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The Errollorre Adventures
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At the Faery Kingdom the forces under Queen Leyka continued to gather.
Night Star was pleased and overjoyed to see Gordi and Syx.
New friends and old gathered and prepared for the battle.
Errollorre, Aria and Troll waited for instructions on what part they were to play in this conflict.
Aria had demonstrated to Errollorre that she was perhaps the deadliest warrior he had ever seen.
The reunions and preparations for battle were interrupted by the sight of hundreds of crows flying overhead.
Errollorre cupped his hands over his eyes to get a look at the spectacle in the sky.
“They seem to be carrying something. Merciful heavens! It’s the wizard Carl!”
The crows released the wizard and he floated towards the ground.
His fuzzy bathrobe billowed out like a parachute as it gently lowered him through the air.
The throng of warriors and spectators groaned and moaned at the sight they were beholding.
“Get a grip ya heathens!” said the wizard as he landed. “They’re called boxer shorts. You should be so lucky to have a pair.”
Troll ran over and gave the wizard a hug that took the air out of his lungs.
“Troll no like wizards, but you no like wizards.” said Troll as he released him.
“Wizard Carl we saw the witch kill you!” said Errollorre.
“No you didn’t” said the wizard. “That was a projection. With the witch in a weakened state it was easy for me to influence her mind. She sent out that projection of what she thought of me. I never looked like that snooty wizard guy she turned me into. She was always delusional like that.
I said hello once to her years ago and she thought I wanted to marry her. She followed me around for weeks. She was a strange one from the beginning.. But no time for these tales I must speak with Queen Lekya.”
Queen Leyka stepped forward from behind several soldiers.
“Speak your piece wizard. I have heard of you from your friends. Now I will hear what you have to say.”
“Your majesty” said the wizard.
“War is upon you. I have come from ten miles behind your very line in the west. The witch has somehow got forces behind your lines and they are advancing up the Faery Kingdom as we speak.
I counted tens of thousands of warriors.
Demonic beings of every sort.
And they had leading them Rhinophants.”
“What is a Rhinophant?” asked Errollorre.
The are a cross between a rhinoceros and a giant elephant.” said the wizard. “ They are heavily armoured.
No arrow or flaming missile will penetrate their skin.
They drag behind them great plows that turn over the land.
The troops behind pour salt on the open soil.
The burn and destroy all in their path.
And they will be here in just a few hours.”
Night Star was pleased and overjoyed to see Gordi and Syx.
New friends and old gathered and prepared for the battle.
Errollorre, Aria and Troll waited for instructions on what part they were to play in this conflict.
Aria had demonstrated to Errollorre that she was perhaps the deadliest warrior he had ever seen.
The reunions and preparations for battle were interrupted by the sight of hundreds of crows flying overhead.
Errollorre cupped his hands over his eyes to get a look at the spectacle in the sky.
“They seem to be carrying something. Merciful heavens! It’s the wizard Carl!”
The crows released the wizard and he floated towards the ground.
His fuzzy bathrobe billowed out like a parachute as it gently lowered him through the air.
The throng of warriors and spectators groaned and moaned at the sight they were beholding.
“Get a grip ya heathens!” said the wizard as he landed. “They’re called boxer shorts. You should be so lucky to have a pair.”
Troll ran over and gave the wizard a hug that took the air out of his lungs.
“Troll no like wizards, but you no like wizards.” said Troll as he released him.
“Wizard Carl we saw the witch kill you!” said Errollorre.
“No you didn’t” said the wizard. “That was a projection. With the witch in a weakened state it was easy for me to influence her mind. She sent out that projection of what she thought of me. I never looked like that snooty wizard guy she turned me into. She was always delusional like that.
I said hello once to her years ago and she thought I wanted to marry her. She followed me around for weeks. She was a strange one from the beginning.. But no time for these tales I must speak with Queen Lekya.”
Queen Leyka stepped forward from behind several soldiers.
