Contacting an ex... Why do I feel like I need to now?

a reply to: crimsongod21
Yes, your right. But reality is just that unfortunately. My exposure to humans has observed too much embracing of sin and corruption. It is just too commonplace IRL from my experience, and too many others'. Especially more so in houses of worship, detention centers, and your average workplace.

Have you even met all the 'sincere wives' at adult encounters clubs yet?? Their just lucky cameras and phones are banned, or it wouldn't be online confessions years later that reveals their sinful delights .

GOD BLESS those bored wives and girlfriends though 👍

a reply to: crimsongod21

I was in your position once, had a kid on the way, was living my life with a good woman and everything felt fine. One day I woke up and couldn't get her (my ex from a decade before) out of my head for some reason. Flashes of memories, good times and bad, kept popping up.

I convinced myself it was nothing but I kept finding myself thining about it during my idle time. After a few slow weeks I couldn't take it anymore, I just wanted to catch up. I caved and ended up calling her at about midnight. I barely said her name and she recognised my voice. It was as though that long 10 years never happened. She sounded the same, everything came flooding back. I honestly didn't know what to say on the call after that.

After what seemed like 10 minutes she said, "I still think about you all the time" and I felt this well of emotion in the pit of my stomach that I can't even describe. She said she had always loved me and she always would. It honestly felt like destiny that out of nowhere I get an urge to see someone, to each out to them, when I hadn't given them a thought in years. It was like an unstoppable force made this happen, like we were magnets of limitless range being pulled together.

We talked a few more times over the next week and we eventually agreed to meet. We met at a cafe about 2 hours away from where we both live (sort of an in-between-our-places kinda deal).

I recognised her from behind as I walked in the cafe, her hair, her shape, she hadn't changed a bit. I sort of just stood there stunned for a few seconds, this woman, this angel, in the flesh, exactly as had been dreaming over the last few weeks. I didn't even speak before she looked around and I swear her eyes pierced right through me into my soul. It was blinding.

Well to cut a long story short, it's 6 years later, I am the happiest I have ever been in my life, I have a new son, my new wife has her dream job, we got two goofy labradors and everything is perfect. I get to spend my life with the one who almost got away.

All that stuff I just said was a pile of crap, I just made it up, don't be stupid, don't call her.

a reply to: BelowLowAnnouncement

Lmao no intention of calling her just trying to work out why she is in my head so much lately.

originally posted by: one4all
She doesn't want to hear from you....you are a Family man...you are out of play big fella….lol...lol....but dreams are free...why don't you buy a MyPillow designed and sold by an ex-CRACK dealer Mike Lindell ...they say it performs miracles....mudt be something in the fabric huh????….lol...lol. but it might make your dreams come true.

Wow..Dude...you're on a crusade!

We got it!!

Relax a little, eat an ice cream or something! I promise, I won't buy one!

Back on-topic...I do agree with your first part (right up to the word "free"...where the pillow jihad takes over).

a reply to: crimsongod21

You are sooooo wrong. Leave the past where it belongs...

*This happened to me*

Found and reconnected with a grade school girl and we grad. high school together where I completely ignored her..later finding her 20 yrs ltr when the "internet" exploded.

We reconnected online then on phone. My wife knew we were talking and understood...it was cool.

One day...I stopped hearing from her. Almost 5-6 months go by with no contact and I hear outta nowhere from a girl who found my name, emails, and phone #, a friend of hers.

She had died from alcohol poisoning, cirrohsis of the liver. Can't see that in emails, rt? I was stunned and I realized you just don't know how people change.

Leave them in the past, with pleasant memories intact...concentrate on the blessings you have now.

The I "Shoulda-Coulda-Would" attitude will get you nowhere....now*

* Sad, to add. "I'm sorry I ignored you all those years Cheri. R.I.P."

a reply to: crimsongod21

One's mind will always tempt, whether for re-igniting what once was, or what could be, or for that thrill when life is steady and a good thing.

