Are you happy to be alive?

The answer to this question usually changes over time. If we are born in a relatively loving family, then the answer is a strong yes.
And if things go well in our young adult period, then it is the same answer.
But as we grow older, and eventually enter old age. the answer becomes less clear.

And if we become sick with a long term disease that will kill us in time, then the only reason to remain alive is for the people we love.

The question as to whether you are happy to be alive disappears in the moment before you die.

I'm not happy to be alive, but I am currently willing. But this is subject to change. And nobody but me will make the decision.

originally posted by: droid56
And if we become sick with a long term disease that will kill us in time, then the only reason to remain alive is for the people we love.

This is the situation I am currently facing, aside from the fact that my disease is not fatal; I do loathe living with it though, and generally loathe living at this point. I'm 29.5 years old now and haven't been myself since I was 15 years old, so I've more or less missed some of the most important stages of my young adult life. I have nothing to live for and more than likely never will, but I feel obligated to exist for the benefit of my parents and sister, even though I'd much rather not deep down. My drinking habits are beginning to escalate as of late, so I'm almost certain that within the next year I probably will work up the courage to take the plunge.

Here's my philosophy: nobody asks to be born, and not everybody's life works out, but if there were a few good moments here and there, then it was better than nothing at all.

C'est la vie.

a reply to: droid56



Life is a journey, sometimes your soul is beaten and your mind is tired.
It's easy to feel down in the world we live in, we could have advanced way further if we had been able to set aside our petty differences in the past and worked towards a unified humanity, whilst still preserving our identities as individuals.

We must be thankful for the life we have been given in the eyes of the universe.
We are specks, semi-intelligent specs in a deep dark void, for who'm the odds of long term survival are bleak.

Lets enjoy the opportunity to observe, be thankful that you get a chance to see, even if it's not always great.
Always strive to make it better.

a reply to: GreenGunther

When replying click the "youtube" button and insert everything in the URL that is after the equal "=" sign.

a reply to: JinMI

Success indeed
Thank you.

My 100% honest answer is that I live an extremely fortunate and very good life, but I also think that life pretty much just sucks for everyone in general. I wouldn't say I'm "happy" to be alive, but I'm very certainly happy that I don't have it as bad as a lot of people. By comparison, I've been pretty damn lucky in life so far.

Sometimes we are stronger than we know.
Other times, we need to hold on to whatever it is that keeps us going. Hold on.

a reply to: droid56

You are correct: the answer to the question changes over time.

While having gone through periods of being elated, happy, unhappy and depressed so far throughout my life, I would classify my current attitude toward life as somewhat 'indifferent'. I am neither happy nor sad that I am alive; I am alive and that is that.

I go about my daily existence accepting that it can either continue or end at any moment. I am willing to go with the flow and accept either fate.

I've had PTSD for a long time and this week I went to 4 days of EMDR light therapy. I am much less anxious now and can relax enough to enjoy and pay attention to things. So today I am happy to be alive. I also decided to pursue my (secondary) career as a musician and writer recently. Having these hobbies makes me happy. I also make as much free time in my life as possible and focus on simplifying things.

I have not always been doing as well as I am today. I went through a lot of trauma for a lot of years. However, I always wanted to keep on living. It's just something that I must have decided I was going to do at one point. I have always been happy to be alive even during the worst times. What if death is nothing? I'd rather be alive and conscious.

One of the things I do on a daily basis is manifest things. This involves wishing for a goal and then using logic to figure out the steps needed to accomplish that goal. It definitely takes effort to work. But it allows me to improve my lifestyle. And it gets me through the hard times.

a reply to: droid56

The answer to this question usually changes over time.

I think that is because people by their very nature, are going to change over time. Your perspective is going to change along with you. Perspective is everything when you ask yourself this question.

For some, its the "He who dies with the most toys wins" attitude but the funny thing is, if you notice, that when people like this talk about how unhappy they are, whether its because they wish they had a better job, or a better house, or a better car/wife/kids whatever, as soon as they get those things, they still aren't happy. They just go right on to the next thing to want. Being happy is really more of a decision to make I think more so than anything you can "get" in this world. Like pops used to say, "You come into this world with nothing and you're gonna leave it with nothing....except the love you've given to others."

I've had several treatments, surgeries, drugs, you name it battling a very aggressive, advanced stage type of melanoma for the past 10 years or so. This last bout a few years ago literally almost killed me. I was reading a book that a hospice nurse of 30 plus years had written about the main things her patients wished for when faced with the very real prospect of their death. The number one thing at the top of the list, was not "I wish I had more money." or anything of the sort. It was, "I wish I had just been happier." When I learned how advanced my cancer was and was given just months to live, my main thoughts were much the same lines. "Why the hell did I waste so much time worrying about so much stupid crap?"

And if we become sick with a long term disease that will kill us in time, then the only reason to remain alive is for the people we love.

Hate to break it to you buddy but we are all dying one day at a time anyways! Life is short. The older you get the faster it goes. From that perspective, the people you love are the only reason to remain alive anyway.

Life is filled with uncertainties.

