Coronavirus: Be a Guardian Angel for your Elderly Neighbor

It is a sad sad truth that those most at risk from the Coronavirus -- the elderly -- are also the most likely to live alone. And as more and more social gatherings and services are closed down, their contact with the outside world will be even more restricted. It's gotta be a crazy scary time for older people with no family or friends to watch out for them, someone to run errands and do shopping so they can self-isolate and protect themselves, someone to just ask "Are you doing okay?" and reassure them that they aren't alone and abandoned.

Let's step up to the plate. If you have an elderly neighbor, or even an older neighbor or co-worker, who lives alone and has no one to look out for them, please be their Guardian Angel through this crisis. Give them a call or stop by every day to check up on them. If you're going to the market, ask if they need anything. Pick up some puzzle books or magazines or a deck of cards to help them entertain themselves. Maybe make a little extra at dinner time and bring them a good hot home-cooked meal. Or, if it seems safe, invite them to join you for dinner. Make sure they have your phone number easily accessible in case of an emergency. The same for their doctor's phone number. Help them get their insurance papers in order just in case. Just be a friend and given them a little love.

I can't imagine how frightened some of these people must be -- and for good reason. The very real health risks are scary enough... add in the doom porn and fear mongering, and I'm sure it can be overwhelming. We can't fix everything for them. But we can make sure they aren't dealing with the unimaginable all alone.

We are facing a potential crisis, but together we can rise above it, let our best shine through, and take care of each other. Regardless of what government does or doesn't do. We can be each other's Guardian Angels. We can show them how it's done.

And for our fellow ATSers who are in this position, we'll be here for you as well. We may not be able to drop by or pick up groceries for you, but we'll help any way we can. If you are in need, let us know. ATSers are pretty smart. And they have huge hearts. We'll figure something out.

Anything you can add to this, please do! Any other people we should be taking under our wings? Any other thoughts on how to help our fellow peeps?

a reply to: Boadicea

being a cynic - its my opinion that people will start pretending to be " guardian angels " - so that when the old gidders die - they can loot thier homes .

welcome to the real world

a reply to: Boadicea

This could also be a great way for asymptomatic carriers to spread it to elderly people.

Maybe give them a call?

originally posted by: Atsbhct
a reply to: Boadicea

This could also be a great way for asymptomatic carriers to spread it to elderly people.

This is a risk, but a necessary risk. No one can completely isolate. They need food and supplies from the outside world at the very least. And we all need human contact.

But it's a good reminder to take extra care when visiting. Wash your hands and face, then don't touch your face, perhaps even wear a face mask. If bringing goods and supplies, wipe down what you can with Lysol wipes. If bringing meals, make sure it's hot and cooked through, minimizing contamination.

Maybe give them a call?

Definitely. Not every check-in needs to be in person.

It’s a great sentiment! My mom used to put a bundle of flowers in my hand and send me to my elderly neighbor’s, Ms. Young. She would give me hard candy and we’d sit and chat about school. It was a great exercise in awareness, even though slightly awkward.

Getting groceries could be a scary though for the elderly at this point. I think it would be safer than them trying to get out and shop in some of the panicked communities.

Plenty of ways to do it safely. I appreciate the sentiment and have been keeping my eyes open.

a reply to: Boadicea

My mom is old and just wont listen. She just shrugs her shoulders and says this virus doesn't matter.

My grandmother and grandfather are the same.

I'm not helping anyone that doesn't want my help.

Great sentiment but you also want to avoid potentially transmitting it. I go to the shops and check in on a couple of people who live nearby with dementia and similar, I imagine that's one of the major risks of contracting it at the moment.

It's really good to introduce yourself to their family/carers if they have any to help put their minds at ease and swap phone numbers so family/carers can let you know if they're ill and can't make it or you can contact them in case of emergency.

I have carers myself and they're short staffed at the moment as people have to take a week off with even a minor cold to be on the safe side/keep the company looking professional. I wouldn't say people are all that frightened of it but a lot of support groups, care teams and activity groups are/will soon be cancelled due to Corona and boredom/isolation is the biggest annoyance and health risk so far.

a reply to: Boadicea

A nice thought, but I'd have to ask; why wasn't anyone doing that anyway?

originally posted by: raedar
It’s a great sentiment! My mom used to put a bundle of flowers in my hand and send me to my elderly neighbor’s, Ms. Young. She would give me hard candy and we’d sit and chat about school. It was a great exercise in awareness, even though slightly awkward.

Oh my goodness -- me too! Mrs. Sledge. I was usually given irises to bring her. Pretty yellow and white ones. Sometimes fresh baked bread or a cinnamon roll. I know what you mean about slightly awkward, but still intriguing too, eh?

Getting groceries could be a scary though for the elderly at this point. I think it would be safer than them trying to get out and shop in some of the panicked communities.

Plenty of ways to do it safely.

That's my thought too. It's very risky for the elderly to be out and about, but much less risk for contact with one person. And it's much less risky for the young and healthy to be out and about than for the elderly. Especially if they rely on public transport to get there -- exponentially increasing their risk. And if they can't find what they need at one store, having to try to get to another store.

I appreciate the sentiment and have been keeping my eyes open.

