Relationships are overrated

a reply to: Elysian

I think really you feel the opposite and long for the right kind of company and this is a defence mechanism at work to avoid emotional pain and feelings of loneliness (that are the most normal feelings in the world to have).

I think you are bereft of relationships to the point that you are making up characters in your mind to keep you company in all the boredom.

The better way is to simmer down and find a nice boyfriend/girlfriend and enjoy the beauty and company of a relationship.

You seem to adopt an aggressive stance that will put people off. Don't be so instantly challenging. I'm giving this advice to myself at the same time as you, believe it.

a reply to: Revolution9
I have been single for 18trs. I was lucky enough to raise 2 boys to adult hood alone. I am male and it is unusual for a male single parent because a lot just 'settle' for the sake of the kids. My kids are balanced and full of empathy and understanding. I am quite proud of my achievements with my children.
I needed no female to help me make my decisions about life. I didn't wake up feeling lonely. I might have had my children to stop me being lonely but I don't now. They are away having their own life.
The point being is I find I have better relationships with everyone and enjoy the freedoms I have

I believe there is things worse than being alone and the main one is being with the wrong one.

originally posted by: awareness10
a reply to: Elysian

Yes, you're right. But only idiots watch tv programming believing it. Those who are 'awake' can't be affected by it anymore. The impact is gone, because, you're aware of it now. I admit i do watch movies, however i only watch them with the purpose of pointing out things they've added with the intent of hypnotizing the public.

Wow...you sound like a hoot!

originally posted by: Revolution9
a reply to: Elysian

I think really you feel the opposite and long for the right kind of company and this is a defence mechanism at work to avoid emotional pain and feelings of loneliness (that are the most normal feelings in the world to have).

I think you are bereft of relationships to the point that you are making up characters in your mind to keep you company in all the boredom.

The better way is to simmer down and find a nice boyfriend/girlfriend and enjoy the beauty and company of a relationship.

You seem to adopt an aggressive stance that will put people off. Don't be so instantly challenging. I'm giving this advice to myself at the same time as you, believe it.

Quoted for agreement. I was quite put off by your post. If this is how you are coming across in dates then its no suprise that nothing happened. You guys need to relax and enjoy life. Not everything is a conspiracy and not every girl is a b*tch trying to cheat on you.

Im 40 and have only been with 5 girls. But every one was a long term relationship and they were all great. I used to be very agressive about women/dates as well and thats why i never got anywhere with them till my early 20s, when i had my eyes opened to what girls are attracted to. Just relax. And yes...relationships are def worth it.

a reply to: Elysian

Dont take this the wrong way but you've only been here 5 days and started 5 threads. I get what you mean about keeping up with your thoughts. Maybe its time to slow down and actually listen to the other person - let them get a word in.

Maybe try actively listening to the other person. I only suggest this from what little I have seen. I could be wrong. Relationships are worth it but it does take work.

I have learned there is more to this life than paring up with another individual. A huge and I do mean tremendous weight has been lifted off me by realizing this.

originally posted by: awareness10
a reply to: Elysian

Yes, you're right. But only idiots watch tv programming believing it. Those who are 'awake' can't be affected by it anymore. The impact is gone, because, you're aware of it now. I admit i do watch movies, however i only watch them with the purpose of pointing out things they've added with the intent of hypnotizing the public.

the hypnotic effect no longer effects me because i'm aware of it.

the gnostics became aware of it, in some sense to know it was all bs.

Bit OTT don't you think?

I'll never actively look for a partner if I can help it, can't be bothered by the drama and games, if it happens organically, cool see how it goes, if not, then fine, i've lived 95% of my adult life without a sidekick, it's normal to me *shrugs*

a reply to: Elysian

Given the choice wouldn't you want your ideal partner rather than settling?

I blame romance movies for this. There is no "ideal" partner. No prince in shining armour...we are all just people. The trick is finding someone that you love in spite of the little things that they do that annoy us. You have to learn to accept the good with the bad....nobody is ideal.

