Today, I was elected president.

I am the president, according to today's election.

So, I went to American National Government class. We were doing a little demonstration of how the government works, election wise, and passing a bill, that sort of thing.

And so, two or three people threw their names into the ring.

They had neither the charisma nor the pure voter draw that I managed to achieve, and so I won by a wide margin.

But the joke was on me. After deciding who the Vice President would be, I found out soon that in this mock demonstration of how the government works to pass legislature, that I had little power to influence how mock-congress drafted up legislature.

I had ideas, things I wanted to effect changes on. Guaranteed medical coverage if a man is attacked by an alligator. Guaranteed denial of coverage if a man's injury is caused by his own stupidity. Government mandated and regulated corruption, as opposed to the rampant and unregulated corruption that rules the modern era.

Why, I had half-convinced myself that I was president in actuality. But I could not influence the mock-house of representatives and the mock-house of senate that were drafting up the legislature for the bill.

And so I sat there, and considered a peacekeeping operation upon the bordering room, in order to stabilize it's inhabitants. It would have effectively doubled the land of my administration of American National Government class. But there was no convincing the professor. I suppose she fulfilled the role of shadow government.

Eventually though, the mock-house of congress and the mock-senate managed to agree on a piece of legislature, and I had to give my approval. Unfortunately, I did not have line-item veto, and so, I could not shoot down a portion of the legislature which sought to increase the privatization of health care. My original intentions of a health care system that was streamlined for alligator caused injuries was watered down, and adapted into broader language that covered most life threatening injuries.

Grudgingly, I signed the piece of mock-legislature. I was told by a couple of them that they wished I was actually president.
What sort of person would wish that? Then again, I had the person who I appointed Vice President joke that he would assassinate me so he could become president. Now I know how Kennedy felt.

Today, I can say I was elected President, and be telling the truth, though. And that's something.

Well congrats. No doubt it will give you lots to reflect on in the coming years. It looks like you figured out the charisma part but didn't quite get the hang of the influence part yet, as there are many layers to that. On a lighter note, what acronym do you think your opponents would apply to you as president of a mock government, P-OMG?

reply to post by Grifter42


You mean they didn't give you a pen and phone and a monstrous, Orwellian bureaucracy so you could just do what you wanted whatever they were doing?

Oh, and why didn't you veto their bill if it didn't meet with your approval? Then they could have tested the mechanism to override vetos.

ketsuko
reply to post by Grifter42

 

Why didn't you veto their bill if it didn't meet with your approval? Then they could have tested the mechanism to override vetos.

During a man's career in mock-politics, he occasionally has to make compromises. Some for the sake of the people, others for the sake of time, and functionality. This was a compromise, yes, but not of my core values. There was little time left in class to do much other than veto it, or sign it. And so I signed it. I considered each point, but without line item veto, it was an all or nothing deal. They applauded me for signing it, someone wished I was actually president. But I realized that I had failed them. I signed a piece of legislature that did not fully represent the mock-public I was elected to be Chief Executive of. And they thanked me for it. Mock-politics are twisted.

You should have declared a Class Emergency and invaded the next classroom. Hire the football team to extort money from the other students. Have the computer department monitor everyone's email and Facebook accounts to locate possible troublemakers. Declare the professor an Enemy of the Class and have him indefinately detained in study hall. Have the wrestling team take over the school newspaper and tell everyone that everything is fine.

Don't you know anything about running a democracy?

VictorVonDoom
You should have declared a Class Emergency and invaded the next classroom. Hire the football team to extort money from the other students. Have the computer department monitor everyone's email and Facebook accounts to locate possible troublemakers. Declare the professor an Enemy of the Class and have him indefinately detained in study hall. Have the wrestling team take over the school newspaper and tell everyone that everything is fine.

Don't you know anything about running a democracy?

You make many a good suggestion. How'd you like a cabinet position? One that is not in line to succeed the presidency should anything happen to me, of course.

I'm already dealing with troubles on the homefront. My vice president was opening joking about assassinating me. Eternal President of Am-Nat-Gov class should not stand for this. I can't deal with troubles in the homeland and plan an invasion of the border-rooms in order to acquire more rooms. I find no rule in the student handbook that says that not to annex other class rooms in peacekeeping operations.

One day, they'll all worship a shiny statue of me, and say to each other, "Why, that is Eternal President Grifter. He died of exhaustion bringing us all towards the great leap forward." And I'll be watching from afar, having faked my death to become an immortal idea.

It's the perfect plan. If only it didn't sound so absolutely insane, it would be even better.

reply to post by Grifter42


How about Supreme Court Justice? We'll fabricate a scandal and have your VP impeached. I'll certify that everything you do is constitutional.

VictorVonDoom
reply to post by Grifter42

 

How about Supreme Court Justice? We'll fabricate a scandal and have your VP impeached. I'll certify that everything you do is constitutional.

Sounds like a plan.

But things have changed.

Today, they tried to impeach me. They hurled accusations and attacks at your humble narrator and president, accusing him of everything from corruption, to murder, bribery, and solicitation of women of ill repute. Why, one person even said I threw a potato at a child in malice. Why, it was all slander.

And so, by the end of it, I responded to their allegations, explaining the circumstances behind each of the so called "grounds" for impeachment. I did not declare war without consulting congress. That was a peacekeeping operation, not a war. I did not throw a potato at a child. All of their character assassination, I was innocent of. And I spoke confidently, and gave my case.

The vote to impeach me failed. Less than half of the mock-congress voted guilty, in regards to the mock-charges I had been given. Among them, I counted my vice president, voting against my innocence. The military veterans in the class voted not to impeach me. The common folks had voted not to impeach me. Only the folks with something to gain from it voted to impeach.

But for now... I remain the president.

reply to post by Grifter42


You should get the ROTC behind you and declare martial law before it's too late. Also, it sounds like you have too many intelligent students. Divert more funds from teacher's salaries to crush their morale and have the chemistry department put more floride in the water. And it wouldn't hurt to drum up some cheerleader scandal to divert people's attention.