Long Distance Relationships

People always mention the negative things that can happen in a long term relationship but never the positive. I believe if both parties are committed, a long term relationship will only make them stronger and less vulnerable to break ups.

Of course you have to look at the negatives. People change over time, that's the way it is. Best friends will become strangers.

Nothing is certain in life...no relationship is 100% garaunteed...be you living together or living apart.

Is a relationship easier to maintain when you are actually face to face?? Of course it is. For you have immediacy, availability...immediate intimacy. When together, if you wanted to tell your partner you love them, touch them to show your love...then its as easy as turning your head or reaching out to them.

Can LDRs work?? Of course they can...its just generally a whole lot more difficult than face to face. Like has been said, it requires a level of commitment way beyond that of 'normal' relationships...it requires an undying focus and faith in the love you have for the other...and it requires much energy, as well as action...

...the bottom line is that if both partners want it to work out, and are willing to go to whatever lengths needed to make it work...then it WILL work. If not, well, it matters not if they are 5 feet or 5 thousand miles apart...it will never work.



Peace,
ALIEN

judging by the sheer amounts of navy wives i've slept with.... nope

Originally posted by alien
Nothing is certain in life...no relationship is 100% garaunteed...be you living together or living apart.

Is a relationship easier to maintain when you are actually face to face?? Of course it is. For you have immediacy, availability...immediate intimacy. When together, if you wanted to tell your partner you love them, touch them to show your love...then its as easy as turning your head or reaching out to them.

Can LDRs work?? Of course they can...its just generally a whole lot more difficult than face to face. Like has been said, it requires a level of commitment way beyond that of 'normal' relationships...it requires an undying focus and faith in the love you have for the other...and it requires much energy, as well as action...

...the bottom line is that if both partners want it to work out, and are willing to go to whatever lengths needed to make it work...then it WILL work. If not, well, it matters not if they are 5 feet or 5 thousand miles apart...it will never work.



Peace,
ALIEN

Couldn't say it better myself. He's got it down. Just depends if you two can handle it.

I was in a long distance relationship for almost 2 years. She was in Kansas and I in California. I finaly moved out to the mid-west and am getting marriedin two weeks!

We almost didn't make it and there were times when I wanted to give up but now that I'm here I'm glad I made the right choice.

As someone who has been in a long distance realtionship I have to say that I think they dont work. People change. You meet new people. I mean how can you have a relationship with someone if you're never with them? I dont think they work.

Originally posted by AkulA
I was in a long distance relationship for almost 2 years. She was in Kansas and I in California. I finaly moved out to the mid-west and am getting marriedin two weeks!

We almost didn't make it and there were times when I wanted to give up but now that I'm here I'm glad I made the right choice.

GO YOU!!!

Congratulations on the upcoming wedding...may happiness be your morning sun and contentment be your rising moon...


Peace,
ALIEN

Originally posted by Pocket
sometimes contact via e-mail and telephone makes you miss each other even more.. Does that make sense.

It's frustrating.

Yeah. I've done this and it does make you miss the other person more, but like the poster said...you have to keep in constant contact...

Yes, a big congratulations on the wedding!!!

Thank you all so much for your thoughts and suggestions. I can see you all have very different views on the subject.

I myself believe they can work, I guess it all depends how much you want it to and how much effort you put in.

Yes, it is extremely difficult when you don't see each other, but you have to remember just how great everything is when you do.

Thanks again for you contribution.

Pocket

Who knows if they work or not, even people that have been in a long distance relationships that are now together, doesn't mean they will stay together...!

They have work so far for some people..?

I beleive that only work for so long, the same as any other relationship...the minute you take it for granted and the day you have to try and make somebody else happy without it coming natutal is the day you walk away.....!


My opinion...

Thanks for your opinion Boomhaur.

I am an experienced LDR master. And I love my girl. She lives in eastern Europe I live in Western Europe. We are at least once every year together, sometimes more often.

But we are "together" for almost 4 years. Oh yes it is difficult sometimes, and I'm sure a LDR won't work for everyone. Oh yeah sure I do miss physical contact but you get used to it.

We keep good contact, I call at least once every week for about 30min. and we often send sms's to eachother. I have to admit that it sometimes like as if our relationship is fading, but it is not... when we meet eachother again, it's just more excited and better with more love and passion because we really care for eachother. We are "soulmates" we don't have to be together everyday to love eachother.

And it can work only if you want it to work, that's all... no matter what they tell you, just follow your own feeling pocket. If you have any questions about it ? just ask me, or send a u2u. I hope I can answer it, in fact I'd like to talk about it with someone because I've had times that I was really about to quit the whole thing...
But after all I'm very happy I had the faith to make it work.

One thing you should never do is to listen to others about this, they don't know that every realtionship is unique, it takes 2 to keep it going on. Even in non LDR's. Or what about the relation of a busy businessman ? That's almost the same as a LDR ..

But anyway, love is more than "having a crush on someone" true love has no limits.

Once I've told my girl that even if I had to go to the moon that won't change my love for her, no matter where I am in this universe, she'll always be in my heart.

[Edited on 8-7-2003 by TigeriS]

Originally posted by TigeriS
Once I've told my girl that even if I had to go to the moon that won't change my love for her, no matter where I am in this universe, she'll always be in my heart.

...thats beautiful man...your lady is lucky indeed to have love like that...giving you a much deserved Applaud for that...best of luck man...




Peace,
ALIEN

WODDY, POCKET...READING TOO MUCH INTO IT

Too Pocket...

I'm lying alone with my head on the phone
Thinking of you till it hurts
I know you hurt too
But what else can we do
Tormented and torn apart
I wish I could carry your smile in my heart
For times when my life feels so low
It would make me believe
What tomorrow could bring
When today doesn't really know
Doesn't really know

I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong
I want you to come back and carry me home
Away from these long lonely nights
I'm reaching for you, are you feeling it too
Does the feeling seem oh so right
And what would you say if I called on you now
And said that I can't hold on
There's no easy way, it gets harder each day
Please love me or I'll be gone
I'll be gone

Oh Boomhaur,

That is lovely.

I love you so much. I cherish the time we are together. I know we cant be together everyday, but just the thought of seeing you keeps me going

Thank you for loving me

Pocket x

Originally posted by boomhaur

Too Pocket...

I'm lying alone with my head on the phone
Thinking of you till it hurts
I know you hurt too
But what else can we do
Tormented and torn apart
I wish I could carry your smile in my heart
For times when my life feels so low
It would make me believe
What tomorrow could bring
When today doesn't really know
Doesn't really know

I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong
I want you to come back and carry me home
Away from these long lonely nights
I'm reaching for you, are you feeling it too
Does the feeling seem oh so right
And what would you say if I called on you now
And said that I can't hold on
There's no easy way, it gets harder each day
Please love me or I'll be gone
I'll be gone

I hate that cheezy so called song

Well it wasn't written down for YOU to read was it!

I happen to like it.

[Edited on 8-7-2003 by Pocket]

No really whats the point of those birds with big egos who want to get on MTV?

Yeah just because some talanless bimbo wants to be famous, her musics crap so what she does she wiggles her arse and tits a bit and producers say - woooooo guys will wonna watch it , and abracadabra, she makes those cheezy songs, one after another that polute the airwaves.

Yeah, Air Supply did kick some good ones out in those days...sigh.

regards
seekerof

[Edited on 8-7-2003 by Seekerof]