Best Way to Meet Your Partner?

From your experiences, what do you guys think are the best places to meet someone? And the best way to approach someone? And are there bad times/places to approach someone?

I'm a guy. I'm out of college, and I moved to a new area about two years ago for work. I am in a situation where I have gone on dates with many girls in the past two years but nothing sticks. I've mostly been using online dating apps. Girls in this area don't seem to have similar interests to mine, so I find it hard to meet anyone. I've never been in a relationship; while I'm not exactly socially awkward I'm quite introverted, so picking up girls at the bar does not seem natural to me.

Whatever I'm doing right now isn't working, so any tips are greatly appreciated!

Hit em over the head with a club then throw em over your shoulder an carry em back to your cave .

a reply to: Wang Tang

I met my past 3 partners on online dating sites and had some good relationships that lasted a few years but am hard to live with due to some issues that came about from a head injury years back.

I am sure that people will tell you otherwise but not a bad starting point and many success stories out there.

a reply to: Wang Tang

There is no "best way", yet most people find someone for better or worse. What are your interests? Try hitting up your friends to set up group hang outs with women they know are single.

a reply to: Wang Tang

You would thrive in a church. Chicks there long for the strong quite type. Cary around a guitar, just need to learn three chords and bam. Chick magnet.

Good question. Stay out of bars if you are looking for more than a one nighter. Otherwise , just get out more. Met my wife at a Wendy's fast food location. Just struck up a conversation and 6 months later.... Been going strong for 38 years now

originally posted by: Wang Tang
From your experiences, what do you guys think are the best places to meet someone?

Well, the absolute best place is the Church. Even if you're not particularly religious. That's because people who go to church tend to have ideas of stability and family in their heads, and have the right sort of motives for long term relationships.

The next best place is at work. Get a job at a large company with lots of employees, so you'll have a statistical chance of finding someone. The advantage of the corporate friend is that you immediately have things in common to talk about.

Of course, if you're looking for a one night stand, then there's no better place than the bar, pub, or nightclub. But, that usually requires a special "pick up" skill, that introverts don't usually possess.

For an introvert, it's the church or company you work for.

An alternative is to join some club of volunteers, that do something in your neighborhood. That's usually a good place, since people willing to volunteer their time and effort to help others already have the main ingredient of "sharing" that's required for a good relationship. This would also help to pull an introvert out of his shell, so he can open up to others a bit better.

Next up is to join a cycle club, or walking club, a sail boat club, etc., get some exercise together with a bunch of other people, so you're doing fun things together.

Depending on how picky you are, it could take awhile, trying out all these various possibilities, to find that special someone.

But, these are the traditional ways.

Of course the best of all ways is during college years, since you generally have both the time and the right youth energy for the hunt, and everybody you meet is usually single. But, those days are gone for you, so check out the alternatives mentioned above.

Finally, there's the dating "service". That's for people who have no time to do any of the above.

a reply to: Wang Tang

I find traditions of dating are back asswards!

Why do men, seed spreaders, have to stage false potential to gain access to the rights of mating? Women are the 'womb bearers', and already hold the key to positive parenting for the long term, am I wrong?

The seed spreading mentality leaves a situation where there is less brain waves focusing on the environment around men. That is exactly why men walk right by a pile of laundry. Womb bearers naturally (not speaking all women) have a deep seeded focus on home environment, yet the way things are put together fall into the areas of less focused on. The nurturing aspects of women is exactly why they are asking for help when it comes to getting on the roof to set the dish to 21 degrees. The balance each provide to procreation and parenting is amazing... but not very successful when the men are deciding who mates with who.

If man is left to have to decide, they will alter persona naturally, to gain entry... only to revert to one true self after settling in. This in turn, disrupts the chi of the relationship... hence the 50% divorce rates.

By accident.

Go out, have some drinks, wake up the next morning and see who's next to you. Worked for most of my friends that have kids and are married right now.

