Accidents happen, why should I be punished? Is it OK to push for abortion?

Ok I gone and done it now,

Im half the reason why a new life is gonna be on this planet in about 6 months

The mother is a neighbour who took advantage of my drunken state on 3 occasions (OK probably not but thats kinda how I feel right now), the 2nd occasion the condom broke, my main concern was disease but thankfully we were both clear.

2 weeks ago I get a call from the girl telling me shes pregnant!!!!!!
My 1st thought was too say "damn that sucks, are you and the father serious?" then it hit me why she was telling me, Its mine!!!!!!!

I want a wife and kids for sure but I want them at the same time, there is no future for me and this girl, to be honest even shagging her was a mistake and now she is potentially gonna be in my life to 1 degree or another forever!!!!!

We spoke today and she is planning on keeping it, obviously thats not what I want.
After trying to reason with her she cut me off and said "this is my decision not yours"
I told her that since it was going to have a major impact on my life I should have a say and at least be heard out, she politely listened to what I had to say then basically told me to shove it and she was having it.
I wasnt happy but didnt scream or yell, I just left.

On the 2 minute walk home it hit me, How Fukn dare she or any woman say its not my decision!!!!!!
50+ years ago when there werent options OK you had to man up and marry whatever uggo you knocked up but nowadays its not the same, its no longer some dodgy bugger in an alleyway with a coathanger its a legal and professional procedure, the moral implications are non existant as far as Im concerned as I consider babies parasites till their born (Im sure this will change when Im having a child I want) and for me it just comes down to practicalities, mentally, emotionally and financially neither of us alone or even together is ready for this.
When I asked for 1 positive reason for having the baby she didnt have one, not one yet she is still keeping it!!!!

I called her when I got home and was really freaking out so was a bit nasty, I told her she could barely look after a cat so how was she gonna look after a baby, I told her she would been seen by her community as a slut, I asked her how the kid was gonna feel when one day he asks who its dad is and he comes to visit me and my wife and children, I asked what was gonna happen to her social life, I asked how she was gonna manage work and being a single mum etc etc
I basically told her if its not my decision then its not my responsibility, if she wants to have it go for it but consider me an anonymous sperm donor and not a father, I told her I would not be contributing in anyway shape or form to the child and would bankrupt myself before she got anything.

Did I mean it? at the time yes, now? still 90% yes.

I was responsible ie used protection and this girl was a drunken booty call, if it was a long term or even short term GF I would embrace the situation but like this, HELLS FREAKIN NO!!!!!!!

A female friend gave me some advice to just stress her out, if I keep on her about how irresponsible it is maybe she will see reason and have the procedure or if not maybe I can stress her out so much that she miscarries? Not sure Ill aim for that but I wont lie and say Id be upset if I got that news.
Until we hit the 12 week cut off date in about 3 weeks I am gonna keep at her to have the procedure, I genuinely believe Im doing her a favour.

So Im curious to see what people on here think, Ive told several friends about this and all except a cluckky lesbian are on my side,
am I standing up for myself and every man who was told it "wasnt his decision" and then had to suffer the lifetime of consequences for a decision that wasnt his or am I just another potential deadbeat dad trying to justify skipping out on a life he created?

reply to post by IkNOwSTuff

Ok I gone and done it now,

Im half the reason why a new life is gonna be on this planet in about 6 months

Hmmmmm, you admit your responsibility in your first sentence, then you go onto push the blame on the woman you chose to sleep with????

Really? I guess you learned a valuable lesson. Never let your little head think for your big head?

What is sad, is that your instinct to rut with a female has resulted into bringing a child into this screwed up world!!

Bet you can feel the shrinkage for your actions now, can't you?

Be a man and take care of the fruit of your loin! If she isn't good enough to bare your children then keep your willy in your pants!

reply to post by IkNOwSTuff


You have to own up to it. I'd get a DNA test regardless, but still, if it's yours you are going to have to deal with that.

Been there, done that. Explained to her everything you did, town slut, irresponsible, unable to take care of a cat, probably in the same manner. lol Everything changed for me when I saw my kids face the first time.

