OK, I really want to talk about racism from a personal level

Bigotry will, so long as we're all different in any fashion at all, continue on. Nature of the human condition, sorry to say.

We're tribalists. We're clannish. Always have been, always will be.

Individuals can, and do, work past that. But as a group? Good luck with that. I can't think of a single grouping of folks who aren't, in some fashion or form, bigoted to some degree or another.

Quite frankly, I don't see it ever dying out.

But it is getting better. Not by leaps and bounds, but a slow, sometimes painful, slog towards the light. Today is a little better than yesterday, tomorrow will be a little better than today.

Educate. Set an example. It's all any of us can do. You can not force someone to give up the hate, they have to want to give it up.

a reply to: GrantedBail

Wow, the ignorance of some people really beggars belief, I can't abide racism!! Don't beat yourself up, I think when you are under attack your first instinct is to correct any assumptions made, then think later, which you are obviously doing!

I don't encounter it so much lately but I used to work at a restaurant when I was young and a few of my colleagues were disgustingly racist for no apparent reason other than that's how they'd been raised. They could never give a reason for their hatred even when directly challenged.

a reply to: TrueBrit

I'm not sure I agree violence is the way to go! Often a bit of information helps though. I had an encounter with a Taxi driver a few weeks making some horribly xenophobic, sweeping comments about immigrants. I calmly presented some facts to him and his jaw dropped, he had literally never considered that what he had been reading in his morning Daily Fail may not be true! I don't know what happened after that but at the very least I planted a seed. If I'd just given him a slap, he may be shaken but he'd be none the wiser!

I'm mixed English and Trini and very light skinned. Have experienced racism from both sides having lived in both predominantly black and white areas as well as received abuse from people who don't know what to make of me and just pick a random place/ethnicity which is hilarious... everything from Arab to Asian to Oriental. It's very bizarre but it's forced me to not identify with any group and just take people as they come.

I have to say the most serious and violent racism was from white people but that was a long time ago, attitudes have changed a lot over the past couple of decades.

a reply to: GrantedBail

I just don't believe this story. Nobody does that.

a reply to: Murgatroid

Wrong. Mexico had possession of California a maximum of 20 years. They didn't even have enough interest in it when they did or the resources to keep it for that BRIEF stint.

If you had said Native Americans you would have been correct.

And SPANISH and RUSSIANS had more right to California land after the Natives. They were the settlers after the Natives.

Mexico??? Your ignorance of our States history is astounding. And the fact that you parroted a GIF animation to "prove" your point is even more hilarious.

originally posted by: GrantedBail
I am a white girl with olive skin. In the summer I can get really dark and I have lived at the beach my whole life. Living in Southern California. we have great weather and can stay tanned most of the year. As a woman I have went through many different hair colors. I have been every shade of blonde, brown, and even went through a period where I dyed my hair full on black. I have blue eyes and thought that would be fun. ok....

Well tonight on a poker site I play on regularly, there was girl I was playing with on one of the tables and she made a comment that: "You are black ewwwwww". First of all I thought: Really??? And then I told her I was a white girl with a tan and good hair. After I said that, I felt like wtf??? Then I felt bad for defending myself as a white person and not confronting her with her idiosy. I quit playing poker and haven't felt good since then.

It reminds me of another time when I was coming out of the hair salon with dark brown hair and dark skin with my son. I was trying to cross the parking lot with my son and some old white women yelled at me out of her car window, "Go back to Mexico". This was in San Clemente CA, the most liberal place in South County.

This was a few years ago.

Really, has it come to this.

So sad.

1 ) I don't know many white women that describe themselves as "white girls"...just saying

2) "Good hair" ? Again, I don't know many white women that use that term...black women do though

3) You were on a poker site? Someone looked at a photo?

4) You got confused for a Mexican?


Are you sure you're white? Are you making things up to stir the pot? How accurate is this story.

Methinks something is amiss here

in your avatar you definitely look like a person of color, that does not mean someone should yell racial slurs at you. people say racism doesn't exist but look around on forums and websites like youtube, liveleak and tmz comments where the lowest common denominator seem to congregate and you will see how cowardly the keyboard racists are, quick to berate minorities when they cannot be seen or identified.

You lost ALL credibility as soon as you said this:

originally posted by: BatheInTheFountain
Are you sure you're white? Are you making things up to stir the pot?

As far as sources go, mine came from a professor emeritus at LSU and data from Bureau of Indian Affairs maps.

You gave no source, I think it's obvious why...

originally posted by: Murgatroid
You lost ALL credibility as soon as you said this:

originally posted by: BatheInTheFountain
Are you sure you're white? Are you making things up to stir the pot?

As far as sources go, mine came from a professor emeritus at LSU and data from Bureau of Indian Affairs maps.

