All rise the honorable magistrate -name redacted- presiding.
The defendant is accused of sorcery in the 1st degree, in vandalism of the handiwork of a master craftsman in the 1st degree, and in 7,000 counts of
kidnapping of a lesser sentient organism in the 1st degree. Our records indicate that your father was a Lutheran, is that correct.
--Yes your honor.
Fine, then in procedure with the principle law of universes, Iesus Christos will act as your attorney in these matters. How do you plead?
--Actually your honor, I would like to fire my attorney. It is in my understanding that he has a close relationship with the author of my universe and
that he got his position largely through nepotism. He should recuse himself from these proceedings.
As is your right, so ordered.
How do you plead?
--Your honor, I will pay whatever debt I owe to this court and whatever restitution I owe to the author of my universe, assuming that I owe such
restitution; however, I would like to show that this author engaged in fraud in getting me to enter this place and that the ego he placed me with to
usher me along my journey did in fact entrap me into committing these acts while I was there.
--After several long sequences of mock death and rebirth, after long centuries of confusing imagery, after many sessions of hypnosis and illusion,
after being drugged with amnesia cocktails, seduced, lied to, and tortured endlessly, the author of this scenario did thoroughly confuse me about the
nature of my being, and it is, in fact, my proclamation that he has committed slavery in the 1st degree and should owe to me seven thousand lifetimes
of lost wages as recorded by the events in his multi-verse.
How do you plead? I won't ask you again.
--Not guilty.
The court calls its first witness. The ego you were born with...
To be concluded.
edit on 11 27 2014 by Nechash because: (no reason given)