Proud father of 5 years, the mother is barely even around anymore. She couldn't handle having a child, go figure.

Good luck to you.

Peace.

reply to post by IkNOwSTuff


Oops accidents happen for sure. If the lady in question has the child you are responsible for the child bankrupt or not. They will seek payment long after the child is 18. Legally you are off the hook at 18 but if you are behind in support payments they will continue to try and find you and collect after that date.

reply to post by seeker1963


I admit my part in the accident that happened but its an accident that is easily fixable if she is so inclined.

There are safe and reasonable methods of fixing these accidents that are readily available, I have offered to pay for this.

I admit the accident was 50% my fault but the choice to compound the accident with another one is entirely on her, if she wants to ruin her life thats her decision not mine

Woe is me woe is me.

Listen to yourself.
Your gonna try and stress her out so she miscarries.
What a sick bastard you are.
Why don't you just punch her in the stomach.
Push her down the stairs.

You act like it's all her fault.
It takes two to make a baby, jackwagon.

Does your vag hurt?
Can't afford it?
Too bad, put your work boots on and get to work.

What a loser you are.

reply to post by IkNOwSTuff

I admit my part in the accident that happened but its an accident that is easily fixable if she is so inclined.

There are safe and reasonable methods of fixing these accidents that are readily available, I have offered to pay for this.

I admit the accident was 50% my fault but the choice to compound the accident with another one is entirely on her, if she wants to ruin her life thats her decision not mine

An ACCIDENT? Where did you go to school?

I am 50 years old and I know damn well that I was in 4th grade when we learned where babies come from!

Face it! This woman owns your ass, because you CHOSE to impregnate her!

But hey! Your the one on ATS showing everyone how cowardly and irresponsible you are.

Your so called "ACCIDENT" and your so called solution for you being irresponsible is to kill your own child???

What a man you are................

reply to post by IkNOwSTuff


DNA test is a must. It may not even be yours.
And if she wants to have it, try to get her to give it up for adoption. That would be the best option for the kid. Doesn't sound like she would know how to be a mother.

1: leave the girl alone its her body and u do have to pay for it
2: ur female friend is a sick cow i died for 5 mins miscarrying twins with my fiancee i got a daughter now and i never regret her
3:dont blame it all on the girl takes 2 to tango

if not maybe I can stress her out so much that she miscarries?

...brought to you from "ATSs more important and intelligent member".

Lucky for us, and your future child, you know stuff, apparently.

But...

Like you, I got "trapped" for my first child. I decided to have other kids with that same woman because I didn't want to have children who would be half to their siblings.

We never got along, but our children are so wonderful. I could never have had them with another, nor would I wish it, however bad it may be between us, now.

I love my kids and I will never regret having them. They are treasures you don't seem to deserve yet.

Kick yourself into a corner and think again...

seeker1963
reply to post by IkNOwSTuff

 

Ok I gone and done it now,

Im half the reason why a new life is gonna be on this planet in about 6 months

Hmmmmm, you admit your responsibility in your first sentence, then you go onto push the blame on the woman you chose to sleep with????

Really? I guess you learned a valuable lesson. Never let your little head think for your big head?

What is sad, is that your instinct to rut with a female has resulted into bringing a child into this screwed up world!!

Bet you can feel the shrinkage for your actions now, can't you?

Be a man and take care of the fruit of your loin! If she isn't good enough to bare your children then keep your willy in your pants!

edit on 20-10-2013 by seeker1963 because: (no reason given)

You said it just as I would have......

sometimes bad things happen you didn't count on, man up and make it right.

reply to post by bjax9er

You act like it's all her fault.
It takes two to make a baby, jackwagon.

As another poster pointed out I took my half of the responsibility for the conception, PROTECTION WAS USED!!!!
The pregnancy is no ones "fault" its an accident plain and simple, choosing to have the child is no accident, Its a plan that I had no part in.

The suggestion to stress her out so she miscarries came from a female and not me, I was just relaying it

If you had been say...bowling.
And you accidentally tripped over the laces on your rented shoes.
And she happened to be in the way...
and a one in a million shot!
Wham
Freak accident!

