A Friend In Arizona...

Greetings fellow members, more particularly members from the United States!

Even more particularly, residents of Arizona, I need your opinions.

A friend of mine has recently traveled to Arizona for business. His boss, and a few sturdy fellows, have gone to secure and load some merchandise for their warehouse here in the UK. The reason for the trip is all by the by however, as the real issue is this:

My friends lady love (who also happens to be my best friend), has been absolutely worried out of her mind about the trip. Shes scared that the plane he catches in or out, could be hit by lightning and blow up, could be hijacked and blown up, she is worried that he is going to get shot by gangsters, shot by the police at random, shot by thieves, or just straight up murdered for the merry hell of it. Shes worried that Trump aligned protestors might carry him away and burn him on a pyre for being British, and worried that some bunch of Hilary supporters might mistake him for a Trump supporter and do the same thing for different reasons, and all of this fear stems from the fact that the US is a little bit of a hot mess right now, and we out here in the rest of the world can all see that.

Now, I have a unique perspective on all this, because I have you guys to refer to on a near daily basis, about events that are afoot in your country, your individual states, and so on, so I am not nearly as concerned as she is.

But what I want to know from members with experience in the area is this...If someone asked you to explain to a hysterical person, exactly what the dangers are, and are not of being in Arizona for a week, what would you say to them?

I appreciate any and all possible information, that might help me put my friend at some ease about the plight of her man. Thank you very much in advance.

a reply to: TrueBrit

I would be more concerned about getting bit by a rattlesnake in Arizona than anything your friend is worrying about.

And those odds are pretty damn slim to begin with.

My friend who lives there is convinced it's a UFO playground! Make sure your friend brings a camera!

a reply to: TrueBrit

She's absolutely correct.

On my way to work this morning, I had to shoot 4 people. And that was after my road-rage incident. The death toll of pro-Trump supporters is nearing 50 million right now.

And funny enough, they are now voting for Hillary!

The gangs have taken over my office building but because everyone belongs to the same gang, we're good here.


Some advice for your friend.

When he gets off the plane (if it hadn't exploded yet) then have him "bust a cap" in anyone so he earns some street cred before he leaves the airport.

That way he might just survive until he gets to the hotel.


(or you can tell her to stop being silly. Last time I visited the UK, Mary Poppins didn't visit, the Queen was busy, Sherlock didn't solve a case, and it wasn't foggy at any time I was there. Though I did drink tea.)

a reply to: TrueBrit

Stay hydrated, in the shade and wear sun block. Maybe some Pepto if they're not accustomed to spicy food.

Seriously, that's about it.

Arizona has a charm and beauty all of it's own. Your friend should be fine.

a reply to: TrueBrit

Meh, when it comes to Arizona - and the desert regions in general - all arguments usually end with somebody sagely insisting that it's a dry heat and with all others nodding in agreement.

As for the chaotic face of the US?

Tell your friend that, for better or for worse, our media thrives on sensationalism and heavy propaganda. Basically put - it's all reality TV... Hints of what's true baked into a massive cake of exaggeration and over the top rhetoric. In reality we're mostly pretty boring people who just want to get home from work so that we can drink a beer and watch TV.

It's just that we also kind of like the rest of the world to perceive us all as being strung out, mostly psycho versions of Rambo.

I mean I've lived here my entire life and only been shot once.

Arizona is actually a pretty awesome place with some incredible natural beauty. Your friends will be fine.

a reply to: DBCowboy

Hey, I told her as much, but I thought it would be wise to get something right from the horses mouth, so that she understands how little of a risk he really is taking. While I understand her concern from the perspective, that of someone who has consumed little more than mass media would produce on the subject, I am not unaware that things are not as reported more often than not, and just wanted to get some sample opinion from locals for her.

Shes right not to trust my word, given that I have never been there after all!

Thanks for that DBCowboy, appreciate it!

a reply to: Hefficide

Cheers Heff.

As I mentioned to DBCowboy above, this thread is just something I can show my friend, to reassure her that her expectations and concerns, are not supported by the facts locally, and I really appreciate your help with that endeavour!

a reply to: TrueBrit

Tell her we're just like visiting France. Only we're nice and speak in a way that's mostly understood.

I apologize, but this made me laugh.

I was actually wondering, yesterday, how this election is being portrayed around the world. Thanks for giving me a picture!

I'm not in Arizona, so I can't speak for that location. But for my area, all I've seen is a guy standing on the corner with a poster of a cannabis leaf, and it said "Stay calm and smoke weed"!

Tell your friend to go to Canada instead. Everyone one there is super polite although there is a very high probability that she will fall into a pothole and never be seen again.

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

Oh the hell with that!

She could do that here!

a reply to: TrueBrit

Yeah, but do you also have mosquitos the size of 747s harboring a strain of Zika whose side effects make you want to eat poutine and watch high school hockey?

Canada is like the Australia of the Western Hemisphere, it is loaded with deadly wildlife. Maybe she should just go to Wales. I hear she would be safe as long as she is not a sheep.

a reply to: TrueBrit

Just don't remind her about rattlesnakes, scorpions, heat stroke, haboobs, that person that was sniping at cars going down the interstate in Phoenix a while back, the innumerable amount of bodies probably buried in the desert areas, drug traffickers, human traffickers, wild javelinas, or Sheriff Joe Arpaio and you should be fine.

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

Just don't recommend Scotland. The men all wear skirts and they eat Haggis. And they're immortal, from the clan McCloud or something like that.

a reply to: TrueBrit

Let them solve their problems as a couple. Don't get in the middle.

a reply to: SlapMonkey

But.....

It's a dry heat.

originally posted by: DBCowboy
Just don't recommend Scotland. The men all wear skirts and they eat Haggis. And they're immortal, from the clan McCloud or something like that.

Wait, they're 'immortal'??!?!!

Oh, no, I thought someone said 'immoral'. Too late......

Americans love Brits.

I'm a previous resident of Arizona, my father and my sister (with her 4 kids) still live there. Coming from your neck of the woods, people may be worried about people with guns running amok in Arizona. The people carrying legally ARE NOT THE ONES YOU NEED TO WORRY ABOUT.

Arizona is absolutely the most beautiful state I've lived in, the people are amazing, and the weather can be questionable but this time of year, the cold at night is what will really get you.

And this is the perspective of a man who lived 10 miles from the border as the crow flies. Tell your friend she has nothing to fear.