Alone forever because hey , thats how its meant to be.

With all due respect....this is just you feeling sorry for yourself.

I mean my kinks aren't exactly extreme. Im relatively tame in that regard, its not like I need someone to be more than themselves. And you would thinks guys would be more inclined to the adventurous stuff

All you have to do is find someone with the same interests....trust me when I say this...they are out there. Be who you are...no matter what you are into...there are lots of us guys that like an adventurous lady....you obviously just haven't found him yet.

DON'T GIVE UP!!

It would also be nice to have a relationship with someone who can keep up with my thoughts

This is one area I have found that you quite simply can't settle for less. You have to talk to each other some time...and that conversation has to be meaningful and stimulating for both....if it's not....doesn't matter how good the rest of it is...sooner or later it's gonna fall apart.

why should I have to dumb myself down?

You shouldn't...not for anyone...ever.

yes im arrogant, but at least I admit it which is more than can be said for most people

I don't see the arrogance...but reading text can be a hit and miss when it comes to emotions or intent.

Sounds to me like you know what you want...you're just frustrated cause you haven't found it yet. Fair enough...we all have days like that.

I feel ya girl.

a reply to: Elysian

Being single is great man

...when dating a typical night can involve dinner (50 bucks maybe), a movie (25 bucks), go back home and have some of the most boring conversation ever then start over again with a new girl hoping to find a decent one.

... when in a relationship a typical month can involve birthday gifts for people you don't know, weddings for people you don't know, family outings for people you don't care to know, arguments for things you don't know, anxiety on facebook from people you don't know but just her "friends" telling her they had a great night with her last night, spending thousands of dollars for her problems that you don't understand and having sex once a month while imagining people you don't know.

So in the end: make love to yourself, and buy video games, boats, cool cars and whatever else you can because you will be happy and confident and if you need sex that bad hire a hooker for about the same price as date night.

I hope I have offended some couples today.

Just kidding...this is just for fun....but being single does rock and I don't ever see myself settling down again...ever.

originally posted by: rockpaperhammock
a reply to: Elysian

Being single is great man

...when dating a typical night can involve dinner (50 bucks maybe), a movie (25 bucks), go back home and have some of the most boring conversation ever then start over again with a new girl hoping to find a decent one.

... when in a relationship a typical month can involve birthday gifts for people you don't know, weddings for people you don't know, family outings for people you don't care to know, arguments for things you don't know, anxiety on facebook from people you don't know but just her "friends" telling her they had a great night with her last night, spending thousands of dollars for her problems that you don't understand and having sex once a month while imagining people you don't know.

So in the end: make love to yourself, and buy video games, boats, cool cars and whatever else you can because you will be happy and confident and if you need sex that bad hire a hooker for about the same price as date night.

I hope I have offended some couples today.

Just kidding...this is just for fun....but being single does rock and I don't ever see myself settling down again...ever.

To be honest. Both rock. Being single is amazing as long as you are not feeling lonely and dont wish you had another half but i have been with my wife for 11 years and i can honestly say ive loved every year and it only feels like 4 years

a reply to: 3danimator2014

You are a lucky man brother...id say about 10% of people fall into your category. Congrats...some people just have it in them or maybe you just truly find your soul mate if that exists.

a reply to: Elysian

you're right they are overated...ive been single for 4 years now, and even the thought of going out on a date gaves me the sweats, i had got to a point where i thought i was looking, but when the opportunity to go on a date presented itself i shirked away from it.

I think ive been single that long now that i have gotten used to being on my own, enjoying my own company, can fart when i want, dont have to shave my legs EVERYDAY, can have the tv remote all to myself and dont need to share my bed...so being single does have its upsides

I do however miss snuggles, and of course sex...but thats not really high on any priority list for me

if you are lonely...look for a mate ...if you arent, fly it solo!

originally posted by: rockpaperhammock
a reply to: 3danimator2014

You are a lucky man brother...id say about 10% of people fall into your category. Congrats...some people just have it in them or maybe you just truly find your soul mate if that exists.

