How to handle single life?

originally posted by: BotheLumberJack

Stairway to Heaven? Whatcha tryin to say there Bo diddly

Why would you continue to live in a part of the World that is not going to give you the fulfillment you need? No one in Europe is going to care about your American views on marriage, sorry.

You're in the wrong country + part of the World. America, Canada, Hell, even the English...Know what "marriage" actually means.

Besides, Fk Europe.

a reply to: Bluesma

Get a pet.

a reply to: SR1TX

Europe is very marriage-centric, despite what you think. It is part of the so-called westernised-world. Not everyone is a savage.

originally posted by: JugHead
a reply to: Bluesma

Rotten that is.

I hear parasites have something to do with how behavior works, nasty buggers can wreak havoc when not disposed of, and it's more common than one might think. One example is a cat with parasites known to transfer them to mice, changing how mice think and react to the point where the mice will go towards the predator instead of away from it thinking it's safe when it's not.

Toxoplasmosis is one of the most common parasitic diseases in cats. This infection is caused by the Toxoplasma gondii parasite. Toxoplasmosis can affect many animals, including humans. ... Most often, this occurs when cats eat mice or rats infected with the parasite.Mar 30, 2018

If that can happen to animals it can happen to the human animal, us.

What i'm saying is, if people are full of worms and other parasitic bugs, never filtering it out for 40-50 years you're talking about an infestation causing disease mind confusion and behavioral problems. Some people used to take Gum spirits of turpentine for this, which is shunned now due to greedy corps.

Lol....you are absolutely correct ….. I might add that MJ is an all-round anti-parasitic if ingested properly....as is to a much less or minor degree Alcohol,both are medicinal in nature with socially desirable side-effects if one uses them incorrectly and imbibes more than is required to maintain good health by killing parasites.Hulda Clark is an excellent resource for learning about parasites and their connections to all diseases....a massive component of addictive behaviours is parasitic encouragement....something either directly related to or within the periphery of and milking benefits is catalysing self-destructive behaviours....SOMETHING must be benefitting from a human damaging itself.


How to handle single life beyond 50 is simple math....how many years do you hope for and how many of those will you get if you lop off 5 years for unexpected health issues or accidents et al ...just to level things out.....and then with your remaining years how many do you wish to be happy ones and how many do you wish to be sad ones.....they say that if you wish to travel fast travel alone and if you wish to travel far travel with others...might be something to that.

a reply to: Bluesma

Well, for whatever it's worth, I'd gladly take ya out to dinner, BUT I'm horribly rough around the edges, broken down and just a terrible person. Ugly too. Cowboy and all (but you knew that). I expect we'd argue, but it would be fun; at least you can put up a good debate. Only problem is the 'different continents' issue. Oh well.

I can guarantee there'd be no romance cuz I'd have to go read a book or something to figure that out (again).

In any case, girl, don't despair...I'm sure there's a guy out there you'll like someday.

You know, sometimes, it's not all about sex, but rather just personal touch.

You'll be fine.

a reply to: Bluesma

I've been through something similar (though I've got 2/3rds of my life to find someone again). First of all, I'm sorry you had to go through with the ex business. I'd be hesitant to let him back into the equation, as until he makes the effort to get better for himself, he would be bad news coming back into your life.

Seeing as I can't speak for the above-40 crowd, I'll instead tell you this tale. My parents divorced a long time ago (So far back I can't even say what year it was). Neither have remarried, but my dad's story is a little interesting: For years after, he wouldn't attempt to look for someone else. What helped him is that he found a passion for cooking: He was able to experiment with recipes, make treats for us, and even cook us dinner that deserved a fancy restaurant.

To combat the loneliness, he'd go on mini day trips somewhere, do sudoku puzzles, cook, and on occasion, invite all of us out to see him (If he was home, then we could visit anytime he wasn't sleeping). Right now, he's friends with a female coworker of his, and while I don't think they will ever get married, they have a great platonic relationship.

Does he get lonely? Yes - he's had to deal with the "empty nest syndrome" since I learned to fly, but I still make sure to call him every week.

The best bit of advice I got from him through all this was: Don't expect the loneliness and happiness to come back all at once; It'll take a while to enjoy being single.