...

a reply to: LuXTeN

Yes Uncertainties, changes and challenges.

Sometimes we get lost in the shadows and darkness and other times we find that glimmer of light and hope that resides within.

Against all logic, yes, I am happy to be alive.

When was fit and healthy I was in the wrong frame of mind to enjoy life and would have quite happily ended things. It took a bit of doing to keep going.

Now I'm ill I find myself not so keen to drop off the perch. As I have to become used to living with less and less I somehow find reasons to be contented with my lot. I have computers I'll probably never play on anymore, a living room with a TV that I'm too ill to enjoy. A beautiful garden I could only see a small part of from the window if I was well enough to get up and look. Birds chirping outside that I can't see except for their occasional shadow as they fly past the curtains.

What's to live for? I dunno, but somehow I'm alright within myself.

I've had a couple of moments when I've sensed that, or wondered if, the Grim Reaper is near. I've tried to prepare myself to go without squawking about it. Meet him with a smile

Regrets? I don't regret not doing anything. I've done my best given my circumstances and they were never right for me to see the Grand Canyon. My regrets are for those times when I've been less than kind or tactful to someone or other when they didn't deserve it. I really am sorry about that.

a reply to: droid56

There is a difference between living, and mere survival.

When I start living, I will let you know.

a reply to: droid56

I subscribe to the believe we all chose our life's path before we were born. I think some, like yourself, chose extreme hardships to become closer to the prime source "God." I believe we're all learning from our own lives and also influencing others along the way, which includes family members, friends and acquaintances.

How many times have you touched someone's heart, helped someone overcome problems, or had felt that warm feeling when someone did a random act of kindness for you? I think not only are we learning, but also teaching others about respect, consideration and love. Our souls are constantly learning when we see and experience violence, murder, hardships, and acts of kindness.

a reply to: droid56

I'm not sure that I will be able to articulate my thoughts properly so apologies in advance for what may be a jumbled mess of words.
In answer to your question I am happy to be alive at the moment. I find I am at my happiest when I am serving a purpose (other than normal day to day existence) or helping someone, solving problems. I've not always felt this way, there have been dark times. Of course it ebbs and flows.

My Mother suffered with pain and lack of nearly total ambulation, she was 93 when she passed. She had often said to me that she was so tired. I took that to mean in every way. I've not shared much of the days I spent by her bedside as she was dying with anyone and I suppose I should tell my daughters before they read it here. There was a period that she fought terribly. It felt as if whatever she was glimpsing on the other side of the curtain was far worse (scary?) than the life she had been living with illness and pain. I could be way off base but, in those moments it seems she would be much happier to be alive, regardless of conditions, than to not be alive.

My daughter lived through a very dark and scary year +. She stated often that she wanted to die. She was completely and totally void of any care for herself or anyone else for that matter. The situation seemed hopeless, at times. Her symptoms have seemed to go into a 'remission' and she is even working two days a week. She seems to be happy at the moment to be alive and almost given a second chance. I am trying to show her the beauty of the world (to counter the negative-ugly parts) and our purpose to be good humans (or try the best we can) and the joy of this life and the simple gifts here. The sun on our faces, the crisp winter air, the blood pulsing through our bodies after a good hike in the mountains. I suppose I am trying to re wire her thinking...

Sometimes perhaps all that we have is what we bring to those that we love. So, in essence we are living for those we love. I am personally okay with that. I enjoy seeing them happy and being a part of that. So, in turn it causes me happiness to be alive in fulfilling my purpose for being here.

My Mother was in her late 40s when she adopted me and I think (looking back) that act could have been an answer to depression or menopause, perhaps. I think 'saving' me (a young pitiful child) made her happy and gave her a new purpose (?) and renewed her happiness to be alive at that time.

I rambled a bit and got off track up there but, I hope some of it made sense.
I hope good and positive things come your way!

1 out of 10 people in the U.S. are on anti-depressants. IMO people these days are so obsessed with finding their "true love" or achieving the "american dream" they just don't stop to appreciate what they have or the beauty of the world around them. The other main reason is that people are way too overworked, most people I meet who are depressed are that way because they work so much, it's the true evil of such a high level of inequality. It's why I try not to get myself caught up in the rat race, I look for ways to earn money doing what I love. Unleashing your creativity and constantly learning new things is the way to happiness. You can then use that knowledge to work on projects you enjoy, and your financial requirements are much more likely to be met, and as a result your life goals are much more likely to be met, but your material desires are much more likely to fall away when you have other things to keep your mind busy.

Johny was aware it was strange for a person to value knowledge so much, but he didn't have many other reasons for living. For Johny, the value of life was in the beauty and mystery of life, the amazing complexity with which it functions. The thrill of understanding that complexity and then using it to build new things was like ecstasy for Johny. Nikola Tesla once said “I do not think there is any thrill that can go through the human heart like that felt by the inventor as he sees some creation of the brain unfolding to success... Such emotions make a man forget food, sleep, friends, love, everything.”

Little Johny

The older I get the happier I am I'm still alive.

Life is a crapshoot and you have to keep rolling the dice.

a reply to: Cancerwarrior

Very well said.