Psychosis

"Behind closed doors she mixes words to sentences, but each try to form precious meanings seems to end in disappointing failure.

Inside her head is a thunderstorm. A storm of gigantic size and enormous strength. Listening to the noise in her head, she begins to wander into the world of introspection.

It all starts with a glimpse of curiosity; and now she's lost, forgotten in the infinities of her own mind. There are stories happening, making her unable to leave this twisted internal world of hers.

She's getting rid of every touch of logic. Her thoughts flow as if they were a waterfall. Bleeding words, her heart begins to beat to a rhythm so weird and irregular, you think she might die soon. Who is taking control of her?

In her eyes you can see it; the faint glimpse of insanity. She feels it inside of her, the demons returning. This time, they want to play. They want to play with her mind, twist her perception, making her unable to think rationally.

It's a virus expanding across her entire mind. Soon she'll be a slave, forced to think thoughts that arent her own.

She blames herself for being haunted; but does she even know where the demons came from?

They were once a part of her scattered mind, a part of her past that made her traumatized. Now they plague her, showing her metaphors of her own pain and suffering.

She tries to destroy these demons, but each try fails, for they are a part of her own identity. But what she does not know is that she's fighting herself in the cruelest way possible; self destruction.

Never wanting to face the reality of her unwanted past, she now becomes her own victim.

Her demons are faster than her tired mind could ever be. She can never flee this hell of a reality."

a reply to: 3daysgone


Good job on the thread. I can relate.

a reply to: 3daysgone

Wow, having a family member that has mental sickness, this sums up (with great insight) my own (5 year in the moulding) humble diagnostic of his mind and how it works. It is a terrible thing to behold.

Thanks for that, even though its sad...

a reply to: eirgud

"His brain is a splatter painting in itself.
He is like modern art, and you, you are watching him be a thunderstorm of low serotonin. And he feels sorry he's making you sit through this.

He is either shaking so badly he can not focus, or he feels so tired he doesn't want to bother. He is either sure he wants to die, or he's terrified of the possibility. He is either a short-fuse detonation or a long-time radiation.

He is leaking. He is leaking. He is falling apart like old, rusted pipes.

Just for once, just as a change
He'd like to feel like he's not insane."




I hope everything is well for you and your family! I've been where he is, I still am. It doesn't get easier, as much as i'd like to say otherwise, but love and support go a long way. Have a nice night!