hear that. Yeah, it's lame to lose a fight to a group of people, but ultimately, that's superior force. Same happened to me.

a reply to: didntasktobeborned

He's 17, never had to want for anything, never been bullied, always been popular, has loads of freedom, and is supported in everything

He has never had to do anything he didn't want to

Spoiling him is NOT helping him. The world is not a kind place and the sooner he figures that out, the better. I'm not saying he should go start a fight just for the experience, but it's coming sooner or later. Not everyone is going to like him and some will out and out hate him. He may be popular and well liked in school , but it doesn't work like that in the real world.
Bar fight, jealous ex boyfriend or just some asshole in traffic, it's going to happen, so you'd be better off sending him to martial arts classes or boxing.

I took a beating I thoroughly deserved from a guy who was a lot older than me when I was nineteen. I spotted him in a pub years later. I waited outside for him and launched a very cowardly surprise attack on him with a broken pool cue and scarred him for life. It is to my everlasting shame that I did something so despicable.

School bully took me on in 8th. grade....we both got a bloody nose out of it.

I think his name was 'CornPop'.

I... never got beaten. On the contrary, I was very quick to defend myself when I was threatened.

Until I beat a guy and he didn't come back to school until a week later, still very bruised, soul and all...

I then decided enough was enough, and I decided to stand my ground with words.

People are so easily scared... haha I explained that to my kids.

Stand your ground; people don't know you and don't know what YOU can do or not.

APPEARANCE of confidence is the key.

a reply to: coamanach

People are so easily scared... haha I explained that to my kids. Stand your ground; people don't know you and don't know what YOU can do or not. APPEARANCE of confidence is the key

This is 100000% true.
I’m small and many a fool thought they could bark at me and did not expect me to bark back.
Most people are all bark and no bite. The people you really need to be scared of are the quiet ones. Those are the people that will really jack you up.

Such a dangerous philosophy.

a reply to: coamanach

a reply to: Dalamax

Well, I think talking is better than physically fighting.

I hate it. When I saw how bad I could be, I was firmly resolved to never be that again.

And chose to stand my ground by talking my way out of things.

In my first year of high school, I went with clothes from the 70's I found in bags that my parents kept. And in those days, the look of Michael Jackson was in. I looked totally the opposite of what was in.

And yet, I have never been bullied. I was confident in myself and I guess it showed.

I was told by a coworker once that I was pissing him off when I was walking because I walked like I was a King. But he immediately told me it was because his own father always told him to walk with confidence, chin up and chest filled with air, and he just couldn't but wished he could, and I made him think of that. He ended up admitting it was jealousy...

Same thing happens in nature. Predators, as fierce as they me be or look ALWAYS go after the one either isolated or weak looking.

Heck, I began a new job a few months ago, and when I was presented to the staff, I was told that one guy freaked and yelled when one made a mistake. Everybody agreed he was scary and that it happened at least once to everybody in the place. Even he said "Yeah, you would really hear about me" I laughed and said that if and when that day would come, I would laugh while he'd be mad because when people yell at me, I do laugh. But that I would still hear his recommendations.
He laughed too when he heard my reply and he's always smiling when we meet.

Confidence is the key, and I don't see how that is dangerous.

Make of it what you will, but I once was robbed by a couple of guys armed with a knife. And they left with less than they got at first, because I used words to puzzle them. They gave me back part of what they took...

Because of words, spoken with confidence.