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Originally posted by lbndhr
I have been married going on 23 years. Youngest child is 21 all 3 children out if home. We have 1 full size bathrooms 1 being smaller. I have repeatedly asked for my own bathroom taking the smaller one as to being fair. He "said" ok to my request BUT he won't stop using my supposedly bathroom. Firstly, am I wrong for wanting pretty smell good no beard hair in sink no urine around toilet bathroom? If I'm right how do I get him to stay out if my bathroom. For the records the smaller bathroom I said I would take is on the opposite side of the house the bug bathroom is in master bedroom. Thanks for any advice. Peace
Originally posted by CoherentlyConfused
We have 2 1/2 baths: The master (which is mine), a smaller one in the upstairs hall, which is his and 1/2 bath downstairs. He still uses mine and messes it up. I clean it, just like any other room that gets used. He cleans his and I use it. We all use the downstairs bathroom. How "yours" do you need it to be? It's a bathroom. It's not like anyone lives in there, is it?edit on 24-7-2011 by CoherentlyConfused because: (no reason given)
Originally posted by lbndhr
reply to post by mblahnikluver
Yes he has his own man space, he has an office, the garage and the work shed all to which are nicely insulated and heat-colling system. And yes I want it so girly men will hate the site of it. thank you
Originally posted by beezzer
reply to post by lbndhr
Take it over. Scented soaps, pink towels, frilly stuff.
Put a magazine rack in "his" a mini fridge stocked with his favorite beer and a tv in there.
He'll never leave it.
Originally posted by aero56
reply to post by CoherentlyConfused
I think there is more to this than just the bathroom issue. It sounds like the hubby smothers all other spaces and rooms. The deeper issue is he may be smothering her.
The sage experiences without abstraction,
And accomplishes without action;
(S)he accepts the ebb and flow of things,
Nurtures them, but does not own them,
And lives, but does not dwell.
----
When the Way is forgotten
Duty and justice appear;
----
When harmonious relationships dissolve
Then respect and devotion arise;
----
Do not control the people with laws,
Nor violence nor espionage,
But conquer them with inaction.
----
For:
The more morals and taboos there are,
The more cruelty afflicts people;
----
The more laws and taxes there are,
The more theft corrupts people.
----
Yet take no action, and the people nurture each other;
Make no laws, and the people deal fairly with each other;
Own no interest, and the people cooperate with each other;
Express no desire, and the people harmonize with each other.
----
Water overcomes the stone;
Without substance it requires no opening;
This is the benefit of taking no action.
----
A nation is like a hierarchy, a marketplace, and a maiden.
A maiden wins her husband by submitting to his advances;
Submission is a means of union.
So when a large country submits to a small country
It will adopt the small country;
When a small country submits to a large country
It will be adopted by the large country;
The one submits and adopts;
The other submits and is adopted.
It is in the interest of a large country to unite and gain service,
And in the interest of a small country to unite and gain patronage;
If both would serve their interests,
Both must submit.
Originally posted by Dogdish
reply to post by lbndhr
That sounds about right. He probably doesn't even realize that he's doing it, either.
Men his age, about the same as mine, weren't actually raised to do it; but we saw what we saw, and that was our fathers and grandfathers making the decisions and ruling the roost.
That's not to say that in their mind they were only in it for themselves, far from it! Men like to spoil their wives, if possible, and I think this leads to an "I know what's best" mentality.
Obviously; in the example above, the mother's and grandmothers were involved in the decisions, but that was not nearly as obvious, as the moms/grandmoms used the old 'feminine wiles' tactic to make it 'his' decision, I think.
I also think a shower and a bath daily is a bit much for a retired person, but like everything else in my post here, it's just my opinion.