I am lucky, i know that. But i also think that im very easy going, hard working and dont get strseed about things easily...this makes forging relationships easier. I wasnt always like this, i had to learn ...as we all do. The learning never stops

a reply to: TheConstruKctionofLight

Letting other people get a word in is easy, staying interested in their trivial nonsense however is tedious.

You want to talk sports, my mind will wander
You want to talk about pop culture my mind will wander
You want to talk about a movie or tv series my mind will wander
If the word Rap comes out of your mouth and lacks negative connotation, im going to stop you right there
I love martial arts but if you mention MMA im going to stop you right there.

And be myself is the biggest joke ive ever heard next to people claiming they can see fakes

Behaving in a way that is fake is the only reason I have "friends"
And they are bottom of the barrel at best. # they tried to hypnotize me once after getting me high on edibles.
Trying to change who I am.
# you

If you're an asshole and you treat me like # daily yet you think I actually like you're company, you cant see fake for #.

As for being myself
I practice swordsmanship
I own 3 swords
2 machetes and several knives
I practice on a consistent basis with bokken and wasters.

And thats usually enough to make people take a step back from me

If anyone took the time to get to know ME they would know that im not confrontational.
They would know that people yelling makes me cry. Dont even have to be yelling at me, you could be 3 rooms down. Being accused of doing something I didnt do or being someone im not makes me cry. A person being injured in my presence makes me as useless as an infant when I curl up into the fetal position and sob.

The real me is unwanted unloved and going to die alone.
Meanwhile the fake me has "friends" and has obnoxious assholes hitting on me left and right and even has people straight up offering money for sex.

Be yourself
What a #ing joke

a reply to: Elysian

What kind of limp, pathetic individual cannot appreciate a decent assortment of bladed objects? Where do you find these guys?

Personally speaking, I really love edged weapons. Steel before lead, any day of the week!

a reply to: TrueBrit

Because limp pathetic individuals, nothing more to say.

Where? Craigslist... im uncomfortable with introducing myself to someone in person... or having a conversation in person with someone i dont know... so yeah... i dont usually meet people in bars or cafes

I have a swept-hilt rapier, a Musashi brand katana, and a kodachi of unclear brand and origins though a magnificent weapon with an equally amazing feel and aura.

two kukri style machetes

several decorative knives (pretty to look at)
A fighting knife with single finger ring guard (which is illegal in california, but i bought in arizona, so i just have to keep it out of view)

I have been married for 18 years and it is the best relationship ever.

Sorry to hear some of you are disillusioned.

a reply to: Elysian

Well... Craigslist is not a good tool for searching for souls compatible with yours. It really is not much use for anything important in my experience.

Look... I do not know who hurt you, or how, or why. What I do know, is that the worst way to look for a potential mate, is through a communication medium which does not allow you to access more than half of the non verbal communication that passes between human beings.

Awful as it may seem, it does you no favours to allow your fear of interpersonal interaction, to stand between you and potential happiness. Go out, have a coffee somewhere new, go to the library, or a bar... get out there!

Your collection sounds lovely by the way!

originally posted by: TrueBrit
a reply to: Elysian

Well... Craigslist is not a good tool for searching for souls compatible with yours. It really is not much use for anything important in my experience.

Look... I do not know who hurt you, or how, or why. What I do know, is that the worst way to look for a potential mate, is through a communication medium which does not allow you to access more than half of the non verbal communication that passes between human beings.

Awful as it may seem, it does you no favours to allow your fear of interpersonal interaction, to stand between you and potential happiness. Go out, have a coffee somewhere new, go to the library, or a bar... get out there!

Your collection sounds lovely by the way!

I like to think so
I love my swords

a reply to: Elysian

What I want to know, is why is it that all the ladies with badass hobbies seem to be in the states?