Not sure if I'd call that love though

a reply to: Wang Tang

There is a new dating app that is in beta right now but is set to be released in a few days called Hater. It matches people based on things you both love and hate. It is really fun, but there is no way to tell how many people will use it until the full launch. If you are religious, then church really is the best place. If not, just try to get out more. Personally, I have a thing for librarians...

a reply to: Wang Tang

bookstores, the library. You can even shop by interest if you pay attention to the books they are looking at and strike up a conversation accordingly. Plus, at least you know you are meeting someone who can read and has interests beyond "OMG, LOL, EMOJI STFU!!! TTYL!"

originally posted by: Wang Tang

From your experiences, what do you guys think are the best places to meet someone?

Hiding in the ladies room always worked for me.

a reply to: Wang Tang

From your experiences, what do you guys think are the best places to meet someone? And the best way to approach someone? And are there bad times/places to approach someone?

I think the best places are the places that you enjoy being at. If you are doing things you enjoy and they are there (assuming they are enjoying themselves as well) then that would be ideal, IMO. From concerts to parks and just wherever you hang out in your free time.
The best approach is to just walk up to someone introduce yourself and go from there. It can be as natural as breathing but, I understand that it can be difficult for an introverted person and you may just have to work on that a bit.
I don't necessarily agree that meeting someone in a club is a bad place. If that's your lifestyle and theirs...so be it. It IS a place where folks congregate for drinking or dancing or pool or music or whatever.

I wonder why you seem hurried to be in a relationship. It's a big world with lots of folks. I say enjoy yourself and meet lots of people and when it's right for longer term then it will come easily. I don't know that I believe in 'forever' romantic love. I think folks change and sometimes that love carries through but more often it doesn't (my opinion only).

Good luck in whatever comes your way and, really, take your time, smell the roses . You've got plenty of time, hopefully.

If it makes you feel better, go looking and looking until the right one comes along that you weren't even looking for.

Or wait, he she it will be along in due course.

a reply to: Wang Tang

Here's the secret. There are plenty of girls who are interested in you. You can't see it, because you're not """looking""" for it. They're staring right at you. When you see it, you'll know.

So ... start looking back and seeing who it is that's 'staring' at you.

Oh, yeah ... know your limits and don't try to hook a fish you should know you'll never be able to reel in. Maannn ... the stories I could tell ...

a reply to: AMPTAH

Being in the military, I unfortunately don't have many options at work. I may have already tried and exhausted my one opportunity

I have been going to running groups and volunteering to help organize races, but it seems the ladies my age in this area don't care much for running... But I'll definitely continue with this just in case.

I do like the idea of volunteering more. I like that more than the idea of going to church. I don't really like the idea of going to church just to meet women, because I could care less about church otherwise. But by volunteering I'll be doing something good regardless of if I meet someone.

I may just wait it out here for another 1+ year and choose my next location more carefully.

a reply to: TNMockingbird

You see, that's the trouble. The things I enjoy doing in my free time, there's no girls around. I suppose that's one of the downfalls of being an outsider in any new area. I'm just not meeting anyone new right now, and I can't find a girlfriend if I'm not meeting anyone.

I don't know if "hurried" to be in a relationship is the right word. I look at it more like, I "prefer" to be in a relationship. It's something I've never experienced. It's not like I will jump into a relationship with the next girl that comes around. In fact, judging by my history, it most likely will not result in a relationship... which is a separate issue in itself that I'm also becoming slightly concerned about. But my main concern right now is in my inability to meet new people.

Most of my friends are either married or live 4+ hours away, so I'm getting to that point in my life where my friends are more concerned with their own families and I'm on my own.

a reply to: Atsbhct

Running, tennis, writing, reading, traveling, drinking, occasional video games and netflix.

Most of my friends in the area are married, and hang out with other married couples.

a reply to: Wang Tang

Friends of friends, random chance, doing things that interest you. And avoid "lots" of dating. It seems to those who date a lot aren't doing enough "pre-screening", and the serial dating seems to become a tedium for many, who then grow tired of the whole experience.

Hold out for something worthwhile, play more video games in the meantime. Worked great for me!