I told you. It's only harassment if she's not into you

Remember the video that started it all? Following up on my previous thread
100 cat calls in NYC

I present my main argument, it's only harassment if she's not into the guy hitting on her. (kind of) Well, try explaining this!


Hmmm that fine line between harassment and um Don Juan ladies man just got a little more blurred.

And to think, all these years I've been doing it the hard way. Time to find me a wing woman.

As much as I hate to admit it, it's true. Two men can say exactly the same thing and one response may be, "Ugh that creeper over there won't leave me alone." Or, "Omg. That super hot guy just talked to me!"
Sad.

I'd like to see a guy try that routine on other guys. It probably wouldn't take long before he got punched in the face.

a reply to: FlySolo

Well, try explaining this!

Alright then... I'll spell out the obvious for you.

- Women do not feel threatened by other women in regards to size, stature, strength.
- A women is able to easily defend herself against another woman if the approacher turns out to be a nutcase.
- Women do not have a history of raping each other.
- Women feel a connection/kinship with other women, therefore they're more easily receptive to one another.

Your welcome.

a reply to: FlySolo

Okay, let me help you out here:

Men randomly shouting compliments out to women on the streets is sexual in nature; men randomly being friendly in an area where it is not normal is generally hitting on a woman. This is the way that normal human beings interact, and this is the way that normal human beings take these things because this is the way things are most of the time. Humans do not function on the "well, this may be the exception"; we function on the norms and generalities.

A woman doing it is completely different. Firstly, women notice one another's clothing/looks all the time, and women are generally more friendly and talkative towards one another. Socially, even if it would be taken as a hit on from a guy, we just assume that the woman is awkward or maybe trying to be goofy with us unless she kept it up for a while.

Furthermore, let me be blunt here: if you're randomly shouting compliments at people or being unnaturally friendly, you've already shown yourself to be a bit aggressive and to have a functioning that is slightly outside the social norm. Now, when you do this, you normally throw people off and make them a bit uneasy; when you add to the fact that there is somebody twice my size doing this, it can be extremely intimidating, especially if they keep at it.

I find it's easier to just ignore women. It's what they usually do to me!

a reply to: CranialSponge

And a woman is more likely to consider lesbianism over a man on the street.

eta: no pressure guys.

originally posted by: corvuscorrax
I find it's easier to just ignore women.

I have found that to be an effective way of picking them up.
Not necessarily ignoring them, just pretending to be not interested in getting them in bed.
Let them make the first move and then make polite conversation while maintaining a pleasant air of aloofness.
It's a lot like fishing. There is an art to knowing when to jiggle the bait without scaring away the catch.

Not really sure the question here... can you extrapolate a little?
Are you comparing the response from a girl getting hit on by a girl vs. a guy?
Most girls are taught from a young age to avoid guys who are direct without getting to know them.
Most girls are also more confident around strange girls vs. guys; speaking, being naked etc...
This girl is hot and she is a cold calling pro. She has that advantage and doesn't have the..is this guy a creep filtering process.
In my experience girls like the confident and assertive guys who look at them as equals and don't do the cat call behavior. This behavior is funny after a relationship is made, but has virtually zero real world results.
My Gf is confident and thinks other women are hot and will do a 3some, but it is more for my pleasure, not hers, I got lucky. She has no interest in a romantic relationship of the opposite sex. I share the same opinion with her that women are just more physically attractive than men. Guys have have a larger group of weirdos to sort through as well. Interesting post

a reply to: FlySolo

Less to do with lesbianism and more to do with female connection/kinship. And yes, women are more open to homosexuality than men are, but you're missing the key factor as to why these women were not shunning away from each other as easily:

Women are not physically intimidated by other women, thus they do not see the approacher as a potential threat.


It's not rocket science, my friend. It really isn't.

originally posted by: skunkape23

originally posted by: corvuscorrax
I find it's easier to just ignore women.

I have found that to be an effective way of picking them up.
Not necessarily ignoring them, just pretending to be not interested in getting them in bed.
Let them make the first move and then make polite conversation while maintaining a pleasant air of aloofness.
It's a lot like fishing. There is an art to knowing when to jiggle the bait without scaring away the catch.

Oh I've had some women definitely express interest and they only get more aggressive in their advances the less interested I seem I'm just not in any position for a serious relationship, or one that's into casual ones for that matter.

It's fine by me though I quite enjoy my stress-free life. Err perhaps lower than average stress who can say they have none?

a reply to: CranialSponge

heh, no need to tell me about it. There's reasons why techniques have been developed to circumvent the natural defenses. Like never approach head on, always at a 45 degree angle. The three-second rule, social proof, talking to the whole group, ignoring the "target" and many more. Because women have such immediate auto response defenses, men have to be subtle when trying gain her attention. It has to be done without her knowing.

a reply to: FlySolo

In the wild kingdom, the smaller animal is automatically leery and cautious of the larger animal approaching its personal space (aka survival instinct). That personal space can range anywhere from 2 ft to 10 ft and up, depending on the environmental circumstances.

