I Just Found Out You're Free!

To subject of OP:

I really like the quotes you post.

I understand you've been through a lot, so have I.

I 100% forgive you for what you put me through. It's ok.
I am still going through it and it's the hardest part of my entire life, and it isn't getting much easier.

You can see I'm going nuts right now but please don't blame yourself.
# Happens. It's ok.

Please believe in me, because I believe in you.

I accept you for who YOU ARE and who YOU CHOOSE TO BE.
I can't wait to read your book. I'm so happy you want to write one.

I don't blame you for anything anymore. I'm sorry that I kept doing that.
You don't deserve the guilt. You were living in abuse for so many years, with someone who didn't Love you right.
I understand how it happened in my life, so maybe I might understand how it happened in yours?

Just tell me about it. I will listen and I won't insult or degrade you. I won't denigrate your character or judge your decisions. I will just care and try to understand your pain.

I will SUPPORT YOU ALWAYS even if you're kicking my butt!!!
I have a feeling you're done beating me up though.
Just a hunch.

I'm not going to yell at you or seek pity or try to give you guilt.
I want to hold hands and smile and laugh, and to hug and cry together.
I want to admire and respect everything about you and to lift you up as the Goddess because your body is Her Temple.
I want to show you the best of me, not the worst.

I want to learn from you, and allow you to continue teaching me.
I am YOUR student as much as you are mine.
You have great wisdom from all of the trials and tribulations you've been through.

Let's take our pain and wash it away together, and care for each other the way want to be cared for.
I know this is one thing we can agree on, and I know our future is bright.
We can work all of this out easily together.
I promise I'll be honest and I'll surrender to you.
I will never manipulate or try to control you!
Believe me I've learned how stupid all of that is.
I'll try to stop lying, please do the same.

All I want is to make this Right with you.
I'm so sorry for everything.
You Win. Please let me win with you.

And I don't mean to screw up the mood of the post above but, getting emotional and crying and expressing meaningful evolution of my Spirit is such a turn on!

It drives me wild.
You do.

Hey, I can't help it you're the hottest woman I've ever seen.
Everything about you is beautiful and attractive.

You taught me how to be wild and ______
Use your imagination, you can fill in the blank.
You know exactly what kinda stuff I'd like to say, hahah!

I'm sorry but you do it all for me.
I've seen a lot of women I'd say are 99's but you're a 100.
The only 100 I know.

I have so much work to do, but I'm at that point where I just throw up my hands and say "I dunno what to do!".
I have a million plans but have to pick 1 thing to take action on.

People tell me take it 1 day at a time but I dunno how that works.
I'm taking every day today. I overwhelm myself and the weight is unbearable.
I'm crushed.

I want everyone to see that.
I want everyone to see that the toughest guy around had an unimaginable weakness.
To know all of his strength came from that weakness.
That the wound he bleeds from is where the light enters him.

To see that the guy who was so damned clever and intelligent got stuck on being an idiot because one person who didn't even try could beat him at every single step of the way and he just couldn't get enough of it.

That the person who beat him earned his respect in ways that no one else ever could. And that he can't stay mad for long at her, and that he admires her more than anyone. That guy who can admire anything about nature or find things in everyone else to admire and emulate, admired the person who beat the living crap out of him mercilessly more than he admired anyone else.

Because he loved her.

This isn't an unhealthy obsession. It's the greatest learning lesson in my life.
I am facing my Problem. I am searching everywhere for answers, I am struggling with God, I am pulling out all the stops and trying everything in desperation. I am focused, dedicated, and determined to find out what is wrong with me and why I am like this and why I NEED this. I am Faithful no matter how many times I bang my head.

I fall down and get back up for more.
I keep thinking I'll win although at this point I don't really see how winning is in my cards.

Being Faithful to this makes me complete inside.
It is the only fulfilling thing I've ever experienced aside of my children.

I wish another human being could see it and believe in what I am and why I am this way.
But after all I've been through I automatically think everyone's against me and I'm all alone here.