Right?

It's not like you actually knew that having sex could get a woman pregnant right?
You had no clue.
You thought a baby was something you bought on e-bay....


Why is it that bored people who would never even consider having a baby (and don't even seem to like each other) only seem to have a choice of sex or drunken sex?

Yeah buddy.
You are just the innocent victim.
My sympathies.
Have fun with those child support payments.

Killing your son is not the answer. Hopefully she has found someone to love her and the child. We all know about the birds and the bees, and the honey in the trees.

I dont think you want your beloved next child taken in the same manner do you? Sometimes Karma comes around and kicks you in the rear when you least expect it.

Good Luck.

reply to post by seeker1963

Face it! This woman owns your ass, because you CHOSE to impregnate her!

But hey! Your the one on ATS showing everyone how cowardly and irresponsible you are.

Your so called "ACCIDENT" and your so called solution for you being irresponsible is to kill your own child???

Im curious if when you went to school they also mentioned condoms?
Theyre a relatively recent invention that prevents sperm from getting into the vagina, when you use one of those and it breaks its called an accident.

Until its born I dont consider it a child, for all intents and purposes outside of the maternal/paternal instinct it is a parasite.

Im curious if your religious?
The other kicker to the story is the child is going to be FORCED to be Muslim, it will be on his birth cert, ID, Drivers licence, Passport etc etc and could potentially be jailed or executed if he decides later in life that Jesus is the only path to god.

I should really have included that in the OP to shut the religious nuts up LOL
Not implying your a religious nut by the way

But hey! Your the one on ATS showing everyone how cowardly and irresponsible you are.

I really couldnt care less about what a bunch of anonymous people on a website think about me, 70% hate me for one reason or another already anyway Haha
The friends and family Ive spoken to about this have all been on my side, male and female. The only exception once again was a lesbian I know who is currently being bothered by her biological clock and thinks anything baby related is just awesome.
Do your worst, your words on a screen to me

you are officially a idiot well done boy and people who want u to maker her miscarry/abort it are idiots

miscarriage/abortion mentally scars the woman for life you want your childs blood on your hand

and the ''lesbian' 'isnt saying it coz of her clock but coz she got morals

go to school and learn to be a man u stupied excuse of a human wish people like you wouldnt concieve because theres people out there that want and cant have kids while people like u have casual sex and goe woe with me ive had sex now got a unwanted pregnacy

reply to post by IkNOwSTuff


Do you know what I really find ironic about your whole boo hoo me thread?

The fact that you are seeking validation for killing an unborn child for your own selfish reasons, while I have watched you condemn gun owners in America saying they want guns to kill!

I hope the female that you chose to impregnate with your child, has family that has guns so that your are forced to do the right thing!

How does that hypocrisy feel when someone remembers all of your anti second amendment posts, and yet here you are trying to justify killing an unborn child??

Hmmmmmm, stick that in your pipe and smoke it! I guess you have proven that it just isn't guns that are dangerous and are capable of taking a life????

omg priceless he needs to really check his morals hahahaha


he a confused lil boy

Urgh dbl

IkNOwSTuff
reply to post by seeker1963

 

I admit my part in the accident that happened but its an accident that is easily fixable if she is so inclined.

There are safe and reasonable methods of fixing these accidents that are readily available, I have offered to pay for this.

I admit the accident was 50% my fault but the choice to compound the accident with another one is entirely on her, if she wants to ruin her life thats her decision not mine

Yeah, iknow what it's like. I accidentally got fat. Drunkenly, i ate pizza every night by mistake. I didnt mean to do it, i meant to ride a bike. But accidents happen. Now i want to sue pizza hut. Shoul i ask them to close shop too?I admit it was all an accident. I dont even really like pizza, but it happened.

Pizza is a slut and should be ashamed of itself for not caring about me when it was an innocent accident. I had no idea eating pizza would make me fat. Im having lap band surgery too, and they should pay mg bill.

... worst thing ive read on ats in a long time. Just ugh.