“Speak your piece wizard. I have heard of you from your friends. Now I will hear what you have to say.”
“Your majesty” said the wizard.
“War is upon you. I have come from ten miles behind your very line in the west. The witch has somehow got forces behind your lines and they are advancing up the Faery Kingdom as we speak.
I counted tens of thousands of warriors.
Demonic beings of every sort.
And they had leading them Rhinophants.”
“What is a Rhinophant?” asked Errollorre.
The are a cross between a rhinoceros and a giant elephant.” said the wizard. “ They are heavily armoured.
No arrow or flaming missile will penetrate their skin.
They drag behind them great plows that turn over the land.
The troops behind pour salt on the open soil.
The burn and destroy all in their path.
And they will be here in just a few hours.”
edit on 25-4-2016 by Errollorre because: (no reason given)
Chapter 24
Errollorre, Aria, the wizard Carl and Troll walked along a road that would lead them to the front lines of the battle against the Witch Queen and her armies.
“Night Star wasn’t very specific about where we were needed” said Errollorre.
“She has many responsibilities and much on her mind” said Aria.
“My advice is for us to join up with our forces left flank” said the wizard Carl.
“Quite often the right side and middle are strengthened but the left flank is neglected.”
“Troll used to being left” said Troll.
After hiking for several hours Errollorre and his party reached a clearing on a hill overlooking a large valley that lay several miles before the witch's castle.
There once was great forests here, but the witch's dragons had burned everything to cinders.
On the far hillside could be seen countless thousands of the witch's troops lined up and prepared for battle.
All manner of horrible creatures stood ready to attack and kill.
Errollorre and company was surprised to see the Accasian forces had broken its line and was in disarray.
Some soldiers wandered back as if they were abandoning the field.
As they walked closer they noticed several soldiers huddled around a body that lay beneath a tall white horse.
“What is happening here?” asked Errollore. “Why are the soldiers abandoning the field?”
“The reason for their disheartenment lies here” said a soldier.
“Their commander Lord Bravermel has been fatally wounded by an enemy arrow.”
“We mustn't have a weak spot in our forces” said Errollorre. “May I borrow your Lordships horse?”
Before anyone could answer Errollorre mounted the steed and rode to the front of the line.
The sight of Errollorre on the commander's horse caused those on the battlefield to turn and move towards him to see what this was all about.
“I am Errollorre of the Palindromes” said Errollorre to the assembled troops.
“You can’t be Errollorre” yelled a man. “Everyone knows Errollorre is an idiot.
Errollorre turned the horse to face the man.
He slipped from the saddle and fell to the ground.
One of Errollorre’s feet got stuck in a stirrup.
The horse pranced back and forth in front of the troops dragging Errollorre through the mud and burnt grass.
“It is Errollorre!” shouted someone.
Troll ran over and lifted Errollorre up and back into the horse’s saddle.
“This is your moment!” shouted Errollorre. “You may think that you can run, but many years from now, as you lay dying in your beds, would you be willing to give all the days, from now until then, to have one chance, one chance to come back here and tell the enemy, that you can take our lives but you’ll never take our FREEDOM!”
“Wait a minute” said a soldier. “You mean many years from now we will die peacefully in our beds? That sounds pretty good to me.”
“Yeah me too” said another.
The assembled troops all began talking about how nice it would be to die old at home in a nice comfortable bed surrounded by loved ones.
The wizard Carl walked up and grabbed Errollorre.
“Get off that horse you fool” said Carl.
The wizard pulled Errollorre off the horse and then jumped up and sat himself in the saddle.
He turned the horse to face the jabbering horde.
“Alright listen up you pansies!” yelled the wizard Carl.
“If you don’t fight this battle today no one's going to die peacefully in their beds.”
“If we don’t stop the Witch Queen now she will only grow stronger. She we kill every one of you. Then she’ll kill your families. Then she’ll kill your dog. Your hamster. Your goldfish. She’ll tear up your gardens and paint your house an ugly color before she burns it.”