I understand that no one's going to "take my side", and I don't even care at this point - with one exception.
I want her to take my side. I used to think if I could get a judge to walk a mile in my shoes I'd be ok, but I was wrong.
I need her to walk in my shoes. I need her to understand what's going on inside of me.

I need her to understand my infinite forgiveness and my endless apologies.
Because we're suppose to be friends. Not enemies or going through antagonizing animosity.
I want to give her flowers, write her poems and stories, take her for walks, listen to her, and give her the world.

a reply to: Jdennis10

a reply to: Jdennis10

And from this Dolphin Spirit blooms an Orange Orchid, which I offer to you.



It is a message of something exotic, representing Beauty and Grace, just like the Dolphin that bore it unto me.
All Orchids symbolize Love and Beauty, but an Orange one additionally expresses Enthusiasm and Boldness.

It exhibits an aura of Refinement, Charm, and Thoughtfulness.

As Orchids grow in higher humidity climes, so too does this one come from the mist. Perhaps it's the spray of the Dolphin's splash in our faces?

Orchids (Orchidaceae family) earned their name from the Greek word orchis, meaning testicle. Their fleshy underground tubers were thought to resemble testicles, at least that’s what Greek botanist Theophrastos thought at the time.

This is why the flower also represents Fertility, Vitality, and Virility.

In Chinese medicine it is also used to treat lung, eye, and stomach disorders. Perhaps it will help you to breathe fully, see better, and digest the message more easily? So take a deep breath, open your eyes, and feast on this oracle of the Orchid.

It is used in sweets, perfumes, and cosmetics. So enjoy it's honeyed delightful taste and get a whiff of it's fragrant scent while you allow it to color the expressions of your face with pleasant surprise and excitement...

a reply to: Jdennis10

And what's this?
An Orca is with this Dolphin, and I think they must have a 'thing' for each other. Perhaps that's why the Dolphin brings me Orchids?


This "whale" must 'kill' em with passionate Love and gentle Kindness, because that looks like a kiss rather than a bite if you ask me.

You know Orcas are the biggest Dolphins of all, and just like their cousins they are extremely playful, curious, and highly intelligent? They aren't really the "Killers" they are made out to be, and they aren't exactly "Whales" either, that's all because they are misunderstood and few care to look at them very closely. They are Lovers, I assure you.

Orcas represent the Divine Feminine and their colors express the type of Duality found among all Dolphins. So again we see the Yin and Yang but here the Yin is very powerfully represented. That's because Orcas are matrilineal and females lead the pods.

They are masters of communication and language, and have an incredibly intricate vocabulary. This Spirit aids in conveying important messages. It also has an unbelievably massive brain, so it brings inspiration, logic, and creativity in spades. It's navigation skills are impressive, and so serves as a wonderful "Guide" in the Spiritual realm.

This creature is docile, gentle, generous, and very nurturing. It's willing to help and teach even the least fortunate of us. It tells us about how important teamwork and synchronization is, so is very big on instructing us of the importance of Trust, Listening, giving Advice, being Compassionate and expressing Sympathy, and Uplifting others while it leaps out of the depths to new heights.

It also represents the essence of Mystery and the Unknown, and it can aid in Purification through the waters of Spirit and Healing through it's offerings of Love and Support. It's massive splash will Cleanse. It is highly mobile and Patient, and a master of Strategy and Tactics.

Perhaps you might recognize this Spirit's energy here now?
I definitely do. I know it all too well....

a reply to: muzzleflash

Wow amazing photos, I am a 10 min break from work and saw this. Very cool!

a reply to: Jdennis10

I wonder if I should post what I said about the Dolphin initially to you that led to those posts?

Anyone who sees it won't understand what's going on here contextually. Hmmm... let me know what you think. I'd love to show everyone.

If you'd rather I don't, it's ok. If you wanna try something really crazy, let's show off to anyone crazy enough to stumble upon it...

I'm sorry that I'm so proud...

