When "they" tell you it's OK to pee, it's a trap.

Since it's been raining here for almost two months straight, and folks seem to be presenting bathroom related threads today, I thought I would offer a story. The other night, my grandson came into our bedroom at some point in the middle of the night. he was sleepwalking and talking about having to pee. My wife told him to go to the bathroom. Rather than make the long walk (about 8 steps from where he was) He chose to pull it out and pee there. Right on the side of the bed, and into the drawer in the bed base where my wife keeps her jeans and sweatshirts. She screamed, woke me up, made him cry, and shuttled him off to the bathroom to finish, and then came back to explain to me what "we" needed to do about this. (my side was dry and I was fine with waiting until the morning to deal with this, but amazingly enough, I lost out and had to help right then.

So we finish cleaning it up, put her "soiled" cloths into the washer, re-made the bed, and I was able to go back to sleep. At some point after all that, I had a dream. I had to pee super bad. In the dream, I would pee, and immediately after, I had to pee again, just as bad or worse. Everywhere I went, I was told (by someone I couldn't see or hear) that it was OK to pee right there. Some of the places seemed wrong, but I peed anyway, and then had to go again. At some point, I must have been close to actually letting them trick me, and I jumped up and ran to the bathroom. I made it, and was able to not piss on the bed. (Yea me!) My reaction woke up my wife, who hollered at me for waking her up, and I assured her that my actions were justified and she should be proud of me for not pissing on her for the second time that night. She gave me that disgusted look and went back to bed.

So I suppose the moral of the story is, don't believe "them" when they tell you this, it's a trap.

a reply to: network dude

I had a nephew stay overnight one time. He got up in the middle of the night, sleepwalking. He walked into the kitchen, pulled out the broiler drawer on the range and pissed right into it.

Funnily enough, the only time I ever really did any sleepwalking was one time when I was a kid. My folks said I wandered out of my bedroom, through the living room, and started rambling around the kitchen. The couldn't figure out what I was doing. Mom followed me out and caught me hovering over the open dishwasher door with my pants down.

She asked me if I needed to go to the bathroom, and I nodded. She told me it was back there and pointed farther back toward the door. I looked at it and went.

Then I wandered back to bed.

I never said anything or talked about it at all the next day. They don't think I was awake, and if I was, I wasn't fully awake.

a reply to: butcherguy

was it white?

I only ask as in our first year of marriage, I thought indulging in bourbon and coke one night was a fantastic idea. I stumbled around a few hours after going to bed and found the only thing that was white around, a thin doyle on my wife's cedar chest. She wasn't a fan of me having bourbon and cokes after that, and I agreed.

a reply to: network dude

ATS needs a Pee Pee Forum

a reply to: JAGStorm

I'm not sure that's a good idea. In fact, I'm not sure this thread will be here later. Time will tell.

My Mother-in- law has mobility issues and has a a Zimmer frame to aid her around her apartment, and a Rollater for when she leaves the flat to walk around her complex, which isn’t very often, and it has a compartment for carrying items and can be used as a seat for when she wants to chew the fat with neighbours.

She fell around 18 months ago and had to have a hip replacement. When she returned to her apartment, we had to arrange for an hospital bed to be installed and a commode toilet for the bedroom.

We received a frantic call from her one night and she was extremely upset. It appears that during the night, she needed Togo to the toilet. However, instead of using the commode toilet in her bedroom, she had made her way to the lounge, lifted up the Rollater seat and had actually used this to do her business, both types.

Oh how I laughed and laughed and laughed. Mrs Cobaltic wasn’t impressed with her Mum, or me for that matter.

originally posted by: network dude
a reply to: JAGStorm

I'm not sure that's a good idea. In fact, I'm not sure this thread will be here later. Time will tell.

Mine's still up...so you're good.

EDT...Gone now.
Brace for impact.

originally posted by: network dude
I only ask as in our first year of marriage, I thought indulging in bourbon and coke one night was a fantastic idea.

Who are you? Hunter Biden?


Oh, hah, you meant soda...

a reply to: network dude

Sometimes...when I'm sleeping...I know I need to wake up and go take a leak...when toilets and urinals start randomly showing up in my dreams.

'Toilet Fridays' on ATS ought to become a regular thing.

originally posted by: IAMTAT
'Toilet Fridays' on ATS ought to become a regular thing.

With all the politics why would that be any different from the rest of the week?

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: IAMTAT
'Toilet Fridays' on ATS ought to become a regular thing.

With all the politics why would that be any different from the rest of the week?

Unfortunately, it's a lot harder to flush politicians.

a reply to: IAMTAT

Your problem is you're leaving them whole, this is why they invented industrial wood chippers.

At age 42, I've had that dream several times. They always lie.

Dang, I missed the other thread, but I let rip in the shower. And, best of all, I have shower beers. As soon as I get home, I grab a brew and hop in the shower. Its the best.

originally posted by: Jason79
At age 42, I've had that dream several times. They always lie.

as you progress in age, they get craftier and better at their trickery. You have to be vigilant. (almost 52 here)
stay strong!

originally posted by: lakenheath24
Dang, I missed the other thread, but I let rip in the shower. And, best of all, I have shower beers. As soon as I get home, I grab a brew and hop in the shower. Its the best.

Since I usually shower at 6:30am, I think I'll have to try this. it sounds fantastic!

originally posted by: JAGStorm
a reply to: network dude

ATS needs a Pee Pee Forum

The mods would probably have a fit if we did,they would be too
busy in that forum.Can you imagine the types of threads that
would be posted and then trash canned? They would be fun for
a time or two until abused.

Thanks ND. Best laugh I had all day.

⭐️&🇺🇸