How to: Breaking Up

How do normal people break up?

Whether on the breaking side, or broken side..

I'm usually the one broken up with haha. But the last couple times I'm doing the breaking--and I really don't like having to do it. I think I've got someone just not getting the picture, no matter how I lay it down. She won't leave me alone. And I'm starting to have to act like (more of) a jerk.

At first I was trying to be more delicate. She clearly has issues. She's very needy, clingy, and has cutting scars etc. An all around shaky person I don't see myself spending any time with after a couple weeks of giving it a go.

How do you just get rid of someone! I'm not even trying to be tactful anymore. Any advice is good. I'm pretty inexperienced in these matters and probably always will be.

The worst break-up I can remember, I was actually in bed after a lung surgery; tubes in my chest and all. Ouch!

The most recent was easy. I caught her with pants on fire and nothing more needed to be said or done but to part ways.

What was your worst break up? What's your advice for getting it done and over with so both people can move on?

I seriously hate this stuff and it feels like I have to learn how to break up instead of learn how to date sheesh

Away from knifes or easily trow able objects, preferably in a public place and with a good exit plan plotted.

Good luck

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

Respectful and truthful.

If your intention was to find a life partner then show him/her the respect that is connected with the seriousness of that relationship.

Unfortunately, no contact sends the clearest message. I mean -none-. For at least a few months, and with this type of person probably longer.

I mean clearly say this is over, and then no contact.

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

There's no real 100% fool proof way of doing it or having it done to you.

I've been broken up with and I've done the breaking up. Each time was different and for different reasons.

I wish I could give some advice, but it's such a personal and individual thing that what I would say might not work for anyone else.

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

How do normal people break up?

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. HST

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

You'll need a witch and a love for rock music. Summoning Bon Scott should do the trick however.



In seriousness. Be as honest and respectful as possible. Get your point across. If things go south, just walk away. Then leave it at that. Best of luck Buddah

a reply to: JinMI

I guess I should just man up and do it done

Play this song really loud.

originally posted by: seasonal
a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

Respectful and truthful.

Right. This is what my instinct was too. But some people think that means "I'm giving you another chance, you just have to find the secret key."

And thus, they never stop bugging you thinking you'll change your mind.

But on the other hand, some people don't seem to take disrespectful and exaggerated very seriously either.

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

My house was broken into and i was slashed in the face... oh and she slept with my ex best friend... two break ups in one.... made it easy i guess... aside from the face slashing...

a reply to: Aeshma

So you know why I want to get out of this sheet for good!

But I think you win the worst breakup ever.

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

one of my bad ones I let this girl move in.. Well she was a real nutty one, haha. Crazy eyes always get me, but anyway she broke up with me kind of? Hard to say she was so nutty, but she refused to leave my house and I was like damn how am I going to get her out.

She figured that out for me started hitting me one day in the face for no reason I can think of and I kind of let her because as a guy I was scared of having a crazy b call the cops if she even had a scratch you know? But when I got dazed I got her off of me and poured a beer on her then she locked me out #less and without shoes or phone or wallet..

had to climb down the outside of the building and call the cops shirtless haha... Great look.. Well I had enough bruises and blood to the point the just saked where is she? She of course still had the house locked. I got inside after they hauled her away and the entire house was destroyed. Like damn..

She was also a cutter and a "witch" Ohh mee..

that's ONE... way to do it.

I cheated on a girl because she would not let me break up with her no matter what..

the last one she just broke up with me. Just flat out said it to me.

THANK YOU!

gawd that was easy compared to the others.

I still talk to all of them except the one who spent 3 nights in jail. Hope I never run into her ever again.

a reply to: Reverbs

Hearing stories like these convince me I'm doing the right thing

I told her I'm poor, have a drinking problem, and am thinking of growing out a mullet. Not sure what else I can do!

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

How do normal people break up?

i usually bury them alive out in the woods
unless they are a runner , but that's what the tigers are for

i give them a magazine and a torch , i ain't a monster

pretty easy breaking up really

you'll need a good shovel

if your squeamish
you could say you got an STD from a stripper

you would be half telling the truth i guess

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

That sounds like it could work eventually. You just have to work a bit harder at it. You could try:

Eating raw garlic
Developing hygiene problems
Expect her to pick up after you. Seriously, make some mess.
Stop being available

That last suggestion along with a candid little chat ought to be the way to do it, but if it's not getting you anywhere - have fun.

eta wicked idea: Tell her you're pro-Trump or anti-Trump. Just be sure which one will piss her off. Hope you get out alive.

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

If I ever meet any 'normal' folks who have broken off a relationship I'll come back and report their stories, in the meanwhile...

I agree with the above that honesty is the best policy. If you've been dishonest or deceptive in any way, go ahead and come clean about that especially if it's egregious. The cold hard facts can sometimes shock someone into the reality of a situation no matter how hard those things can be to hear.

If you've come right out and asked her to leave you alone and made it clear that there's no future in a romantic relationship together and she is still trying for contact then that could become a little scary. Perhaps she wants to maintain the friendship? I am still friends with all but one of my exes (serious relationships not just dating) and it's fantastic! I still enjoy their company, chats and love them even if we are not/will never be romantic.

Good luck to you!

originally posted by: NarcolepticBuddha
How do normal people break up?

Whether on the breaking side, or broken side..

In prison, that's easy; just squirt them with lighter fluid and strike a light, boom, all broken up!

I'm usually the one broken up with haha.

Back when I was in relationships that I broke up in, having a horror of hurting people (but being good at manipulation), I'd usually arrange that they'd break up with me, and feel bad about it! *__-
I've been with Boopsie for nigh 30 years, and cannot imagine parting, ever.
Love just keeps unfolding, but it takes some time together, to find the door at the bottom of the rabbit hole!

Listen to the Paul Simon song; 'Twenty Ways to leave your Lover'. That's all you need to know.

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

Put everything in writing mate !

Request she does the same should this go to court .

Or ... broken record .

( record ... broken record ... )

I hope she is not after your soul bud !!

Every break up is different ....and one person is usually very emotionally hurt as they don't want to break up....if this girl is clingy as you stated, then you have to be VERY straight forward with her. Tell her point blank it's over , and you don't want to see her anymore. Tell her to go find someone else to fill her void. Don't make ups excuses as to why , or that you have issues.....she wil only want to fix them , to mend your relationship......Break it off completely and spell it out completely for her. Then do not have any contact with her at all. No phone calls, no text, no lunch, nothing. .....it will be hard to do, but she will get the hint and find someone else to cling onto. Until she finds a new person to cling too, she won't leave you alone. That is why you must cut all ties. ..so she can turn her interest elsewhere and move on.