The Screaming At Wal-Mart

Dear Parents Who Shop At Wal-Mart....

You remember it like it was yesterday. You were in labor, or you were watching your wife/partner/significant other (trying to get my PC down) suffer through labor and emotions were high. You hoped and prayed for 9 months that you would bring your own healthy progeny into this world. Progeny who was not only healthy, but had all of their fingers and toes, and was cute as a button as well.

Labor was scary and all you can really remember afterwards are those tense moments in between your child being delivered and their first Hello World SCREAM! Those were and always are tense moments. It's seems like eons in the moment and the relief you feel upon hearing it, can not be measured with anything. Not even a quick and witty analogy.

You know what other people DON'T want to hear from your progeny after their birth??? I'll give you a second while the theme song from Jeopardy plays in your head.....

If you said "Not My Child Screaming Bloody Murder In Wal-Mart While You Are Standing In Line With 50 Registers Available And only 3 Open For 45 Minutes For $500 And The Win Kanga"... You're a winner!!

I'm beginning to think that China is spraying all of their products they ship to Wal-Mart with some kind of sinister "Making Children Scream Pheremone" as their way of sticking it to the man and making the US pay for buying their cheap knock off products. Who can blame them? Really...

But seriously... Wth people? How can you stand there and not even hear that your curtain climbing, crumb toters, are screaming at decibels that make banshees look like Bob Ross on an especially relaxed "Happy Tree" day?? By all rights, you should have blood seeping out of your ears from puncture wounds caused by the sheer sound that is directed towards you for not listening to why they need that 15th pack of gum by the foot for the day.

Why are you ignoring it? You will cave before you pay for your goods. You always do and that's why they always act like home training is a concept born out of some spirit killing boot camp. As if a single no from your mouth had the ability to snap the wings off the faerie folk with enough force to clear a four lane highway.

They throw themselves on the ground where millions of other toddlers have taken up the cause before..... eyes as dry as the Sahara but mouth open large enough for small woodland creatures to travel in and out of freely. You don't see it or hear it, but oddly enough EVERYONE else in the store does. Nobody wants to hear that cry you waited so long to hear in the delivery room. They either experienced it themselves or chose not to because they have seen enough out of your kids to turn them away from ever bearing a child.

You are the best form of birth control there is and sometimes I don't know whether to go to the fitness section and get some Joe Weider products to throw at you or thank you for helping keep the population down ever so slightly.

I guess that's the end of my rant. Let me be clear that I am not talking about infants needing to be fed here or kids who have been hurt somehow. I am talking about your preschoolers and up that you have apparently ignored since they were infants and have become a pro at tuning them out. Not everyone has or can do that. Your lack of respect for everyone around you is a sight to behold and I can hardly wait until your children grow up to produce even more constant screams until the whole world has just become deaf. I suppose then, they can just start lobbing snack packs at the walls in silent protest.

And for those who say quit going to Wal-Mart... If I didn't run into it everywhere else, that may be a good solution. But no. It's a pandemic of epic proportions. It's just so many more of them at Wal-Mart from my experience.

ETA - That yes... I am a mother.

That should be posted in every store. Maybe get John Cleese to recite it and put in on DVD. Then take the DVD and pipe it through the sound system in Wally World. They should sell the Seven Sacred Daggers of Tel Megiddo that can kill the Antichrist or bring pigs into the store so you can cast out the demons into them. A cheap child sized muzzle will also work. You can also give brochures of planned parenthood to the mothers and fathers of these banshies. Sneak a box of rubbers into their shopping cart for added effect.

Awwww. I saw Bob Ross and the happy tree. I used to watch his shows with the granddaughter and then we would get hypnotized and paint. I didn't know I could paint.

Relax and think about the fluffy clouds when you shop there. Think of how nice it will be to escape out that door after you get finished at the register.