She’ll kill every living thing in Accasia. Then she’ll kill her own troops. Then when there is nothing left to kill or destroy she’ll kill herself.
She’s crazy. Trust me I know. So we stop her now. Pick up your weapons and prepare to attack.”
The troops were silent for a moment then the picked up their swords and weapons and began to let out cheers and screams.
They waved their arms and beat their shields.
This went on for several minutes.
Finally they noticed the Wizard Carl just sitting there staring at them so they quieted down.
“Are you finished now?” asked the wizard.
“Yeah I guess so” said a soldier.
“Look jumping around and howling like a bunch of drunken banshees is not going to help you fight. You’re wearing yourselves out.
Look at the enemy lines over there. They’ve never seen such a display of idiocy.
Now when we charge you can yell and scream. The adrenaline rush can help. You might even put a little fright into the bad guys.”
“Now is everyone calm and ready?”
“Yes sir!” shouted someone.
“Fine” said the wizard Carl. “Then CHARGE!”
With that Carl the wizard, Errollorre, Aria and Troll and the whole of the Accasian troops on the left flank of the line, charged at full speed towards the Witch Queens assembled forces.
Errollorre, Aria, the wizard Carl and Troll walked along a road that would lead them to the front lines of the battle against the Witch Queen and her armies.
“Night Star wasn’t very specific about where we were needed” said Errollorre.
“She has many responsibilities and much on her mind” said Aria.
“My advice is for us to join up with our forces left flank” said the wizard Carl.
“Quite often the right side and middle are strengthened but the left flank is neglected.”
“Troll used to being left” said Troll.
After hiking for several hours Errollorre and his party reached a clearing on a hill overlooking a large valley that lay several miles before the witch's castle.
There once was great forests here, but the witch's dragons had burned everything to cinders.
On the far hillside could be seen countless thousands of the witch's troops lined up and prepared for battle.
All manner of horrible creatures stood ready to attack and kill.
Errollorre and company was surprised to see the Accasian forces had broken its line and was in disarray.
Some soldiers wandered back as if they were abandoning the field.
As they walked closer they noticed several soldiers huddled around a body that lay beneath a tall white horse.
“What is happening here?” asked Errollore. “Why are the soldiers abandoning the field?”
“The reason for their disheartenment lies here” said a soldier.
“Their commander Lord Bravermel has been fatally wounded by an enemy arrow.”
“We mustn't have a weak spot in our forces” said Errollorre. “May I borrow your Lordships horse?”
Before anyone could answer Errollorre mounted the steed and rode to the front of the line.
The sight of Errollorre on the commander's horse caused those on the battlefield to turn and move towards him to see what this was all about.
“I am Errollorre of the Palindromes” said Errollorre to the assembled troops.
“You can’t be Errollorre” yelled a man. “Everyone knows Errollorre is an idiot.
Errollorre turned the horse to face the man.
He slipped from the saddle and fell to the ground.
One of Errollorre’s feet got stuck in a stirrup.
The horse pranced back and forth in front of the troops dragging Errollorre through the mud and burnt grass.
“It is Errollorre!” shouted someone.
Troll ran over and lifted Errollorre up and back into the horse’s saddle.
“This is your moment!” shouted Errollorre. “You may think that you can run, but many years from now, as you lay dying in your beds, would you be willing to give all the days, from now until then, to have one chance, one chance to come back here and tell the enemy, that you can take our lives but you’ll never take our FREEDOM!”
“Wait a minute” said a soldier. “You mean many years from now we will die peacefully in our beds? That sounds pretty good to me.”
“Yeah me too” said another.
The assembled troops all began talking about how nice it would be to die old at home in a nice comfortable bed surrounded by loved ones.
The wizard Carl walked up and grabbed Errollorre.
“Get off that horse you fool” said Carl.
