MAN-ifesto - the meninist movement

We are fed up with feminism, particularly third-wave feminists who tried feminism and now don't want to stop doing feminism.

As men, we've been biting our tongues for far too long, so its time we played them at their game by making absurd and unfair demands that benefit men more than they do women. I've drawn up a simple man-ifesto which outlines some of our basic demands.

1. Nobody is allowed to say Mother and Father, or Mum and Dad, but to say Father and Mother or Dad and Mum, instead.

2. Womens are to lower the toilet seat before they use it and lift it back to its original resting place when they're finished.

3. Women can go out and work, men are better cooks, anyway - so they can stay at home and 'man' the kitchen - in fact, men are better around the house in general, not just at cooking but painting, decorating, all home improvements. They also govern the television, PC's, laptops and games consoles better than women.

4. If men are cold, women should give them their coat, and possibly a handbag. Maybe even some makeup to keep their faces warm.

5. Men want to give birth. We've been denied this right since day one and it's unfair.

6. We want to rollerblade through a fountain while singing about sanitary products.

7. We're sick of being the sexually aggressive ones, we want women to chase us...to lust over us. They should be begging for us, we have what they want and we should exploit it.

8. We're sick of Queen Elizabeth, she's had a good run but it's about time a real man was given a shot of the title...we want Harry as king.

9. We're sick of men being portrayed as fools in films and television when we're the ones mostly making these films and tv shows in the first place. Any man who mocks another man, even just in a gentle way, for a laugh, should be beaten senseless.


We did want to have 10 separate demands but we started to struggle at about 3 and thought we were pushing it a bit. What say you?

a reply to: HeathenJessie

This country is a free country. People are going to believe things you disagree with.

Personally I get where you're coming from, but most people including women don't give much thought to what any extremist says.

They a purposefully being controversial so that when people respond it creates a discussion and gives them a platform to distribute their ideas.

I think you're taking this far to seriously.

Edit: by declaring a Man-ifesto you're also feeding and semi validating their claims.

a reply to: HeathenJessie

Haha number 6 is awesome

Good luck with your campaign, I wanted to join but my wife said I can't

The wife already knows she has to put the toilet seat down in order to pee. If she wants me to put it down I won't guarantee it will be dry.

a reply to: HeathenJessie


















I'm in as long as the wife doesn't find out

a reply to: HeathenJessie

1. I'm fine with that.
2. I can't agree with this one. I was the only female in my home. I had to have something.
3. I'm already living that dream
4. No, but I will share. The coat. I don't wear makeup, so he will have to buy his own.
5. WINNER!!!! Please do. No puking, stretchmarks, looking like big bird? It's all yours darling.
6. You want to have to use them too? I'm good with that.
7. Done, but you better not say you have a headache.
8. I'm not British, but I'm all for it.
9. Well grow a pair, and stop making those movies.

10. You can drink, fart and belch, scratch and wolf whistle all you want big fellow. (there, I gave you one.)


LOL thank you for the fun read. I happen to agree. A man should be allowed to be a man. I prefer them that way.
(If you all didn't have flaws, that we thought we could fix, we would bitch about that, too. LOL)

No deep discussions of relationships after 8pm, where the man shall retreat into his man-space

Thus shall be portioned to man his rightful corner of the dwelling henceforth referred to as his "Man-Space"

I found this old footage of a man who wanted to have babies.



You're talking 2,000 years have passed and we're still stuck in this same position, men still can't have babies. This is the matriarchy in action right here...men just gave up, didn't they? They don't need to hold us back, we're submissive.

The nerve of that one guy:

What's the point in fighting for your right to have babies when you can't have babies?

I'd like to think he was simply a product of his ignorant time but the sad fact is that people still think and talk like this, it's disgusting.

a reply to: HeathenJessie

I say that I see this thread going the same way as the similar one yesterday- to the land of missing and deleted threads. I'm sure you'll get a lot of funny and some irate responses before it disappears altogether- so I'll get my man to fix me a sammich and some popcorn while I watch and wait.

a reply to: HeathenJessie

10. While watching sports, women have to massage hubby until game is over. And keep quiet.

11. Mandatory maternity leave even if we suspect pregnancy.

12. Abuse is a one way street, from mans ____ to woman's ____ only.


Who's with me fellas?

Men should create a male version of the G-Spot...so we can demand women keep trying until we tell them they've found it.

a reply to: GeauxHomeYoureDrunk

Because he is a better cook, and you might burn the popcorn right? I know mine makes a mean grilled cheese.


LOL

a reply to: GeauxHomeYoureDrunk

My brother, you must remain strong, mentally.

Please, this thread harbours no malicious tendencies or hidden agenda, but it a thing of beauty. I can see no legitimate reason why the moderators would deem fit to delete this entertaining and interesting thread.

Even in the most absurd and outlandish or claims there are nuggets of truth and wisdom, honourable sir!

Kind sir!

Etc.

originally posted by: chiefsmom
a reply to: GeauxHomeYoureDrunk

Because he is a better cook, and you might burn the popcorn right? I know mine makes a mean grilled cheese.


LOL

Ya know he is a pretty darn good cook! He doesn't know it yet but he's making the pork chops for dinner tonight!

originally posted by: chiefsmom
a reply to: GeauxHomeYoureDrunk

Because he is a better cook, and you might burn the popcorn right? I know mine makes a mean grilled cheese.


LOL

Hang about, I only just noticed that and decided to actually read the entire post by GeauxHomeYoureDrunk...you're a woman?!


Steady on, lads...we've been infiltraaaa-eh... meet GeauxHomeYoureDrunk, very good friend of mine, ahem....SHE'S a very good friend of mine, I ...er, how are you...

...Geaux?

originally posted by: HeathenJessie
a reply to: GeauxHomeYoureDrunk

My brother, you must remain strong, mentally.

Please, this thread harbours no malicious tendencies or hidden agenda, but it a thing of beauty. I can see no legitimate reason why the moderators would deem fit to delete this entertaining and interesting thread.

Even in the most absurd and outlandish or claims there are nuggets of truth and wisdom, honourable sir!

Kind sir!

Etc.

Why thank you ma'am! * tips hat and tweaks invisible mustache*

a reply to: HeathenJessie

Muuuaaahahahaha!!!!!

You know what, she's right this thread's rumbled.

I'm out, thread's rubbish anyway.

See yas.

Yeah I never let the feminist bull crap affect who I am as a guy or what I do. I really don't care what women want, but I know all those women who want equal rights will turn the other cheek when it comes to do real hard labor or a challenging job.

But low and behold when it comes to a bigger paycheck. You have their attention...


Oh and btw if you didn't know women will have to register for the selective service in the USA. Equal rights? Yes?

originally posted by: HeathenJessie
8. We're sick of Queen Elizabeth, she's had a good run but it's about time a real man was given a shot of the title...we want Harry as king.

We are Americans damn it! Take that aristocracy and shove it where the sun don't shine!

Live free or die! NO MONARCHY!!!