This is nuts huh?
But it's fun and it makes my Heart skip beats.
I totally should copy paste that u2u...

a reply to: Jdennis10

Some days I just feel like
I'm in the wrong place at the right time
And a long way to go to realize
I've been standing in the wrong line

Funny that you should ask how I'm doing
Cause today just seems like a fight
All the castles I made turned into ruins
Guess I built them too close to the tide

And it seems like every street light's turning red
And there's no right side of the bed
And this could all be in my head
But right now I'm wondering why why why

Some days I just feel like
I'm in the wrong place at the right time
And a long way to go to realize
I've been standing in the wrong line
Might not be okay, but I'm getting used to feeling this way
Might not be okay, but I'm getting used to feeling this way

I go right, maybe take a left
It doesn't matter, I move back with each step
I know you think that I'm crazy by now
But at least I know you know what I'm talking about

And it feels like there's a heartbeat in your chest
That doesn't line up with the rest
And this could all be in your head
But by now you're wondering why why why

Some days I just feel like
I'm in the wrong place at the right time
And a long way to go to realize
I've been standing in the wrong line
Might not be okay, but I'm getting used to feeling this way
Might not be okay, but I'm getting used to feeling this way

They say live for today, but I keep praying for tomorrow
And I'm all out of luck, so do you got some I can borrow?

a reply to: Jdennis10

a reply to: Jdennis10

Hi.

You're giving me Heart attacks.

And I bet you think this is really funny...

a reply to: Jdennis10

((Posting this in here too from the Shed thread so I won't lose track of it))

I figured you out...

I was sifting through my mind a few days ago and realized, you're...



You're none other than the Lady Sif! A real Wonder Woman!










Whoa now, don't get upset at me!


I know you're like "Now Jason, what the heck does Lady Sif, an Asgardian in Marvel comics, have to do with Wonder Woman, the most gorgeous female in DC Comics?? They're rival companies, and the characters don't seem to have much in common!

Well m'Lady, allow me to hack the Universal code and take you on an amazing...


and show you how these two Goddesses just might be a lot more like each other, and you - than you thought I knew.



In fact, we'll just merge all 3 of you into 1...


Maybe we can call you the Uncanny JD (and yes, I'm pretty sure you're from another realm!).
And yes, I just did that in front of everyone!

Wow.

a reply to: Jdennis10

a reply to: Jdennis10



It's so hard to be patient.
But I'll try.

I also have trouble trusting, so I'm sorry about that.
I'll try harder.



I'll shut up and pray.



I'll face my fears and stand defiantly.
It ain't easy, but I'll do it.
#NoFear

originally posted by: kibric
a reply to: muzzleflash

you know there might be the perfect girl out there for you
but you might not notice due to your heart ache

maybe give someone else the chance to make you happy ?

There.

It took a week but I wanted to take your suggestion (mostly in public so there's proof).

I got totally into it, I was gung ho and 100% sincere and did my best.

But what happened?
Exactly what I predicted due to my anomalous curse creating repeats of the same circumstances and reactions.

I was lead on, hell I hit on her and she offered me a job with her.
Got her phone #.

Then what?
She decides to not really say anything and let me just text for a few days, let's me write all this stuff and get all emotional and have all these feelings, although I explicitly said multiple times, like a dozen times "If I'm smothering you tell me to stop, if I'm annoying you just let me know, if I'm bothering you at work say so, if this isn't cool just slap me and say it straight up".

But what's she do? What all the last 30 of them did.
Played games. Was deceptive. Treated me like garbage. Didn't give a # about my feelings at all.

Didn't even respect me enough as a human being to grace me with a "hey dude I ain't into it" till who knows how long later. Days? Or was it just a few hours? Who knows. They keep all the facts secret.

You have no idea what happened of course.
If I copy pasted the entire text conversation plus all U2Us, you'd see.
I got robbed bro. Again.

It's gotta be a curse. How could every last woman I am interested in be like this?

You know what? I give up.
I don't give a #!

All I care about from now on?
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
ME.

I'm officially done giving a #.

When I get my millions, what's going to happen???
They'll be on their knees.
"Oh Jason, but don't you love me? You said you did."

And what will I say?
Just think. It's real easy.