You gave no source, I think it's obvious why...

Huh??? What are you babbling about?

a reply to: GrantedBail

Well you were right to feel weird defending yourself. That's what most people forget. Racism is a perspective...not just an act or words. Saying you're the victim of racism is just playing their game. The thoughts of assailant and victim occur on the same wavelength.

It has only "come to this" because of your perception. The color of your skin doesn't mean anything. But since you started a thread you feel otherwise (#veryrespectfully ).

...and at this day in age everyone has been bonking everyone for so long that it's hard to tell who is what anymore.

I made my original comment from my cellphone, where people's Avatars aren't visible. Now I'm on my laptop and see your photo.

Yeah, you look Southern European and have curly hair. I'm mostly Portuguese and tan easily too.

So you ran up against some ignorant people. It happens.

if OP was black some comments would be along the lines of "playing the race card", "black people are the actual racists", "taken out of context", "race bait thread", "racism is a myth"


imagine this... whats an insult for one, is reality for others...

originally posted by: BatheInTheFountain
I made my original comment from my cellphone, where people's Avatars aren't visible. Now I'm on my laptop and see your photo.

Yeah, you look Southern European and have curly hair. I'm mostly Portuguese and tan easily too.

So you ran up against some ignorant people. It happens.

you would fall in the same category as those ignorant people. because a: you thought something is a miss because her avatar cant be seen on your phone, or she referred to herself as a white person, or what she said about her hair only black women make such comments... white people dont say they have good or nice hair i guess.
youre in fact the ignorant one... pointing out she ran up ignorant people. from your comments because her lack of avatar made her racially ambiguous from your phone, you made assumptions.... keep denying ignorance.

a reply to: GrantedBail

There are a lot of ignorant idiots in this world. Don't let them get to you.

I'm in a bi-racial marriage. After 29 yrs i still haven't been fully accepted by her family. It's not any verbal remarks, but their actions that are obvious. I just smile and try to kill them with kindness.

call me whatever you like but this is a pity party.

This is a bully who threw an insult.

a reply to: GrantedBail

Then I felt bad for defending myself as a white person and not confronting her with her idiosy. I quit playing poker and haven't felt good since then.

Why stop playing a game you enjoy just because of someone's childish and idiotic comment? Let the person know how childish they sound and continue playing. I don't play online games so I don't know how they work. Could you change the people you play with on the site? If so, do that and just enjoy yourself.

a reply to: GrantedBail

It's those little everyday slights that keep most Blk folks on edge this is something we learn to live with, though not always successfully , for example a job interview can be very stressful, you try to remain confident knowing you have to compete with others who may have more creds than you, better dressed,better prepared etc, so you do your best to over come all that but the one thing you may not over come is what you look like..you may or may not get the job but if you don't there is always that lil question ..I wonder if this wasn't a black thing.
As to how I handle it, I remove any doubt by being self employed, not everyone is prepared to do that and there is no way I can shield myself from other aspect of it, however I still give folks the benefit of doubt until proven wrong.

One thing many people don't realize is that "white people" is a social designation that varies depending on the region. So a lot of people who are "white" in one region or country may not be considered "white" in another. Just as I, a "black" man in America, would not be considered "black" in South Africa. I'd be considered "colored" because I'm actually multiracial, while "black" only refers to 100% Africans there. And many Korean & Chinese people are much lighter skinned than many European and American "white" people, but they still aren't considered "white" in the West.

Either way, I'm sorry for your experience. Maybe you can take this experience to heart the next time you see or hear about similar situations. (I believe that a lot of times, we experience hardships so we can learn how to empathize with others who are in similar or worse situations.)

originally posted by: jellyrev
call me whatever you like but this is a pity party.

This is a bully who threw an insult.

One of the great things about humankind is that we evolved or were created as social creatures. When we help each other, we can can achieve things that we simply can't achieve alone. I see nothing wrong with someone having a "pity party" if that's what it takes to help them get back on their feet.

I actually think that's one of the few great things about "social media" and online forums. They allow people to show support for others even when we're separated by vast physical boundaries. How amazing is that? We now have the power to brighten people's moods, inspire them to pursue a dream, or even talk them out of committing suicide even if we've never met and they're physically on the other side of the world! That's incredible! Even the Prophets of old didn't have this power! Mix in online translation tools and we can literally exert this gift of encouraging each other to anyone with an internet connection!

Of course, there are always those who choose to abuse this incredible gift we have. But I think that says more about them than it does about the rest of us.

Racism has always been used to keep man divided. Some people will even claim you are racist if you don't know, by looking at a person, from whence they came. Either Chinese or Japanese? Really, who knows? Or African? Here, I have a good video that can test if you are a racist or not: