Introverts versus extroverts: Who's better off?

originally posted by: antiantonym
There is a simple belief that I have that relates to this topic.

The less needs one has, the better off they are.

I would say if a person could live like the Tom Hanks character in the film Castaway without feeling lonely (while being happy), they would probably be the strongest person alive. Of course, that character did seem lonely. That's why he made an imaginary friend out of a volleyball.

www.youtube.com...

That example kind of illustrates why I equate introversion with strength. Not needing others is the ultimate sign of strength to me.

I can't see extroversion as being anything but weakness. I'm not putting it down by the way. I have some of that in myself. I've found that I can go about three months without socializing (outside of the Internet) before it starts affecting my level of happiness. I usually fall into a sudden depression after about three months of no such socializing. I'm a fairly extreme introvert, but I wish I didn't need to do any socializing.

I see relying on others as weakness.

I used to be fairly introverted, I suppose I still am a lot of the time but I've tried to get over my belief that needing others is a weakness. Human's need each other. We're social creatures. There's still a lot of days I don't want to talk to anybody but I've found I've started enjoying just talking to people more. Personally, I find it way harder to be extroverted and actually open up to people. It takes a special kind of strength to not need anybody and i believe everyone needs to learn how to be alone, but I don't think people that need other people are weak and I think everyone that thinks they don't need anyone needs to learn to talk to people at least a little bit. I've spent a lot of time alone in my life and I've really come to appreciate the people that for some reason have decided to stick around. I've also come to appreciate the few people in my day that are generally happy to see me and talk to me for a little bit or even the random crazies that seem to enjoy talking to me.

originally posted by: antiantonym
There is a simple belief that I have that relates to this topic.

The less needs one has, the better off they are.

I would say if a person could live like the Tom Hanks character in the film Castaway without feeling lonely (while being happy), they would probably be the strongest person alive.

Hard to imagine what life would be like without a language to "think" in.

So, at least for the early part of our life, we need to be more extrovert, and interact with people.

After we've learned what we need from extroverted interactions, we can "withdraw" into ourselves and become introverts.

But, if we start out as introvert, then we won't even be able to formulate thoughts.

We wouldn't even know we're introverts.

a reply to: AMPTAH

Human babies are the most helpless creatures on Earth. They need help for everything. That's why they appear to be extroverts no matter what. You can say the same thing for people with lots of crippling diseases. Needing constant help to survive does not mean you're an extrovert. An introverted soul in a baby's body will act the same way an extroverted soul in a baby's body would act. I would think that wouldn't change until a person reaches self-awareness because that's when one starts to gain control over their life. I believe that's around 5 years old. That's when I started pulling away from people. I remember not wanting to leave my home because of my introversion around that age.

We learn language because our survival depends on it. Extroverts and introverts are in the same boat there.

You made me realize something important. Extroverts are kind of akin to babies in that they're always essentially crying for attention. The two situations are not the same however. Babies need attention to survive. Extroverts need attention to feel happy.

One thing I've learned from this thread is that there's a correlation between being an extrovert being a sheeple. That makes me perfect sense because extroverts are like beggars. They have to plead for attention from whomever is around them. Consequently, they have to stoop to the level of whomever is around them to "fit in."

Extroverts are weak no matter how you slice it in my view.

originally posted by: darkbake
There are advantages to both, extraverts will benefit from more social connections and networking, thus gaining opportunities for trade (of information through conversation, or maybe swapping favors) and even job opportunities. I learn a lot about new video games, shows, technology, ideas to improve my home life, and more.

Introverts can socialize and network as much as they want. I don't see any reason to think extroverts have the "advantages" you mentioned necessarily. They sometimes can, but introverts can easily socialize and network as much as they want.