Why would anyone think it would be any different in the human kingdom ?

It's not a game, it's not a laughing matter, nor is it something to be sneered at.
It's a simple, basic fact of life.



"Never judge a (wo)man until you've walked a mile in his(her) moccasins." ~ Native proverb

Good words to live by.

originally posted by: CranialSponge
a reply to: FlySolo

Well, try explaining this!

Alright then... I'll spell out the obvious for you.

- Women do not feel threatened by other women in regards to size, stature, strength.
- A women is able to easily defend herself against another woman if the approacher turns out to be a nutcase.
- Women do not have a history of raping each other.
- Women feel a connection/kinship with other women, therefore they're more easily receptive to one another.

Your welcome.

So should I just not talk to other women because they might be afraid of me raping them or beating them up or something? Are all women afraid of men? I just never realized all ladies were scared of men like that, I feel horrible that I frightened all those poor women by trying (and often succeeding) to have a polite and friendly conversation to try to get to know them and form a connection that may one day lead to a loving, mutually beneficial relationship.

So how do I get girls then, if I can't talk to them?

a reply to: CagliostroTheGreat

False dichotomy.

You're presenting a one or the other scenario, without any possible middle ground resolutions.

And since you've only given me two choices to pick from (talk to or don't talk to), I can't answer your question logically.

a reply to: CranialSponge

What I gathered from your post that I quoted was that if I approach a woman and attempt to initiate a conversation she will likely be frightened by my mere presence, so, I guess what I am asking is: how would I go about talking to a woman without frightening her? Because according to you, all women quake at the mere presence of a man. I understand that women likely find it easier to bond with other women, not really a surprise but I don't want to scare girls when I talk to them! Is it a faux pas to talk to women in public? I don't agree with the behaviour of the guys in the "cat call" video, I'm nothing like that, is it only guys like that that scare women, or all of us? I'm just trying to understand so I don't scare anymore poor women by trying to get to know them. I feel awful if that is the case.

Honestly I just find your assertion that women are inherently afraid of men to be quite demeaning. But that's just my opinion as a big scary man.

a reply to: CagliostroTheGreat

What I gathered from your post that I quoted was that if I approach a woman and attempt to initiate a conversation she will likely be frightened by my mere presence, so, I guess what I am asking is: how would I go about talking to a woman without frightening her? Because according to you, all women quake at the mere presence of a man. I understand that women likely find it easier to bond with other women, not really a surprise but I don't want to scare girls when I talk to them! Is it a faux pas to talk to women in public? I don't agree with the behaviour of the guys in the "cat call" video, I'm nothing like that, is it only guys like that that scare women, or all of us? I'm just trying to understand so I don't scare anymore poor women by trying to get to know them. I feel awful if that is the case.

Honestly I just find your assertion that women are inherently afraid of men to be quite demeaning. But that's just my opinion as a big scary man.

My bolding.

All of these are your words, not mine.

My words were "cautious" and "leery".

Big difference.

So I'm sorry, but I can't relate to what you're talking about.

originally posted by: corvuscorrax
I find it's easier to just ignore women. It's what they usually do to me!

Haha. they get me all madly in love, before they ignore me, when it then becomes the hardest thing to do, to let go.

your plan sounds much less work !!

originally posted by: CagliostroTheGreat
a reply to: CranialSponge

What I gathered from your post that I quoted was that if I approach a woman and attempt to initiate a conversation she will likely be frightened by my mere presence, so, I guess what I am asking is: how would I go about talking to a woman without frightening her? Because according to you, all women quake at the mere presence of a man. I understand that women likely find it easier to bond with other women, not really a surprise but I don't want to scare girls when I talk to them! Is it a faux pas to talk to women in public? I don't agree with the behaviour of the guys in the "cat call" video, I'm nothing like that, is it only guys like that that scare women, or all of us? I'm just trying to understand so I don't scare anymore poor women by trying to get to know them. I feel awful if that is the case.

Honestly I just find your assertion that women are inherently afraid of men to be quite demeaning. But that's just my opinion as a big scary man.

Mate leave it, without being sexist - the poster you are conversing with is deliberately winding you up. Anyone can see what you are getting at. Lots of women do this. It's a power trip thing. They need power over men as they have been suppressed for so long

a reply to: and14263

CranialSponge is the one persistently explaining the situation. And the posts concerning either or and extreme, was one you could answer. Women naturally are cautious around strange men, frightened is too strong a word, unless they have experienced damage in the past, or unless the man is giving off some bad mojo, but cautious nontheless. In groups where everyone knows someone and the person is vetted, it may be less, but some women are always cautious. So it has to do with the nature of the greetings and interactions and the location, how safe it is. Of course men and women meet up and get together overall, but in positive safe environments overall, or if its an emergency, the person demonstrates hero mode, higher mind abilities.

Most women are not addicted to power, that is not their thing, hardrive or softdrive. They're literally wired to be communicative, collective, caretake others, whether or not they're living in a society that has bent them out of shape, ie US materialistic, anti family society or not.