Hysterical Airplane Captain Announcements

a reply to: Night Star

One!?!? I was expecting a compilation.

And I didn’t even laugh!

Tough crowd, eh??

As much as I applaud the cabin crew for trying to bring some happiness to a flight, I have to say airlines in general have made flying a positively MISERABLE experience! Sadly, the days of an enjoyable flight are long gone.

Seat pitch/rake (spacing) is ridiculous for anyone taller than about 5'-5". Seat width is tight for even an anorexic passenger and customer service is ZERO. The flight attendant did say one funny thing about the oxygen masks...that there would be no air. I'm just waiting for the airlines to tell you, you get a half a seat belt and for the other half you need to get out your VISA card, or the oxygen masks will drop, but if you want actual oxygen...you need to pay! And honestly, it wouldn't surprise me in the least to see any of these things actually happen!

I know it's just a fun video, and it was, but there's nothing "fun" or "funny" about flying anymore. Between the TSA, and the rude / greedy airlines...it's just a miserable experience.

P.S. - This, from a multi-million mile flier who spent the better part of 5 years in the air almost daily. Today, the most miserable thing I can think of is flying...even Business and 1st sucks now compared to what it used to be (and that's the only way I'll even fly now).

ETA - Sorry for being a party pooper.

a reply to: LookingForABetterLife

Glad you enjoyed it Blue!

a reply to: six67seven

Not even a chuckle?

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

That's ok Hun, I don't travel myself, so I have no experiences of flying in an airplane.

I had one last month that was "For the folks on the right side of the plane, you'll have a lovely view of center city Philadelphia. For the passengers on the left side of the plane, you'll have a lovely view of the passengers on the right side of the plane enjoying their view."

Was pretty dang funny at the time, as I usually get the very direct captains on flights. Although when you get them talking smack about their own airline because of a delay or early arrival, it's also kinda funny. I was flying to SFO two weeks ago and we were 35 minutes early and the captain came on and said "well everyone, we do not have a gate available to us because, well, we're American Airlines, what else do you expect?"

The pilots out of Charlotte are a funny bunch sometimes.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Tell me about it, I'm in the air a couple of times minimum every week and it just sucks. Although on business class flights on carriers like Etihad, Emirates, and a few Asian ones like JAL, it's actually a pretty decent experience as the quality of service and accommodation is light years ahead.

originally posted by: schuyler
Not to quibble too much, but that wasn't the Captain; it was likely the head flight attendant. Southwest is famous for this kind of stuff. Glad to see Frontier doing it, too. That will never happen on a Delta flight. They are the epitome of dull.

I was expecting to see a video of hearing the captain saying crazy things over the loudspeaker lol. As soon as I saw the preview image, I groaned...another one of these cheesy things.

Sorry, I know people love it but I can't help it. I absolutely hate this sort of thing. If it happened on a flight I was on, sure I could have a good time and enjoy it like everyone else. But, to record it and show other people?? What the hell is the matter with you people?! This is NOT RIGHT!

You havent heard the last of me! I'll put an end to this if its the last thing I do! You maniacs are going too far this time! You'll see!

originally posted by: Night Star
a reply to: chr0naut

Well, being an Elf, I just have to post this one...So cool!

You've redeemed yourself. Disaster averted.

For now. 😁

a reply to: Hypntick

Yeah, International is not too bad. Singapore is pretty great, but United and Malaysia pretty much suck.

There's just nothing good about domestic at all. In fact, the new strategy is to intentionally seat you in the absolute WORST possible seat on the aircraft, just so you'll pay for upgrades. It's not the CSA's faults, they're just doing the job the corporate machine has dictated to them. Hell, you could fly on a completely empty airplane and they'd seat you in a middle seat in the last row (no recliine) right in front of the lav. Now, granted the FA's would probably let you move once the door closed, but that's the new business model.

I did have one decent experience a while back though. I got on a United ride from DEN to DTW (Detroit) late one Friday night. Turned out it was an "equipment" ride. It's the only time in my life I wished I would have bought a coach seat, but they never tell you those things when you book. I was the only PAX on the aircraft. They had like 5 high mileage guys not show up, so that left just me. (who wants to go to Detroit on a Friday night, right?). They were just moving the equipment east so it would be available in the morning. The FA's let their hair down a little bit and it was actually a kind of fun flight (3 dinners and an open bar).

Now if that would have been Delta it would have been a whole different ballgame with the aircraft jammed wall to wall with stranded SA's and BP-8's trying to get somewhere, but on UA it was an up-station flight away from a hub. The thing which made it all the more funny was it was a wingtip flight which left 10 minutes later than it's sister. I walked by the gate and saw all the people, and just kept walking to the wingtip further down the concourse. Heh, I guess no one wanted to walk that far. And the icing on the cake was we actually got there first!