To whom it may concern,

Will your absence be felt and leave holes in their hearts, or will the sound of your departure be music to their ears? Do you ever ask yourself these questions? As much as I want to believe I'd rather disappear and fade into obscurity, human nature is there to remind me I care more than I'll ever admit. We all want to be valued in one way or another, it's what drives us to be better people. And whether we'd like to admit it or not, we all have a bit of narcissism embedded into our DNA, some like to call it identity. It's fairly easy to fool other people, but only a fool is capable of lying to themselves. At what cost does giving up pieces of yourself become too expensive? Just hope you don't become a shell of who you are by chasing the mirage of who you want to be. Don't wait for approval and praise to create a false sense of security, embracing the things in which you choose to disregard and avoid are what truly empowers you.


Find yourself...

a reply to: knowledgehunter0986


I have found myself.
A life is only as fulfilling as you make it and that is judged by the people you surround yourself with.
My wife and child make me want to be better.

a reply to: knowledgehunter0986

Knowledgehunter,

I wasn't sure at first if your words were borne of bitterness or concern for others (or perhaps both)? I have no doubt that my absence would create a void to those I love and others who have been In my life. I believe we're all born into the energy of a collective consciousness and any absence would be felt, some positively and most mournfully. I've personally tried to live my life by the golden rule "do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. I've role modeled that principle for my children and have watched them grow into kind and caring people. Is it narcisstic to want others to recognize you for your positive traits or your achievements? I don't think so as long as it's not tied to others feeling belittled or a lacking of positivity about themself.

I also think that your words reflect an extremely important message, especially to the young or others not comfortable in their own shoes or who think that the shoes of another would feel more gratifying. I hope the warning your message conveys has not been the result of personal disappointment; your words convey love and should be recognized as such.

a reply to: knowledgehunter0986

What is this drivel you 've written here which sounds like conceited bullying . Are you scared of breaking the rules by attacking a certain member directly ? That'd be , well ... pathetic . Tell me that is not the case

No one will miss my bones. that's a given. Only by the lack of noise I make, will people wonder, then forget.

not all of us have worth. like clouds, we may notice one that looks interesting, but on the way forwards we forget it.

I'll be a pile of decay in a chair, before only the stench causes someone to look. and bring it on, I'm so over this circus.

a reply to: Bluntone22

So without them you wouldn't?

I've been told over and over that it is ourselves that needs to be content, before we can be content with others. To which my constant reply has been, we are not meant to be islands, it is who we are surrounded by, that gives us happiness.

and told I am wrong.

We need others to be complete. some of us don't have that, but it's always those that do, who pontificate and tell us otherwise. Like a rich person saying money doesn't buy happiness... and as Alan from two and a have men replied "I wouldn't know, I've never had either."

a reply to: timidgal

Hey timidgal,

Oh no, this was all done with love, not an ounce of bitterness on my part at all. I'm just in a creative zone at the moment and I enjoy writing.

Interesting you mentioned the young, because I actually work with many teens and they definitely gave me some inspiration while writing this.

Thanks for reading,

a reply to: GeneralMayhem

Concieted bullying? Maybe you should read over my OP a couple more times until the message hits you and you don't feel that way


Scared to call out a member? You obviously don't know me.

a reply to: badw0lf

I can only speak about how I feel.
We are all different.
I will say that a person that never feels content will probably never be happy.

I'm 90% on the boat to fading into obscurity and 10% .. not.

I'm actually not too concerned with a personal legacy. In fact, if that 10% somehow wins out and I do things the way I desire, no one will ever be sure I've done anything at all. Don't know why that appeals to me so strongly, but it seems like some things grow more effectively outside of a framework of personality from the originator. Of course, that leaves it wide open for someone else to latch on, manipulate, and take credit since that really does seem to be some sort of innate human quality.

*shrugs*

a reply to: knowledgehunter0986

Searched far and wide. Searched deeeeeeeeeeeep. Found nothing.

Blessings for you, for posting this thread.

a reply to: knowledgehunter0986

Find yourself...

Know Thyself...

...we all have a bit of narcissism embedded into our DNA, some like to call it identity.

I personally call it Ego, and I embrace it, for it is the vehicle to manifesting through righteousness.

It's fairly easy to fool other people, but only a fool is capable of lying to themselves.

I agree. We each only know what we truly believe and probably think it could be kept secret and not revealed, but we each reveal our beliefs all the time. The life we each lead is a composite of all our thoughts and beliefs. If you want to know what another truly believes — just look at the life they have created for themselves thus far.

...embracing the things in which you choose to disregard and avoid are what truly empowers you.

Stepping out of one's own comfort zone is always a good step to take.

a reply to: Involutionist

Good to see you back Invo

My husband, my son, a few friends.

Other than that, I've never really thought about it. Maybe people will. Maybe they won't.

I'm no social butterfly, and I am happiest when left alone. That doesn't lend itself to making an impact.

a reply to: ketsuko

I think for the most part, most of us are introverts. I think you have to be to end up on a site like this.

It's weird, both my jobs are highly social and intimate and I can deal with anywhere from 20-50 different people a month, but I don't consider myself a social butterfly and thrive best (and prefer to be) alone.


I think the message I was trying to convey was, and to paraphrase a quote -- the longest journey one can take is the one from the head to the heart. Everyone goes through life differently, but the journey to find oneself ultimately starts and ends with you.

a reply to: knowledgehunter0986

Glad to hear it, Knowledgehunter! If I didnt say it before, it was a very well-written, thought provoking post. Have a great day!

The close family and the few closest friends I believe they will miss me. Like I will miss them. I have a great family and sometimes I even feel I don't quite deserve them.

Yet I wouldn't want to leave a hole in their heart. Yes, there is pain when someone close to us leave, but I would want them to accept my departing as a natural fact of life and go on and be happy with their life. I would like my partner to be able to find somebody who will make him happy; I would like my children to follow my best advices and avoid my worst mistakes, yet live their lives by their own rules, not mine. I always told them life is yours to discover, don't imitate nobody.
And my biggest hope is that my legacy for them is that life is not easy but there is love, and hope and magic in it, and they will be able to find those things in their own lives.

Funny thing, I even have a little poem I found online and I told them to put it on my stone grave. This is what I believe and this is how I want them to think of me.

"Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there, I did not die."

a reply to: timidgal

Thanks, I really appreciate the feedback. I'm still learning.

a reply to: WhiteHat

Great reply and great poem.

One thing I learned, the best way to teach somebody is to lead by example. You don't demand change, you inspire it.

And it sound like you have your heart in the right place, so I'm sure your kids will do just great.

As far as I am concerned probably not. I can only truly attest to the ones that I have loved that are gone now. It definitely left a hole in my heart.