The wizard pulled Errollorre off the horse and then jumped up and sat himself in the saddle.
He turned the horse to face the jabbering horde.
“Alright listen up you pansies!” yelled the wizard Carl.
“If you don’t fight this battle today no one's going to die peacefully in their beds.”
“If we don’t stop the Witch Queen now she will only grow stronger. She we kill every one of you. Then she’ll kill your families. Then she’ll kill your dog. Your hamster. Your goldfish. She’ll tear up your gardens and paint your house an ugly color before she burns it.”
She’ll kill every living thing in Accasia. Then she’ll kill her own troops. Then when there is nothing left to kill or destroy she’ll kill herself.
She’s crazy. Trust me I know. So we stop her now. Pick up your weapons and prepare to attack.”
The troops were silent for a moment then the picked up their swords and weapons and began to let out cheers and screams.
They waved their arms and beat their shields.
This went on for several minutes.
Finally they noticed the Wizard Carl just sitting there staring at them so they quieted down.
“Are you finished now?” asked the wizard.
“Yeah I guess so” said a soldier.
“Look jumping around and howling like a bunch of drunken banshees is not going to help you fight. You’re wearing yourselves out.
Look at the enemy lines over there. They’ve never seen such a display of idiocy.
Now when we charge you can yell and scream. The adrenaline rush can help. You might even put a little fright into the bad guys.”
“Now is everyone calm and ready?”
“Yes sir!” shouted someone.
“Fine” said the wizard Carl. “Then CHARGE!”
With that Carl the wizard, Errollorre, Aria and Troll and the whole of the Accasian troops on the left flank of the line, charged at full speed towards the Witch Queens assembled forces.
Chapter 25
Errollorre and Troll ran into the armies of the Witch Queen.
The Wizard Carl rode upon a white horse swinging a wet mop that doubled as his magic staff.
Aria flew a few feet above the ground and hovered over twenty of the witch’s elite Blacken Guard.
“Har, quit your fluttering little butterfly and come down and we will pin your wings to a book” said a huge ugly Blaken.
“Who me?” said Aria.
Aria gently touched down and the monstrous Blackens closed in on her.
She drew her sword and in one swift move sliced through two of the guards killing them instantly.
Picking up a second sword she spun, chopped, sliced and stabbed ten more of the Blacken.
She threw her sword at an archer who had put her in his sights.
The sword went deep into the archer killing him.
She did a somersault and picked up his bow.
“I remember this” thought Aria.
Picking up the archer's quiver Aria began to fire arrows at blinding speed killing the remaining Blacken and then mowing down the forces that Errollore, Troll and the wizard were fighting.
“Maybe we should just go home and let her kill them all” said Carl.
The foursome broke off from the rest of the attacking forces and made their way to the secret cave entrance to the castle.
A horde of pink gerbils ran from the entrance.
They were surprised when one of them stopped to speak with Errollorre.
“She’s all yours.”
Then they ran off squealing about donuts.
Errollorre and company made their way through the caves into the room of Jojopo.
“The witch was just here” said the wizard Carl. “I can still feel her presence.”
“Those gerbils somehow stopped her from escaping.” said Errollorre. “I suspect she is choosing to make her last stand in the throne room”
They made their way to the throne room to find the Witch Queen sitting there on her throne of skulls.
The sound of fighting and clashing swords, and of huge rocks being hurdled against the castle walls could be heard.
“Well I don’t suppose you are here to seek my surrender.” hissed the witch.
“Don’t worry, I’ll make it easy for you to do what you pretend to hate doing.”
The Witch Queen raised her hand and sent out a bolt of black lighting that hit Troll and snapped his neck in half.
Troll fell to the ground.
“No!” yelled Errollorre.
He charged the witch with sword drawn.
The witch raised her hand and released another bolt of black lightning.
But this bolt was blocked in midair by a bolt of white light coming from the hand of the wizard Carl.