That's awesome. Thank you for being that person.

a reply to: scraedtosleep

Sounds like your mom and grandparents don't need or want any help right now!

But I'm betting if push comes to shove, and they do want or need help, you'll be there for them and you'll be an amazing Angel for them

a reply to: bastion

It's really good to introduce yourself to their family/carers if they have any to help put their minds at ease and swap phone numbers so family/carers can let you know if they're ill and can't make it or you can contact them in case of emergency.

Excellent tip -- thank you!

I did not think about the additional needs of dementia or Alzheimer's patients, who may not have the cognitive ability to know when they need help. And, yes, I expect support systems to gradually (or suddenly) become unavailable.

originally posted by: DBCowboy
a reply to: Boadicea

A nice thought, but I'd have to ask; why wasn't anyone doing that anyway?

I'm not sure I want to know the answer.

But here's hoping that will change for the better -- whatever the answer.

In my country it is recommened NOT to visit elderly people because they are in risk group. There are different ways to get them help they need. If it is groceries, markets can home deliver so that they leave products on the door. Also there are big kitchens in every county which prepares food for schools, nursing homes etc, and have home delivery option too.

a reply to: dollukka

In my country it is recommened NOT to visit elderly people because they are in risk group.

Wow. That's pretty harsh. I understand their reasoning, and of course all contacts should be limited and minimized, but that's rather hard on the elderly.

There are different ways to get them help they need. If it is groceries, markets can home deliver so that they leave products on the door. Also there are big kitchens in every county which prepares food for schools, nursing homes etc, and have home delivery option too.

We have various ways of helping seniors also, I'm not sure how much longer that will be though. I've heard of two senior day care centers which have been closed just this week. I know Meals-on-Wheels is running shorthanded right now as well. One retirement community has closed their community kitchen.

If the situation does go south quick, there may not be anyone working to fulfill any of these options. Or they may just be shut down out of caution. We'll have to see, eh?

a reply to: Boadicea

It is not harsh, you can always call them by phone but you should not visit them unless it totally necessary. They are not without help so don´t get me wrong. Most elderly here has a security button on their wrist and if they need help they just push it and nurse comes and check them out, or they can call service director if they need food service etc. and it will be delivered

In these times it is understandtable that we think we should help elderly, but systems are set and they are not without help. You should ask which is better help from neighbour who doesnt know how to protect himself or the elder he wants to help.. or staff which is trained to help and does it with much lower risk to elder ?

Nice thread, and I've been trying to stock up for everyone around me as well as their pets.

a reply to: dollukka

Well, it sounds like the people you're talking about aren't alone then, so they're not the people I'm talking about.

Obviously, if someone has a better option, then of course go with that!

But some people do not or will not have better options. At least not here. They may not have any options at all. And while it's all fine and well to say, "Oh, gee, I might get them sick," if no one is there to help them, then catching coronavirus is the least of their worries. We can take reasonable precautions for reasonable risks.

No need to turn our backs on anyone.

originally posted by: toolgal462
Nice thread, and I've been trying to stock up for everyone around me as well as their pets.

That's really wonderful. That's how it's done. Thank you for being that person.

We stocked my in-laws up last week, and I picked up some things for one of my husband's co-workers that has come down with something. We've talked with our neighbors and I'm happy to say we're all in a pretty good spot.

I've also heard from a couple ATSers by email this morning who told me they're doing the same. One I know in real life, but we haven't told each other our screen names, and I didn't tell him it was my thread... he actually told me if we need anything to let him know. I thought that was very sweet. He also asked for my survivor cookie recipe! The other has taken a break from ATS, but we keep in touch by email, and she's been checking in and shopping for a couple of her neighbors.

I'm heartened and encouraged and feel a little more optimistic for us all!!!

originally posted by: scraedtosleep
a reply to: Boadicea

My mom is old and just wont listen. She just shrugs her shoulders and says this virus doesn't matter.

My grandmother and grandfather are the same.

I'm not helping anyone that doesn't want my help.

With that apparent attitude I'm not sure what kind of "help" you could possibly give them. Perhaps they are not taken in by the hysteria so many people seem to be exhibiting.

And this is what I'm talking about:

Oregon woman describes how tearful elderly couple asked her to help them buy groceries because they were too scared of coronavirus to enter store

'I went to the grocery store this afternoon. As I was walking in I heard a woman yell to me from her car. I walked over and found an elderly woman and her husband. She cracked her window open a bit more, and explained to me nearly in tears that they are afraid to go in the store,' Mehra wrote.

'Afraid to get sick as they are in their 80's and hear that the novel coronavirus is affecting older people disproportionately. And that they don't have family around to help them out. Through the crack in the window she handed me a $100 bill and a grocery list, and asked if I would be willing to buy her groceries.

Mehra took the money and list, which had basic necessities on it.

'I bought the groceries and placed them in her trunk, and gave her back the change. She told me she had been sitting in the car for nearly 45 min before I had arrived, waiting to ask the right person for help,' Mehra continued.

'I know it's a time of hysteria and nerves, but offer to help anyone you can. Not everyone has people to turn to,' she said.

Crises bring out the best and the worst in people. Sadly, it's in large part because of the "worst" that we so sorely need the "best". Thank heaven for the heroes!