Coaping with City-People and City-Culture

Well before i begin i would just like to say that my intent here is NOT to cause any offense or start a Rural-person vs City-person fight.

just looking for some advice.

So here are some of the problems that i face.

Thanks to our great economy I had to leave the ranching business and take up a new job in a city its depressing enough to go from working all day outside in the wide open pasture full of grass, and horses to working all day inside with a cubical full of papers, and computers.

Problem 1: Extremely long and expensive commute to work ( 2 hours 1 way)

However i am stubborn and refuse to move to leave my home and my land would be a shame (many generations of family on this land) also I really enjoy the privacy and peace and quiet out here, my closest neighbor is 2 miles away and i can do anything i want on my property. Shoot all the guns i want, throw loud all night beer and bonfire fests whenever, hell i can even piss out my front door if i want.

Problem 2: Culture Shock.

This environment is completely Alien to me, The people i work with barely have meaningful conversations they are obsessed with the phone, and my work related questions are often met with quick 1 liners.

I really do not have any thing in common with my co-workers, also I have learned not to talk about hunting or shooting because its "Barbaric and Offensive to some people" yeah my manager said that to me. Ok how bout making some shine with the boys "Please do not discuss Illegal Alcohol production and distribution here" Ok Mr. manager! . Everyone is really up-tight, rude, preoccupied and really really hyper some of these guys talk so damn fast i don't even know what they are saying.


Why don't i just work somewhere closer? our local economy up here is terrible. and i have a family to feed this job was the closest financially that i can find, that was close to what i used to make. I will not work minimum wage that's all my town has to offer.

has any one else even been in this situation before and how did you cope?

Closing thoughts

lesson learned during the first week of employment. Never accidentally wear your #-kickers into the office, the city-people could smell me a mile away some were gagging, whoops sorry folks after many years of dealing with manure i cant smell it anymore.

I hope no one is offended by this that is not my goal.
god help me

reply to post by Craninalbliss

just looking for some advice.

Remember why you are doing this. Remember why you are driving back and forth for two hours. Remember why you refuse to sell out.

You are living in a free world (pissing out your front door, lol) and commuting back and forth to the land of OZ. One day, when the big fan gets all clogged with manure, those city dwellers will have no place to go. You will simply stay home.

The real you and the real place is your boonies. Continue to play your cards close to your chest.

Carry on…

Hey I was raised in the country and live in a city, here is me at work:

Have superficial conversations.
Pretend interest in what they think is important.
Do not express a strong opinion or view on anything.
Be polite (hold doors, etc...)
Do not go out with coworkers for drinks or dates.
Do not talk about personal stuff at work or with coworkers.

This seems to work for me (same job ~7 years now), I make my friends outside of work anyway....

I was raised in the city and hell even i don't like the city. It's filled with ego tripping people thinking the world revolves around them. But then again the people who live outside the cities here are (not so bright) so i'm stuck between a-holes and s-holes
lucky me

Country boy redneck here. I work in a small city, and get to maintain my country life.

Dude, put in your time. You aren't crazy, they are. Just put in your time, and make it through. But remember: when the world goes to hell, its us country folk who will make it. Not only can we open a can, we can also dress fresh game.

When I go to work I go to work to make money not to make friends I have enough of those mostly because I could care less to hang with these people after work . Don't get me wrong I joke around and make some brain dead small talk try to have a little fun ... makes the day go by a lil faster so I can home home to my family where I would rather be .

Just do what you have to do , keep work life separate and home life separate hopefully sooner or later you can find a city folk u can relate to a little bit at work and maybe not feel so alienated at work .

I am a hard working ...hole and I am ok with that because I am not one to fall into work place drama and keep my distance .

Like others have suggested, stay focused on your purpose. I'm sure your family is grateful for your sacrifice and misses those hours with you that you now spend commuting. Although I've lived in a city for about 15 years, I can't honestly say I've found many social connections in this atmosphere because my value system doesn't seem to sync up with the majority of my city's citizens. I was brought here out of need for a job and lack of a car, and I just waited and hoped for it to one day "feel like home". I'm now ready to sell my house as I realize I'm the square peg and this city is as round of a hole as there is. That said...

You will find your time spent in the city much easier if you can find a sense of humor about people and also keep an open mind so that you might notice one or two people who come from backgrounds similar to yours or have value systems that echo your own. There are people in cities who would prefer the country, but for reasons beyond their immediate control find themselves displaced like you, often for the same economic reasons you find yourself in a city. And if nothing else, cities are cauldrons of foods from around the world. Try some pad thai, or grab some tandoori chicken. It won't make the city feel like home, but you'll find new things to appreciate about your predicament.

And be grateful. There are many families that would give anything to drive into a city every day to support their families. You've been given a second chance in whatever city you're in, so grab something exotic from a food truck and start planning how you're going to return to your hometown to work. You may even find a way to create jobs for others beside yourself. Good luck!

reply to post by Craninalbliss


Hate to say it, but city life is definitely less comfortable - I came from a town where everyone on the street knew each other, and there was very little in town (no traffic lights).

When I moved out to my current location, the culture shock was almost intriguing in a way - People out here are wary of everyone that is around them. Work is just that: Work. There is some idle chatter, but it's mostly a "Get in at 9, work until 5, and get out" type of place.

Here's a couple things I learned the hard way:
1. People will get offended very quickly, even if it's a life experience. For example, I mentioned something about how dangerous the outskirts of Detroit are, and how people literally cross in the road regardless of the oncoming traffic...Well, I got pulled aside, because one person had a relative that almost got hit doing that (If you aren't using a crosswalk, and decide to play Frogger on a 4 lane street...You get where my conversation was going).

2. No-one is your friend at work - Sure, there are some nice people, and most will almost be some sort of "friend". But the second it comes to layoffs, or the thought of you getting a promotion over them, that's when the mask will come off.

3. For the long commutes, bring an audiobook - In my case, I have about a 1 1/2 hour commute coming home - I'm considering starting to learn German, as otherwise I'll be going into daydreaming mode.

4. Focus on the job - yes, it is nice talking and taking your leisure to get the job done, but in corporate terms, that would be "unproductive". They want you to be the most efficient person in the company, because it helps them maintain their own workload.

5. At work, get out and exercise for about 10 minutes a day. This could be anything from walking out to get lunch, running up and down the stairs (if you work in a multi-level building), or walking to the farthest bathroom in your building. Not only will this help to relieve stress, but it will make you feel a little more alert.

Hope some of this helps, and if not, then listen to someone else.
-fossilera

Grow marijuana on your land, problem solved