You have two kids and one on the way - these little people see you as THE most important person in their lives. Their lives will always be impacted by who you are, what you do, and the choices you make. Whatever choices you make it has consequences on your kids - the people you have brought into this world. You have a new responsibility - to them, and to your wife.

Don't do it. You are going to open up a can of worms. I think you need to mature (said with respect). You made a choice to walk away from your ex years ago and even if you've changed and matured in those years it is your wife you chose to be with forever. Don't destroy what you have.

I only see disaster waiting if you make any move towards your ex. And checking in on her blogs... you need to cut the tie and do it now. You can't have it all friend, stand by the choice you committed to your wife and now your kids. They are all that matter.

Maybe some unknown closure.


Man... I hope I don't get to that point. I can't stand my X.

It's just a phase, part of getting over it.

My wife and I made a pact that if we ever split up, we vowed not ever get back together.

It worked for 22+ years.

originally posted by: hiddeninsite
a reply to: crimsongod21

One's mind will always tempt, whether for re-igniting what once was, or what could be, or for that thrill when life is steady and a good thing.

You have two kids and one on the way - these little people see you as THE most important person in their lives. Their lives will always be impacted by who you are, what you do, and the choices you make. Whatever choices you make it has consequences on your kids - the people you have brought into this world. You have a new responsibility - to them, and to your wife.

Don't do it. You are going to open up a can of worms. I think you need to mature (said with respect). You made a choice to walk away from your ex years ago and even if you've changed and matured in those years it is your wife you chose to be with forever. Don't destroy what you have.

I only see disaster waiting if you make any move towards your ex. And checking in on her blogs... you need to cut the tie and do it now. You can't have it all friend, stand by the choice you committed to your wife and now your kids. They are all that matter.

This ^^^ 👍🏼

a reply to: StallionDuck

Maybe some unknown closure.

Ayup. Definitely, IMO of course (and the person who said it first )

Consider it a final step to letting go.

Maybe she thought about how much of catch you were and it gave you the itch.

Sure give her a call if you want to wreck your family. Your kids will be ever grateful you had this "feeling" when they visit you in shoebox flat you can afford on weekends on.

Then make sure you blame the ex when it goes to hell when you screw her life up too, but hopefully she doesn't return your call as she has no interest in you.

Your intentions are all so innocent.
That b*tch, those B*tch women and how they wrecked your life....

You seem to do not get the seriousness of what you are talking about here with all your laughinh.

Do not call. Just do not do it. Others have said it before. The worst thing you could do now is call your ex.

Your wife needs you, you have two kids and she is pregnant? Get your ## together! Man up for your decisions in life. It is not only about you, you are a father.

If you can not stop dreaming and do not love your wife, instead of using your current family as a reserve, break up and THEN contact your ex. But it is easier to do what you plan, right?

To explain my hard words, I was in a very similar situation but on the other side.

In the end, do whatever you think you need to do.

I'm the kind of person, that if I'm thinking of someone, I contact them.

Maybe she does need help, we forge very strong psychic bonds with others some times.

I don't really think you should contact her, but maybe you should talk to your wife about your feeling and see if she would mind you contacting your ex's parents, to see if she is OK.

Pregnant women can be pretty ratty, be warned.

But she might be OK with it, just to clear your head, so you can stop worrying. Maybe you could contact an old friend that you have in common.

Just make sure your wife knows about it, and is OK with it.

Has your ex still got her blog going?

a reply to: crimsongod21

Its' possible that you may just be looking for some closure. Even though so many years have gone by, she was someone special in your life. It's ok to contact her, as a friend, see how she's doing, what's new in her life. And you let her know about yourself; your family, your children. And then close that chapter...Best of luck.

a reply to: crimsongod21

I think it is because you have the wish to express emotions you never had the chance to do.. a sudden unexpected breakup sealed those feelings in your heart and now for some reason that seal has broken and want to go out...

I say it is important that you express these emotions because you will regret it if you never have. But watch out... It will be best if your current partner understand, trust you and loves you enough and that this ex understand and can show you the unconditional friendship to let you do this...without any romatic expectations. It is all to help you find happines and growth in the life and future before you.