If you ever need to chat, feel free to drop me a message: What helps the most with loneliness is talking to someone

Get a Nintendo Switch

So many replies! I can't respond personally to each one, but I would like to!
I am babysitting my three month old grandaughter.
Time with gurging smiling babies seems to help?

I got a kitten. He's cuddly, but I had forgotten how kittens have such sharp claws and teeth and love jumping on your feet in the middle of the night!
I have our dog some days - we have shared custody. He goes running with me in the morning. He stays here when ex has his nights out. He is limiting himself to prostitutes now, considers it somehow less degrading. But he drives all the way to Spain which is two hours. It is sad. I'd rather see him going out with guy friends to meet women, actually! But he has dropped all his previous hobbies and interests. He used to be a happy guy ten years ago, then the secret shame made him tyrannic, narcissistic, irritable... now that it is out his shame is just evident.

But I didn't mean to write my post about him, his path is his. I have to constantly fight off waves of healer-type urges, that ride along top of my anxious attachment style.

For those that asked why I am staying here -
I almost went back to California. My stepfather offered to have me stay at his home. But I have three kids here, and three grandkids! It is really for them I stayed. Though there are days I am seriously still considering it. At the time my daughter was pregnant and got really distressed because of the whole revelation about her father, so I wanted to support her emotionally. She is still not doing well - she is depressed, but just started seeing a therapist. If she starts to pick herself up I still might leave France.

Yes, French people marry. They just (in the majority) don't consider infidelity that big a deal and don't divorce over it. They also don't really think complete honesty is ever a good idea in any relationship. There's some more complex cultural differences that don't work for me and make communication too difficult.

Baby Charlize is awake _ gotta go. Thank you all so much ! Im leaving this thread open on my browser so I can read it again for inspiration and take notes!!

a reply to: KTemplar

Thanks for the laugh.

a reply to: SlapTheGinkels

Poor guy, your brothers wife sounds like my brothers wife, the wicked witch of the west. He can't walk 10 feet outside his door without his dumb blonde wife knowing about it, let alone have one beer without her.

a reply to: Bluesma

Bluesma your ex sounds like a douche bag of the first order to have treated you the way he did , Enjoy being single and get a horse again from the photo you had as your avatar on the horse you are one pretty lady -his loss .

It will get easier over time , you have plenty of family and friends and hobbies to keep you going and at the end of the day you are better of without someone in your life who you cannot trust

a reply to: stonerwilliam

I still have my horse that I have had for 15 years, but I cant afford to keep her. I am trying to find someone to give her to that I can trust won't just take her to the butcher for money.

He's sick and has problems....I'm sure I'll find someone else eventually, with whom I can be very happy. I guess I'm remembering how to be happy all by myself.
I'm saying that, but I kinda feel like I have been doing that for years, since my ex was never home and emotionally unavailable when he was there! I was coping through meditation, doing exercise alone, reading and writing....Now that I think about it, I'm actually relearning how to enjoy social life and bonds again, leaving behind my isolation.

My kids are sort of irritating me because they are worried I am suddenly being too wild (not mother-like was the term ) because I go out dancing or to dinner parties and concerts with girlfriends. I listened to their concerns, then told them, you'll have to just suck it up. I did my job as mom and wife. You don't need me so intensely focused on you and your needs anymore!

I didn't even tell them I went hiking by myself, found a wonderful beach on the shore of a river, and got stoned by myself. Felt like being 20 again!

Despite some down days, I must admit that there is a lot of good coming around too.

a reply to: Bluesma

You will meet someone when you least expect it ,just like hunting for the car keys wreck the house looking for them and they turn up when you give up ! .

You have a active social & family life Mr wright will come along just like those keys you just have to believe and be patient , glad to hear you still have the horse but i can understand the concern with the veterinary bills etc i had 4 long time ago , they are money pits when they get older and take a lot of time out of life which i did not have at the time .

Glad to see you have taken to walking the beach having a little smoke to unwind from life that is one of my guilty pleasures walking the dog on the beach getting stoned before i have to go back to humanity , You have to do something for me the next time you are dog sitting wind the Ex up hide the dog with a neighbor when he is due to pick it up and tell him you had it put to sleep at the vets to wind him up , just to see his face

Best of luck to you pretty lady

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