What do I seek? I have no idea...

Hello, ATS. You may call me what you wish, but I refer to myself as Rain. This is not my first account. My other is LucidWarrior, but I felt that I was not able to live up to that name, and so chose to use one more apt until such a time as I can truly claim it. I am here on ATS because I have questions, I have begun the Journey. Unfortunately, I feel no progress, only an ever increasing sensation that I am a child floundering in the deep end, and sinking, fast. I have the Will to swim, but Will, as I can attest, is not nearly enough. I have cracked open the doors, but for whatever reason cannot open them further. Is there something on the other side blocking it, or am I simply pushing the wrong way? The infuriating thing is, I know the ability to swim is somewhere inside, but I cannot reach it. I live life without fullfilling my own potential, sometimes because of myself, and sometimes in spite of myself. I am discontent to live in this world as Society expects me too, but the problem is I have no idea on how I want to live. As a result, I waste away. Days are spent passing the time, instead of capitalizing on it. I am squandering myself, and I grow tired of it, and yet still find myself doing the same old things. In this, I would like to echo PageLC14 in that I invite each member to share with me and all ATS, anything you wish, be it advice, words to remember, or just random nonsense. I assure you, it will be received on my end by as open a mind as I am able to maintain.
Moving on. I will participate in any thread that I feel I have something to add to it, an I will read any thread that sufficiently catches my interest. I will most heavily be in the mysterious subjects and science&technology forums. Well, I think that's about it for now. Thanks for listening to my ramblings, and have a great day, everyone.

a reply to: 5leepingWarrior

Unfortunately, I feel no progress, only an ever increasing sensation that I am a child floundering in the deep end, and sinking, fast.

Rest assured the doubt with the old way of thinking is normal. We all have been raised to think the way we are supposed to, only a few are fortunate or blessed enough to see something wrong with that.

Don't trip about not being sure, the unsureness is the good part, it keeps us open to alternatives.

Its okay to not know, even harder to admit it, which you just did so well.

Be patient about discovering, life is life long, that desire you have will see you through.

Well I had a huge reply typed out but my phone went whacko on me so I'm just gonna say welcome, again. Enjoy the ride

Then YOU are the same as we all.
I go by my gut,it's worked to some degree SO far.

Seek nothing and you will not be disappointed.

Welcome to ATS.

a reply to: 5leepingWarrior

Rain falls where it may, no need to seek a place to be. Rain with a purpose will nurture, rain without will simply drown.

a reply to: 5leepingWarrior

Awakening is a process, and it hurts. The maze is their to protect you, there is no exit, the deeper you get the less sane youll become, the only exit is the same way you got in. To get thru the maze you must learn that the maze never existed
The same maze is there to protect you, you have to ask yourself do i really wanna know? arent the ideals better? The fantasies about atlantis and ancient knowledge, dream about reaching the stars? Enjoying a sunday night football and a barbeque.

Do what you want to do, dont let anyone stop you, but i wouldnt recommend "awakening" to anyone who has lived by the boundaries of a society his whole life.

The only reason you want to know is out of curiosity, make a purpose in life instead, helping another, dont be afraid is my advice we all die eventually.

a reply to: 5leepingWarrior Welcome SleepingWarrior/Rain

a reply to: 5leepingWarrior Welcome.

a reply to: suruptileous a reply to: reldra
Thank you.
A reply to: Temudjin Thanks for the interesting feedback. Curiosity is a large part( I'll be putting a thread up on curiosity later) but not all of it. As I stated earlier, I am discontent to live as society at large expects me too. The ideals, I admit, are fun and entertaining, but if that's all I sought I doubt I'd be here on ATS. 'Awakening is a process, and it hurts.' No pain, no gain, right?
a reply to: soulpowertothendegree Thank you...That actually makes quite a deal of sense, and certainly applies to me. I shall keep that in the fore of my mind.
a reply to: butcherguy That's quite similar to one of my mottos: Expect nothing, and you won't be disappointed.
a reply to: cavtrooper7 Indeed, I've come to learn that ones first instinct is most often correct.
a reply to: PageLC14 Aw, drat! I hate it when that happens. Anyway, thanks.
a reply to: intrptr Thanks. ''Don't trip about not being sure, it keeps us open to alternatives' Wow, you nailed it on the head there. I often do trip because I'm not sure about something, but I sure do see the wisdom in that. That's another thing I'll have to keep in mind. Also, 'Life is Life-long' that is so easy to forget, isnt it? At once you've managed to inspire and reassure me, thank you.

a reply to: 5leepingWarrior

You only need to feel the void. Easier said than done however.

Dont doubt too much, you should rely on your instincts, not your beliefs or expectations, if you have too much doubts, you will end up like the hopeless skeptics which cannot go forward anymore because of the mind knots they created within themselves.

Hello SleepingWarrior, welcome to your new conspiracy abode. Usually one of the nice mods will visit your intro thread and throw a bunch of nice links at you... but it looks like you haven't been haven't been visited yet.

Here is the main page for Board Business & Questions. As you can see there are lot's of sticky threads at the top. Most of those are general resource threads, FAQs, and basic help for new users (linking, embedding, etc).
www.abovetopsecret.com...

There is also a user messaging sub-system for private messages to other ATS users.
There is also a user upload space which you can upload your avatars or images.

Oh, and don't forget the Terms & Conditions! You should learn the T&C! Don't learn the hard way like I did! Basically, you will do very well on ATS if you just remember to be cordial, to be fair and no personal attacks.
www.abovetopsecret.com...

Content is king here on ATS and there are forums here designed especially for your craziest conspiracy ideas.. first is the Skunkworks www.abovetopsecret.com...

and the other is the Gray Area www.abovetopsecret.com...

That about sums it up. We all welcome you to ATS and hope that you find what it is that you are looking for

Sayonara Jupiter

best of luck to you!