I can't handle Walmart lines, I shop at the smaller stores.

a reply to: Kangaruex4Ewe

this behavior use to be the exception. now it is the normal. when i was young, my parents would take the belt to us if we got out of line. it worked. me and my siblings were well behaved children and are well adjusted adults. no sense in making a scene.

note: there is a difference between discipline and abuse. two swats on the backside is all it takes.

a reply to: LOSTinAMERICA

Excellent ideas!! They would probably all fail, but it might make the rest of us feel a bit better and a little less stressed for just one moment in time.

originally posted by: subfab
a reply to: Kangaruex4Ewe

this behavior use to be the exception. now it is the normal. when i was young, my parents would take the belt to us if we got out of line. it worked. me and my siblings were well behaved children and are well adjusted adults. no sense in making a scene.

note: there is a difference between discipline and abuse. two swats on the backside is all it takes.

I couldn't agree more. We were allowed to have some very small "acting out" behavior at home behind closed doors, but we always knew better than to pull the slightest stunt out in public. The punishment was exponentially higher. I have never had to leave a store or a restaurant because my daughter was making a scene. That wasn't dumb luck by any stretch.

Kids will act out on occasion and some small bit of it should be allowed at the proper time and place so that they can learn to deal with it. After all.... We all get angry. By acting out in small ways, I am not saying tantrums or getting mouthy, but crying and expressing displeasure. It shouldn't all be shut down else one can't learn to cope properly. But there is a time and place for everything.

And what is really sad as that you and I both had to "clarify" in the EXTREME so others wouldn't think we were abusive. That alone says we have a problem IMO.

There is nothing wrong at all with teaching children some self control. If not then you have adults that lack it and that leads to major problems.

a reply to: Kangaruex4Ewe

I suggest that you go to the store manager and explain why you won't be returning to his store again to shop. Because it's not the topic of the thread, I won't give you other reasons why you shouldn't shop there.

a reply to: Kangaruex4Ewe

But seriously... Wth people? How can you stand there and not even hear that your curtain climbing, crumb toters, are screaming at decibels that make banshees look like Bob Ross on an especially relaxed "Happy Tree" day?? By all rights, you should have blood seeping out of your ears from puncture wounds caused by the sheer sound that is directed towards you for not listening to why they need that 15th pack of gum by the foot for the day.

This can also be applied to restaurants

Parents, eating places are just for that, eating
We DO NOT care to see your kid running around and around screaming
Nor do we like our booth constantly being kicked and the kid standing in the booth staring down at us

We will and we have spoken up about it before when we shouldn't have to

Kids are to be 'seen NOT heard'
Nor are they to take off through a store like they are on a field track

Back in my parents day, it reflected badly on them,as parents, to have unruly kids
Needless to say, we were not unruly
(nothing a swift kick under the table couldn't stop)

It would have embarrassed my Mom for us to act out like kids do now a days

And gawd forbid if you say something, which we will if we have to


Control your kids people!!

Discipline your child so the prison system doesn't have do it later in life!!!

That's a million dollar bumper sticker right there!

a reply to: Kangaruex4Ewe


Also would like to add that with the smart phones now, Mom's ignore their kids due to the fact they can't put the damn phone down for 5 seconds!!!!!!!

Pay attention Mom to what your kid is doing and/or saying
Put the phone away!!!!!

a reply to: snarky412

You are bang on with the mobile phone issue.

I was on the bus with my friend the other day, on the way to another friends place for partying purposes, and sitting across from us was a well dressed, well groomed lady, with a baby in a stroller. She was completely engrossed in her phone, so much so that she missed what was both an amazing display of balance and motor function, and a moment of significant danger to her child. Basically, for about a mile of the journey, this infant child stood up in the stroller seat, and stretched up with his tiny little fingers, and explored the "stop" button on the hand rail.

Now, I was impressed. I have to say, I did not think that an infant would have the dexterity and balance to stand unaided on an uneven surface, while the surface was subject to turning forces, acceleration, and deceleration forces, without taking a serious spill. There were a couple of moments when my friend and I were half ready to reach out to catch the child and prevent a serious injury in the event of his falling out of the stroller head first. The mother knew nothing of this apparently, having been messaging back and forth with someone during the whole of the journey.