Errollorre tried to rush the witch again but with her free hand she sent a small bolt of black lightning out at Errollorre sending him hurtling into the wall.
Aria rushed over to him to see if he was seriously injured.
“So Carlandar my old wizard beau” said the witch. “You choose to die in a magic fight. Ha ha”
The power from the witch seemed to push back the light from the wizard.
The roof of the throne room suddenly collapsed exposing the sky above.
The castle was being shattered by the attacks of the Accasian forces.
The black lightning from the witch pushed the wizard back.
He was about to be overcome when suddenly bursting through the door was an elf woman.
“Night Star!” said Aria.
Night Star threw her sword and it went deep into the chest of the Witch Queen.
The witch staggered. Then looked up with her black eyes and motioning with her hand caused Night Star to be lifted up off the floor.
Night Star hung suspended in the air gasping for breath and clutching her throat.
“Nice try elf” said the Witch Queen. “But you forget, I don’t have a heart.”
The witch pulled out the sword and threw it in the direction of the barely conscious and weakened wizard Carl.
Suddenly fire rained down upon the Witch Queen.
Above the throne room, in the open space made by the collapsed ceiling, hovered Sir Gordi upon the mighty dragon Sporky.
The witch though burned and badly wounded by the fire managed to conjure a protective force field around herself.
“You haven’t enough power in all of Accasia to stop me” screamed the witch.
She prepared to release a killing bolt of black lightening towards Gordi and the dragon when suddenly an arrow went through her forehead.
The Witch Queen looked to see that it was Aria, the one who she had tormented for so long, it was Aria that had fired the fatal shot.
The Witch Queen fell dead.
There was silence.
The armies of Accasia rounded up the last of the Witch Queen's forces.
The history books of Accasia were to record that the battle that day was won because of the participation of the brave Shedlanders who had unselfishly sacrificed to rid Accasia of evil.
“Gordi, Night Star, Errollorre, Aria, and Carl the Wizard stood over the body of Troll.
“We won a great victory but I don’t feel like celebrating.” said Errollore.
“Oooh” came a moan.
It came from Troll.
“Troll your alive!” yelled Errollorre. “How? The witch snapped your neck.”
“It was only first time this week” said Troll.
“Ha” laughed Gordi. “Come on let’s get back to the Shed. The first round is on me.”
“I haven’t thought about donuts for a long time” said Night Star. “But I think I’d enjoy one right now."
“Well that ain’t going to happen lass” said Gordi. “I left jacey guarding them.”
And they went off to live happily ever….
“Wait wait” said Centaur that suddenly ran up.
“I have a message for Night Star”
He handed her the message and ran off.
Well?” asked Errollorre.
“It’s from Syx” said Night Star. “He says there is something going on with ghost pirate ships”
“Here we go again” said Aria.
“After the drinks and food” said Gordi.
The End
Errollorre and Troll ran into the armies of the Witch Queen.
The Wizard Carl rode upon a white horse swinging a wet mop that doubled as his magic staff.
Aria flew a few feet above the ground and hovered over twenty of the witch’s elite Blacken Guard.
“Har, quit your fluttering little butterfly and come down and we will pin your wings to a book” said a huge ugly Blaken.
“Who me?” said Aria.
Aria gently touched down and the monstrous Blackens closed in on her.
She drew her sword and in one swift move sliced through two of the guards killing them instantly.
Picking up a second sword she spun, chopped, sliced and stabbed ten more of the Blacken.
She threw her sword at an archer who had put her in his sights.
The sword went deep into the archer killing him.
She did a somersault and picked up his bow.
“I remember this” thought Aria.
Picking up the archer's quiver Aria began to fire arrows at blinding speed killing the remaining Blacken and then mowing down the forces that Errollore, Troll and the wizard were fighting.
“Maybe we should just go home and let her kill them all” said Carl.
The foursome broke off from the rest of the attacking forces and made their way to the secret cave entrance to the castle.
A horde of pink gerbils ran from the entrance.
