Breaking news: Man found dead, face down in bowl of Muesli...

I do not have a direct link but early reports show he was apparently pulled under by a strong current...

I would have thought somebody would have bitten, even a negative?

I have lots more...

I don't find this story very amuesling.

I have to disagree, this is as good as it gets.



a reply to: weirdguy

This jokes final resting place…

Face plant

a reply to: nonspecific

BREAKING! ATSER hides homosexual stalking behavior in veiled inside comment.

ATS Headquarters - ATS user "nonspecific" has put before the ATS community a NEW veiled comment, announcing that some person who eats Muelsi will be found dead in it. The obviously veiled comment only had relevance to a couple of people who got "the inside joke", but the vast majority, sickened by his homosexual stalking of this unknown Muelsi eating ATSer, were disgusted by it.

"Why does he think this community wants to hear his veiled comments?" Asked one ATSer. "If he can't say it without veiled references, why does he say them at all?"

The fact that inside jokes on a community like ATS could easily be spread through private message without having to place them before the general community to wonder about what they about seemed to underlie the general disgust.

"Is he trying to spread the message that 'he knows something the rest of us don't know'? " asked another ATSer.

Homosexual stalking is widely speculated to be behind nonspecific's veiled comments, but what lies behind "nonspecifics" veiled comments is widely unknown, just as he likes it.

An act of a cereal killer. . . . . . .

originally posted by: nonspecific
I would have thought somebody would have bitten, even a negative?

I have lots more...

Do us a favor and save them or we'll alert the Bad Joke Moderator.

a reply to: beezzer

BREAKING NEWS - Beezer went all in on the "cereal killer" narrative, but other ATSer's saw deeper:

"Why this particular joke - right now?" Asked one ATSer. "Doesn't that seem a little odd?"

Others speculated that there may be more behind it. One ATSer said:

"Does anyone actually know where the word 'conspiracy' comes from? It means to 'breath together'. " The fact that the word had references to ancient yogic and tantric practices that were intended to unify people didn't seem to be lost on other members:

"Could the conspiracy we fear, actually reference a deep connection that we all share? Is it possible the conspiracy can only be overcome through the greater 'conspiracy'?" One ATSer called Tridentblue, (widely regarded as insane) asked.

Regardless, the important questions are being asked, and what REALLY lies behind nonspecifics post remains to be seen...

I think it's funny as hell, but I've had a few beers

S&F

a reply to: tridentblue

False flag joke spawned by the Rothschilds?

If you string the letters together using the existing letters in the thread you can spell "thermite"

What?

a reply to: canucks555

BREAKING NEWS - ATS shill canucks555 tried further to bury the homosexual stalking veiled reference by conflating its size, comparing it to a Rothschild level conspiracy.

"Our hope is that by making the claims ridiculously large, related to a major global banking family, we can distract attention from the claims at hand" One ATS shill, known to support canucks555, and homosexual stalking in general, was heard saying.

But other ATS members remained skeptical:

"Why the ocean undercurrent references, if it was just a 'cereal killer' joke?" One member asked. And still, other voices heard from a different section of ATS, those known to discuss philosophy of mind and soul asked another question entirely:

"Sure, what if 'nonspecific' is a shill tied in with the conspiracy, what if canucks555 is a shill tied into the conspiracy - but even further still, and deeper still what if we are all shills tied in to the conspiracy? What if this breathing together that defines the union of all of us grants power to all of us to shape each other, to have the rhythms of our lives effect all lives? What if we are all connected? What if the power we delegate to the "Illuminati" is something we all have if we have the courage to accept through being our real selves?"

These comments were dismissed as nonsense by other users, like TridentBlue:

"Hogwash" he said. "Canucks555 is CLEARLY out to get me. Geeze, just look at her/his avatar.

And the debate rages on here on ATS...

originally posted by: nonspecific
I do not have a direct link but early reports show he was apparently pulled under by a strong current...

Shirley you can't be serious?

A yes the Avatar.

Actually an earthquake, or lack thereof, is responsible for the anime.

-But that's another conspiracy! Tell us more!

No....

Coming from you Beez I would have expected better with this currant issue?

Your attempt at humour was a bit corny (flake)... Yep... Crap too I know!

Kindest respects

Rod

a reply to: nonspecific

big brother is watching

The plot it appears thickens.

It turns out the police are treating the death as suspicious, apparently the man had a police record.

He was caught with a large ammount of illigal fireworks earlier in the year.

He was aressted but due to lack of evidence the police decided to let him off.