Now, on the one hand, displays of dexterity of that nature at that age are a sure sign of a prodigious future in sports and other activities requirIng such masterful control over ones body. That infant could do really well in the future at climbing if you ask me. Has the necessary grip and balance for it in any case, and mark my words, physical activity should be encouraged from as early as possible, to promote good cardiovascular health and the development of strong bones, healthy lung function, and so on and so forth. On the other hand, none of that will matter a God damn, if the mother cannot keep her tot from managing to some how stove in its own head, while she has her nose buried in the dataverse, discussing some inconsequential nonsense with a friend!

So can we add to the screaming child issue, that parents should be attentive enough that at no point do other people on a bus or in a public place, feel like they may have to spring into action at any moment, to prevent impending subdural hematoma and other related brain injuries, befalling their child? We all have a responsibility to help one another out, but if you are going to have a child, it is best to pay the proper attention to their physical safety, and rely on others to help you in the event of unforeseen and unforeseeable events, not the events which were pretty much a dead cert to happen, but were summarily ignored in favour of tweeting!

a reply to: TrueBrit

You should have screamed, "Watch out!" Maybe the mother would have been so startled she would have dropped her phone.

a reply to: TrueBrit

We can definitely agree with that. I've seen them standing in the buggies at the grocery store like that.... It was to that point where I could almost hear/feel the child's skull cracking in the cement floor. That makes me so angry. And yes... They are the same parents on the phones with the kids screaming bloody murder.

I just don't get it. I don't. If kids interfere in one's life that much, maybe people should rethink their decisions beforehand.

a reply to: Tangerine

Perhaps so.

I think the sheer incredulity that the situation inspired in my friend and I, had stifled our ability to exclaim in such a fashion!

a reply to: Kangaruex4Ewe

The thing is that on top of the child being at risk, all his fancy skills and impressiveness were entirely lost on the mother! She has no idea that her child will grow up to be Spider-Man!

a reply to: TrueBrit

You are bang on with the mobile phone issue.

Let me tell you what my husband did not to long ago

The Mom and her kid was sitting behind us at lunch where we were eating
She was texting on the damn phone

The poor boy about 5-6 yo kept trying to talk to her and finally he was saying "Momma" over and over getting louder and louder trying to get her attention
Finally my husband turned around, looked at her and said, "Ma'am....Ma'am.... I think your son needs you more than that phone does. He's been trying to get your attention for the last 10-15 minutes now give it to him"

She just kinda blinked at him, didn't say nothing but she DID put the phone down
For maybe 5 minutes. LOL

People are so oblivious to their additions of smart phones

The next generation will have no social skills thanks to technology
(and parents)

I was in a store once watching a contest between mum and toddler.

Toddler said if he didn't get the chocolate bar he would hold his breath. So he did.

Mum looked really worried so I said to her, "You know he can't actually hurt himself. The worst that can happen is that he slumps down on the floor unconscious. At this point his breathing will return to normal. Then you just pick him up and toss him into the trolley with the groceries. Personally, I would give him two whacks on his butt but either one works."

Mum replied, "OK if you're sure." We both watched. Took the kid 20 seconds to realize the gig was up. If looks could kill, the little kid would have had me.

The problem today, is that too many people are too scared to say something to the parent. I'm not.

P

originally posted by: TrueBrit
a reply to: Kangaruex4Ewe

The thing is that on top of the child being at risk, all his fancy skills and impressiveness were entirely lost on the mother! She has no idea that her child will grow up to be Spider-Man!

Yes, I'm sure she'll miss most of life while she fixates on her cell phone. In fact, much of an entire generation will likely do so. However, it sounds like the child will take a different path.

a reply to: snarky412

The sad thing about that??? In another year or two she will get him his own phone in hopes that he will leave her more alone so she can do what she wants to do on her phone. This the cycle...

I'm convinced that's why I see most 10 year olds waking around with iPhones.

a reply to: Kangaruex4Ewe

I've stopped inviting a friend to dinner because he can not get through a meal without taking or making a phone call. Yes, I told him why I'd no longer invite him.

a reply to: Tangerine

Well... That's right. The only reason you invite someone is because you want the company. You can save money and feed only yourself if you're basically going to be there by yourself anyway. It's ridiculous.

I watched a couple one night go through their whole meal without a word to each other, but both were tapping away on the cell phones. I imagine it was a date as they were fairly young. What a good way to get to know each other...