In my view, the disadvantages of socializing and networking outway the advantages. You didn't mention the disadvantages such as bringing yourself down to the level of others to "fit in" (women who wear makeup because their friends do), wasting time on silly issues to get down to the level of whomever is around you (such as being forced to discuss pop culture because those around you are only interested in that), and being forced to behave in ways that are harmful to you to "fit in" (such as being pressured into using drugs).

a reply to: antiantonym

You forgot the people that are introverts in real life and then extroverts online.

originally posted by: JAGStorm
a reply to: antiantonym

You forgot the people that are introverts in real life and then extroverts online.

That's quite easy to do for the same reason that people can type horribly abusive and nasty things to one another. The actual human is removed. It' easy to talk to someone when you aren't actually talking to someone.

a reply to: ketsuko

I'm an observer, too. It comes to me naturally but also helped in my sales career.

I have learned to turn on and off at will. I do find extended social situations tiring these days. That is, unless there is stimulating, intelligent conversation with interesting people. Joined college alumni group that keeps me on my toes and they actually have enlightening knowledge, usually. Of course, sometimes you have to deal with big egos; such a bore. (similar to some on here).

originally posted by: MindBodySpiritComplex
Fellow introvert here. I don't see it through the lense of X vs Y. Important is to recognize yourself for what you are and act accordingly. I am in my late forties now and only started reading about introvert/extrovert traits about eight or nine years ago after doing a Myers Briggs personality test on the web. That was quite eye opening for me as it confirmed so many things about me.

I stopped worrying about not being compatible with the mostly extrovert expectations and ideals of western society. Together with my equally introverted wife we now lead a mostly recluse/hermit couple life. We are each others best friends and are quite happy to only every now and then meet other people.

Before we started living like that about ten years ago I would often torment myself about "not feeling it" when invited to parties or other group events even if I liked the individuals that would be present there. Now that I embraced my introvert nature I am so much happier.

We both definitely are happy with very little and only work to live - not the other way around.

Well said, and a beautiful example of learning to take cares of one's psyche.
Seems like we don't "choose" to be introverted/extroverted, it's more a general description of how much social interaction we want/need.
If that is so: then judging one as best, (the one we are), is an ego-trap.
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im a big time extorvert. if i was rich i would buy a building and let all my friends live there for free, and we have a common art space on floor level to collab on.

that being said, introverts have a 'super power' to me. i know people that do not have to leave the house for a few days. they are 'content' to stay home and work.

as an artist, DAMN i wish i felt like this.

im a starving artist, full on artist block, because i would rather be out doing stuff than sitting home at a desk...

originally posted by: dantanna

im a starving artist, full on artist block, because i would rather be out doing stuff than sitting home at a desk...

So then, never leave home without a camera.

And while you're out, "take pictures" of scenes where you spot some artistic value appearing.

Then, when you get back home, review those pics, and construct some art based on what your eye saw as important while you were "out there."

That should "remove the block."

a reply to: antiantonym

Your thread is something of a challenge, rarely do people of both varying degrees agree but i'll make the exception this once and choose both. Your name antiantonym means anti friend.

I assume you knew this though. There's a lot here to digest so one post at a time for me.

a reply to: antiantonym

Interesting question I think.
I don't know that either is 'better off' in my opinion.
Thinking of my children which could be described as Snow White and Rose Red (not the disney version) one is very extroverted and is quite social and in that, it makes her happy and she wants to be involved and experience the world in every way.
My other daughter, introverted even before she was sick, prefers to study and be alone in her world and thoughts. She is learned in areas that my other daughter is not.
Interesting to note, anecdotal of course, the extroverted one is so much more inclined academically and the introverted one more inclined artistically.
I'm very excited to see where they land.

I am an extrovert all the way. I love learning someone's story. What they've done, who they are, things that they have learned.

In a duality like we live in, all we have are relationships. It's how I know me. Who I am is reflected back to me when i look into you.

Not saying I don't need some recharge time every now and then.

Considering that each individual is different and unique, I cannot say whether or not introverts are "better off" than extroverts, or visa versa.

There are many misconceptions about introversion and varying degrees at which people experience it in their lives.

In my opinion, introversion is a unique personality trait and a gift. One that each individual has different experiences with.