"Bye honey, see you tonight"

Those of you in a relationship/doomed -- err, I mean married -- I had a thought this glorious early morning. Now, that usually means a disaster is brewing or maybe a brain cell was harmed, but bear with me here, this could be fun. And funny.

How do you bid your better half farewell? As in going out/errands, going to work, etc, what do you say making your departure? And what, if anything, is said in return?

My husband makes a point of squeezing in a "Make sure the kids don't kill each other, please" or "Don't burn the house down if you try to cook" before his goodbye smooch, and I often follow it up with wry "Try not to have too much fun" and I go from there with a humorous ending to it to make him chuckle.
This morning, I made him snort pretty hard when I told him, "Try not to have too much fun. But tip the lunch break strippers well, they're working, too!"

I try to keep it changed up, "Don't kill anyone, you'll just have to hire new morons", "No office chair races on the floor!", "A little coc aine in the coffee should wake everyone right up!" (I do not actually endorse that idea, folks) And so forth. Always gets a good chuckle, and sometimes a hearty belly laugh

So how about you fine folks? Are you & yours "I love you, bye!" traditionalists, or do you let the wit & sarcasm flow?

Erm...

I heard that this works :

“Don’t forget to bring a baguette home dear or no wet celery whipping for you before midnight whilst I am wearing my fishing waders half filled with tepid custard after drawing circles around my nipples with that expensive lipstick that Father Christmas dropped down the chimney for you before falling on his arse into the hot embers, slugging down 3/4 of my best scotch and knocking the tree over scattering tinsel, balls and other Christmas goodies all over the living room floor!”

That Father Christmas is a right party animal.

Glad I am not Father Christmas... hard job methinks.

Hope this helps?

Anyone know where I can find ultra strong vit C and paracetamol quickly and biglie please before the children wake up?

Erm... to answer your question seriously : A texto works quite well saying “thank you for your attention” whilst wearing a pig mask and gripping a ball hammer in the other hand.

Lags

We are both retired. When we go out it is usually together.
Any tips on getting him out of the house where I could say see ya would be greatly appreciated.

originally posted by: Sillyolme
We are both retired. When we go out it is usually together.
Any tips on getting him out of the house where I could say see ya would be greatly appreciated.

See my post above.

Try wearing A Donald mask.. I believe that triggers people in your household my dear and should at least get YOU out of the house so hubs can breath?😩😩😃🤣😉😉

Humour off /

Have a good one with those you love Silly.

Kindest regards

Lagomorphe

a reply to: Nyiah



I usually pick one of our animals at random and as my wife sees me out I say, "You're in charge until I get back".

a reply to: Nyiah

I dont remember the last time I talked to my wife on the phone and the last thing we both said wasn't love you.

Same thing every time we leave.
Life is short and we both know that one day one of us might not come back if you know what I mean.

Neither of us want to live with the regret that the last time we spoke we didn't say live you.
Such a simple thing that do many take for granted.

a reply to: Lagomorphe

A donald mask could get me hurt. Or at least screamed at about everything hes... I'm.... doing wrong. LOL

I'm thinking of taking up BINGO.

a reply to: DBCowboy

My husband used to say that to our youngest son when he was an infant.... Something like You're the man of the house untilI get back...

originally posted by: Sillyolme
a reply to: Lagomorphe

A donald mask could get me hurt. Or at least screamed at about everything hes... I'm.... doing wrong. LOL

I'm thinking of taking up BINGO.

Donald Duck mask of course... with a big ugly ball hammer or axe...

When my husband leaves for work I always say, " love you B, drive safely, have a good night/day at work. ". When I leave he tells me he loves me, to be careful and to please come home with the same number of children I left with. Occasionally he will remind me to stay away from parallel parking or use my four wheel drive to get back up the driveway. We are boring people since we had children.

originally posted by: Kentuckymama
When my husband leaves for work I always say, " love you B, drive safely, have a good night/day at work. ". When I leave he tells me he loves me, to be careful and to please come home with the same number of children I left with. Occasionally he will remind me to stay away from parallel parking or use my four wheel drive to get back up the driveway. We are boring people since we had children.

And you don’t have a ball hammer to greet him with when he is late home?

Shame on you my dear!

We have a running joke where I tell him to be safe, watch out for kidnappers and Asian hookers (we live in super small town USA for the count) and I tell him he's my world and I love him with all I am.

He always says he loves me too and I'm his world.

5 years now and still honeymoon stage. Xxoo

a reply to: Bluntone22
"Love you babe", "Love you son" Mam/Bro/Sis etc are always my last words.
...for the same reasons you described

I usually just say I love you.

Which is why I haven’t really been on ATS that much as of late.

a reply to: Lagomorphe

Sorry. I'm hanging my head in shame! How could I forgot to do that?

We went through a phase of coming up with more elaborate OTT 'cute' names for each other, tongue in cheek though.

This backfired spectacularly when we in passing referred to each other as 'angel bunny pie' in public. Given our long standing in house joke, we didn't think anything of it, only to shortly realise her dad was looking at me as if I'd gone stark raving mad, haha.

a reply to: Lagomorphe

So those training courses Aug hosts weren't for naught, somebody did master some of the tricks!

originally posted by: Sillyolme
We are both retired. When we go out it is usually together.
Any tips on getting him out of the house where I could say see ya would be greatly appreciated.

Tell him there's a beer scavenger hunt with a sizable cache within a 20 square mile radius. That should keep him busy for a long while

originally posted by: Assemble
We went through a phase of coming up with more elaborate OTT 'cute' names for each other, tongue in cheek though.

This backfired spectacularly when we in passing referred to each other as 'angel bunny pie' in public. Given our long standing in house joke, we didn't think anything of it, only to shortly realise her dad was looking at me as if I'd gone stark raving mad, haha.

Mine called me Sugar Tits once in public, I think it just slipped out & he never really intended on saying it out & about.

Never the less, I've been calling him Honey Nuts in public ever since. Fair is fair!