They were surprised when one of them stopped to speak with Errollorre.
“She’s all yours.”
Then they ran off squealing about donuts.
Errollorre and company made their way through the caves into the room of Jojopo.
“The witch was just here” said the wizard Carl. “I can still feel her presence.”
“Those gerbils somehow stopped her from escaping.” said Errollorre. “I suspect she is choosing to make her last stand in the throne room”
They made their way to the throne room to find the Witch Queen sitting there on her throne of skulls.
The sound of fighting and clashing swords, and of huge rocks being hurdled against the castle walls could be heard.
“Well I don’t suppose you are here to seek my surrender.” hissed the witch.
“Don’t worry, I’ll make it easy for you to do what you pretend to hate doing.”
The Witch Queen raised her hand and sent out a bolt of black lighting that hit Troll and snapped his neck in half.
Troll fell to the ground.
“No!” yelled Errollorre.
He charged the witch with sword drawn.
The witch raised her hand and released another bolt of black lightning.
But this bolt was blocked in midair by a bolt of white light coming from the hand of the wizard Carl.
Errollorre tried to rush the witch again but with her free hand she sent a small bolt of black lightning out at Errollorre sending him hurtling into the wall.
Aria rushed over to him to see if he was seriously injured.
“So Carlandar my old wizard beau” said the witch. “You choose to die in a magic fight. Ha ha”
The power from the witch seemed to push back the light from the wizard.
The roof of the throne room suddenly collapsed exposing the sky above.
The castle was being shattered by the attacks of the Accasian forces.
The black lightning from the witch pushed the wizard back.
He was about to be overcome when suddenly bursting through the door was an elf woman.
“Night Star!” said Aria.
Night Star threw her sword and it went deep into the chest of the Witch Queen.
The witch staggered. Then looked up with her black eyes and motioning with her hand caused Night Star to be lifted up off the floor.
Night Star hung suspended in the air gasping for breath and clutching her throat.
“Nice try elf” said the Witch Queen. “But you forget, I don’t have a heart.”
The witch pulled out the sword and threw it in the direction of the barely conscious and weakened wizard Carl.
Suddenly fire rained down upon the Witch Queen.
Above the throne room, in the open space made by the collapsed ceiling, hovered Sir Gordi upon the mighty dragon Sporky.
The witch though burned and badly wounded by the fire managed to conjure a protective force field around herself.
“You haven’t enough power in all of Accasia to stop me” screamed the witch.
She prepared to release a killing bolt of black lightening towards Gordi and the dragon when suddenly an arrow went through her forehead.
The Witch Queen looked to see that it was Aria, the one who she had tormented for so long, it was Aria that had fired the fatal shot.
The Witch Queen fell dead.
There was silence.
The armies of Accasia rounded up the last of the Witch Queen's forces.
The history books of Accasia were to record that the battle that day was won because of the participation of the brave Shedlanders who had unselfishly sacrificed to rid Accasia of evil.
“Gordi, Night Star, Errollorre, Aria, and Carl the Wizard stood over the body of Troll.
“We won a great victory but I don’t feel like celebrating.” said Errollore.
“Oooh” came a moan.
It came from Troll.
“Troll your alive!” yelled Errollorre. “How? The witch snapped your neck.”
“It was only first time this week” said Troll.
“Ha” laughed Gordi. “Come on let’s get back to the Shed. The first round is on me.”
“I haven’t thought about donuts for a long time” said Night Star. “But I think I’d enjoy one right now."
“Well that ain’t going to happen lass” said Gordi. “I left jacey guarding them.”
And they went off to live happily ever….
“Wait wait” said Centaur that suddenly ran up.
“I have a message for Night Star”
He handed her the message and ran off.
Well?” asked Errollorre.
“It’s from Syx” said Night Star. “He says there is something going on with ghost pirate ships”
“Here we go again” said Aria.
“After the drinks and food” said Gordi.
The End
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