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It has happened. The unthinkable. The nightmare has begun.

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posted on Jul, 13 2017 @ 07:22 PM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

On further thought, we should team up to get him away from this diet nonsense. You, DB, BFFT, and myself could fight crime as the Fatasstic Four.



posted on Jul, 13 2017 @ 07:22 PM
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originally posted by: burdman30ott6
Well, after he perishes due to malnutrition and starvation, his wife can pick up his crime fighting tasks under the identity of Blunderwoman.


The only crime DB ever fought was that of eating pizza with a fork. And I commend him for that.



posted on Jul, 13 2017 @ 07:23 PM
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originally posted by: burdman30ott6
On further thought, we should team up to get him away from this diet nonsense. You, DB, BFFT, and myself could fight crime as the Fatasstic Four.


That would be the Fantastic Six if you count DB properly.



posted on Jul, 13 2017 @ 07:23 PM
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originally posted by: DBCowboy
I skipped second supper tonight and could feel my ribs.

Then I realized that I still had BBQ in one of my folds.


Not even your own metabolism will consume your excess fat without first putting a sauce on it... does your wife realize the Herculean task she's put in front of you both?



posted on Jul, 13 2017 @ 07:25 PM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: burdman30ott6
Well, after he perishes due to malnutrition and starvation, his wife can pick up his crime fighting tasks under the identity of Blunderwoman.


The only crime DB ever fought was that of eating pizza with a fork. And I commend him for that.


Not true, he's fighting crime in Seattle. www.npr.org...



posted on Jul, 13 2017 @ 07:25 PM
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a reply to: burdman30ott6

I have the metabolism of a gazelle.

Braised in a Cajun sweet sauce.



posted on Jul, 13 2017 @ 07:26 PM
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originally posted by: burdman30ott6

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: burdman30ott6
Well, after he perishes due to malnutrition and starvation, his wife can pick up his crime fighting tasks under the identity of Blunderwoman.


The only crime DB ever fought was that of eating pizza with a fork. And I commend him for that.



Not true, he's fighting crime in Seattle. www.npr.org...



The horror. . . .

The horror. . . . . . . . .

edit on 13-7-2017 by DBCowboy because: (no reason given)



posted on Jul, 13 2017 @ 07:41 PM
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a reply to: IAMTAT



I felt it. And no, AM is nowhere around.



posted on Jul, 13 2017 @ 07:43 PM
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I found this in the editing suite, some of your audio recordings from the the pilot reality show "BargeArse" I did with you.

It was never green lit. The studio heads were repulsed by the first scene; "donut dreaming" sequence



Don't lose too much DB flavour.



posted on Jul, 13 2017 @ 08:07 PM
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originally posted by: Mousygretchen
a reply to: DBCowboy

Bah! Let's hope she puts you on a variety of fruits and vegetables.


Like this?



posted on Jul, 13 2017 @ 08:13 PM
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originally posted by: zazzafrazz

originally posted by: Mousygretchen
a reply to: DBCowboy

Bah! Let's hope she puts you on a variety of fruits and vegetables.


Like this?


To be fair, that was taken after a yoga class.

Ok, it wasn't a yoga class.

It was after I bent over to pick up some cheese at Walmart.

But I was still tired!



posted on Jul, 14 2017 @ 07:44 AM
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originally posted by: kosmicjack
And no, AM is nowhere around.


He will be in October. And he wants beer.



posted on Jul, 14 2017 @ 08:52 AM
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This has pineapple in it. Would that still be a no no?



posted on Jul, 14 2017 @ 08:57 AM
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a reply to: Skid Mark

Just looking at the picture is making him fatter.



posted on Jul, 14 2017 @ 09:17 AM
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DB...after reading all of these, all I can think about is 'no booze'. Seriously? Man cannot live on bread alone. Ditch the bitch.



posted on Jul, 14 2017 @ 09:32 AM
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a reply to: Notional

Holy crazy first post, Fatman. This thread is pulling people out of the woodwork.

I love that someone who registered 10 years ago decided to bomb your thread.






edit on 14-7-2017 by AugustusMasonicus because: I ♥ cheese pizza.



posted on Jul, 14 2017 @ 11:28 AM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

People are enjoying my suffering.

Guess I deserve it since I've caused so much.




posted on Jul, 14 2017 @ 01:38 PM
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originally posted by: DBCowboy
People are enjoying my suffering.

Guess I deserve it since I've caused so much.


You certainly did, the couch cushions have never been the same.



posted on Jul, 14 2017 @ 01:44 PM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

I didn't know I'd leave stretch marks on your couch.

I said I'd buy a new one!



posted on Jul, 14 2017 @ 01:59 PM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus
From farting?



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