MY CRAZY LIFE STORY/DREAM

Dear ATSers,

A few months ago I had my only paranormal experience of my life. Let me tell about what was going on in my life, in hopes of you all better understanding my experience. I played college basketball in california up until a few years ago. Injuries along with me smoking a lot of pot while injured ultimately lead to me quitting the team, which was one of the worst decisions in my life. Fast forward a year...I move to a new college town and did well in school but the regret from not living out my dream of playing basketball in college was still with me. This caused me to dabble in heavier drugs while still smoking enough pot to kill a grizzly. I end going to jail for a day for pushing my ex down onto a bed(never have i been abusive before, however drugs will change u). This causes me to have to quit school(court fees + college expenses=too much) and move home with my dad to take court appointed 52 weeks of anger management. Once home, I began isolating myself and tried meth with a woman who lived in the back of my dads house(actually this was the worst decision of my life). I actually used meth everyday for about a year . Listened to a lot of sad music, blamed everyone but myself for my problems, didnt work, didnt socialize, etc. About 8 months ago is when I decided to fight this self depression/addiction to meth and weed, by visiting my uncle and aunt in San Diego. This is where my experience occurred. The third night I was there, I was listening to c2c and I began to fall asleep. Immediately, I remember viewing my body from above it, and seeing the actual setting of my aunt/uncles house from this perspective(so weird to me). Then, what I call an "entity", for lack of a better term, descended on my body. Now, this entity i have found hard to completely describe, it was blacker than black, had appendage like structures that spread over me and laid on me. I could not breathe, I could not move, I could not make a sound but in my head I could hear myself screaming. I tried to run to my aunts room, however I went there(from my above my body perspective), but my body stayed still. Then, I remembered yelling(in my head) god please help me and I instantly woke up sweating like OJ Simpson in a court room. This was about 8 months ago, after this occured I went back to my dad's and sadly started using drugs again. But, with the help of A LOT of research on conscious, why we are here on earth, love, the soul or spirit, prayer and meditation, I sit before you today a clean and sober man for the first time since I was 18 years old. Granted, I have only been clean for 6 weeks but I know that I will never go back. Too much pain. This whole experience has been a CRAZY lesson of finding god, but now I know I have the tools to be successful in this world. So, I will leave you with this: If any of you are out there trying to overcome something, dont be afraid to ask for help! Dont be afraid to be wrong or give up control! Last, if anyone with knowledge on specific spirits could help me figure out if I am going to have to deal with this entity later on in life or what, it would be greatly appreciated!

Love you all,
Kevin

a reply to: kevinp2300

Last, if anyone with knowledge on specific spirits could help me figure out if I am going to have to deal with this entity later on in life or what, it would be greatly appreciated!

The bad thing about drug abuse for addictive type people is that they will eventually hit bottom. The good thing about hitting bottom is theres no place to go from there but up.

Now that you have seen this and the spirit behind it all, you can hopefully be convinced to allow change, always being aware now that this thing is waiting nearby in the wings and will tempt you in the future to return to it. You may even give in, then quit many times before getting some distance. Life is an ongoing process.

Don't feel singled out, most everyone who goes down this road has a similar tale to yours on the other side. I do.

Once clean and down the road a while you will discover the events which led you to begin taking drugs in the first place. Keep from running to the comfort provided by the dope and you may even resolve them.

Carry on.

a reply to: intrptr

Thank you for taking the time to read/respond. You definitely hit the nail on the head. I like to say I'm not on the road to success but on success road. The feeling of knowing I have made it this far is amazing though. Taking anger management classes has allowed me to see what lead me up to my anger, which in turn lead to drug use. I just hope someone reads this, who needs help, and maybe it plants a seed in their head. As the wise yoda once said, "fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering.

a reply to: kevinp2300

I like to say I'm not on the road to success but on success road.

Thats an interesting way of putting it. You might take heart with this I learned somewhere… for what its worth.

People who are successful in the world are wrapped up in it and misled to believe they are the best they can be. This is not always the case. Successful politicians, military and business individuals are the ones responsible for the plight the world is in. But they will never see anything wrong with what they are doing because everyone lauds them. At least addicts know they are on the wrong path and try to become open to change once they have suffered enough.

Kind of a blessing in disguise?

Who would you rather be, a successful warmonger, banker or politician or a humble reformed character? So believe me when i tell you that you have been led down the errant path that leads to the correct one.

As long as we keep getting up after falling down we will ultimately "succeed".

Without going too deep of the deep end thats why I believe Jesus was right when he hung out with and taught the down trodden and oppressed people, poor in the world and in spirit.

You'll be fine. You are being shown the spiritual side of things in connection with your plight for very specific reasons.

These lessons are valuable.

By the way, no one is perfect and I still struggle with my own demons. Thanks for letting me share.

a reply to: kevinp2300

Good luck in your race! From one former athlete to another. Stay strong and never let it get you down.

a reply to: intrptr

Ya, whats crazy is I actually asked god/the universe for help and it answered. As long as you stay true to your conscious, the ball keeps rolling. Now its time for me to figure out why I am here on this earth(self actualization). That is a good point about success as well. It is relative to the individual. Whats sad is ppl live their lives chasing "success" and their soul is left unfulfilled. It really was a blessing in disguise. You ever thought about timelines? and how doing drugs/making decisions affects your potential timelines. I guess that would be delving into the past and wondering "what if" rather than what is. I find more satisfaction in conversations and helping ppl than I do making $. Maybe that ties into my self actualization. Good stuff, learned a lot from you today. Hope my experience reminds u of the joy in overcoming hardships. It truly is better than any high from a drug one can get.


a reply to: ketsuko

Good luck in your race! From one former athlete to another. Stay strong and never let it get you down.


Appreciate it man, what sport did you play?