"Don't Be Alarmed. We're Martians"

Don't be alarmed; we've spoken to people before!

Joe Simonton
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The world of ufology and the reports of UFO sightings combine to make one of the weirdest areas of human interest we know of. Where else do people make claims of being chased down highways by lights in the sky? Where else can people seriously fall out with each other over whether unidentified lights are demons, aliens or time-travelling future-beings? It’s one of the few subjects that seems to have the creeping ability to turn its followers crazy.

At the far end of the UFO enigma is a great place populated by all flavours of wacked-out wonders, tall tales and colourful critters. In this fading place are the humanoids and robots. These are the good folk from ‘elsewhere.’ They used to come bearing messages and simultaneously committing their witnesses to a life-time of bad jokes and ridicule. You were given the experience of a lifetime…at a price.

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As an example we have the legend of Joe Simonton and his pancakes. . Back in ’61, Joe was taking it easy and getting ready for a late breakfast. He heard something outside and went to look. No doubt the last thing he expected to find was a strange craft right there on his doorstep. A hatch was open and three men in black roll-neck tops stood ready to prepare food. One of them motioned to him that he needed water and offered a ‘two-handled silver jug’; Joe filled the jug and returned it to the occupant. To cut to the chase, the guys cooked what Joe called ‘pancakes’ and gave him four of them to eat. The craft they were in shut up shop and flew away.

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Joe’s pancakes were taken for analysis by the local university and by the USAF. Nobody who interviewed Joe doubted that he believed his story. Even J Allen Hynek believed that Joe wasn’t lying and instead it was listed in Blue Book as 'hallucination.'

He kept one (whatever happened to it?) and defended himself in Flying Saucer Review 1962 (May-June). This was in response to a guy who doubted him for his lack of description regarding what shoes they wore...

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Simonton was accused of lying or hoaxing by outsiders and who can blame them? Spacemen with pancakes? It’s too absurd to be true...

The main reason for this thread is to resurrect an equally bizarre case. As stories go, it used to be very well known and has faded from sight in the same way our unusual ‘visitors’ have done. In IsaacKoi's Top 100 UFO Cases it comes in at #72 (bibliography).



In April 1964, a dairy farmer called Gary T. Wilcox claimed to have noticed a ‘shining’ object across the fields and had a walk over to see what it was. As he got closer, he thought it was a car and then an aircraft part. It became apparent that he was seeing a large egg-like object floating ‘2 feet off the ground.’ As anyone would, he touched the object and wondered what the heck it was? Before he knew it, two humanoids sprung up and began talking to him. They each carried a silver tray with a piece of turf inside. In his account, his first thoughts were that he was on TV for Candid Camera and a big hoax was happening. Until the encounter was over, he continued to suspect that someone was yanking his chain…

The two figures introduced themselves…“Don’t be alarmed! We’ve spoken to people before.”

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The first thing I noticed was that it was off the ground, it was a little bigger than a car in length. (Note 1) It was an oblong shape something like an egg. There were no seams, rivets or anything like that. It was completely smooth. It was aluminum color. I touched the thing and the metal was harder than aluminum and it did not move. (Note 2) I don't know whether it was on legs or hovering in the air. It was about 20 ft. in length, 4 ft. high and 15 or 16 ft. wide. While (I was) feeling it there was no vibration or sound and it was not hot or anything. While I was touching it, two (2) small men (Note 3) about 4 ft. high came out from under the tank object. I don't know where they came from. Each of them was carrying a tray about a foot square. The tray looked like it was made of the same stuff the ship (tank) was made of. Inside the tray was what appeared to be sod. I was standing about a foot away from the ship.

A Newark Valley Farmer's Trip Into the Twilight Zone

As the account continues, the conversation went on for around an hour and half and covered a few interesting topics. They spoke of Gary’s work as a farmer and asked him about fertiliser and how he went about growing food. He explained what farming was about and offered to let them have a bag of fertiliser for free…

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The figures (as related in the interview) were about 4’ tall and had no features at all. They were humanoid and were head to Martian toe in a ‘uniform’ that seemed to be made of the same material as the craft. They were each utterly featureless with no pockets, seams, mouthpieces or eyes; the only thing Wilcox noticed about them was when they raised an arm, a single crease would form at the elbow. The heads were as wide as the shoulders; no necks.

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As you can hear in the interview, the ‘Martian’ speaker was seemingly against humans trying to leave the planet. It spoke of the atmosphere being too thin for humans on Mars or elsewhere.

They then walked back under the ship and disappeared. They ducked a little bit when they went under it. The ship then seemed to hover. I heard a noise that sounded like a car motor idling. It was not loud. Then it just took off slowly forward above the ground in a gliding manner and flew over the valley in the direction of (Ed) Sokoloski's barn and disappeared into the air after it was about 150 ft. away. There was no heat, blasting, wind, dust, noise (other than the idling sound), light, or anything else left behind when the ship took off.

"They did not try to harm me in any way and there was nothing with them that looked like a weapon. They did not raise or lower their voice. It was the same throughout the conversation. They did most of the talking.

Wilcox’ experience occurred some few hours before the more well-known Socorro Incident. . Wilcox was interviewed by NICAP’s Walt Webber and an investigator from APRO. In the years since, the account has been discussed in articles in FSR and by Jerome Clark.

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He hasn’t been shown to be hoaxing, but it’s just one man’s bizarre account and difficult to say either way. In the intervening years, Wilcox hasn’t added to the account or courted publicity. He made no money, attracted very little fame or notoriety and went on to have a successful career as an IBM line-manager and construction firm owner…

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Journal of UFO History

During 1968, a Dr Berthold Schwarz began to research the account and apparently gained access to the police statement made by Wilcox. In the report, he detailed some of the comments Wilcox said were made by these ‘Martians.’ They had warned of Man’s attempts to become spacefaring and predicted that two astronauts and two cosmonauts would meet their deaths within a year. They named names.

According to Schwarz, in Wilcox’ police statement of ’64 he mentioned John Glenn, Virgil 'Gus' Grissom , Vladimir M. Komarov and another unnamed cosmonaut.

Most anyone with an ounce of intelligence and the ability to search the internet will know that prophecies are BS and never come true. When they supposedy come true, it’s after the fact…’Yeah, well I said that would happen.’ We’re not talking about predicting the score-line or that old Uncle Jebediah won’t see another winter. Prophecies are big predictions.

John Glenn
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Vladimir Komarov
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Virgil 'Gus' Grissom
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‘Gus’ Grissom and Vladimir Komarov died in 1967 during attempted spaceflight. John Glenn is alive and well. The prophecy failed in terms of ‘within a year,’ failed with John Glenn and probably failed with the unnamed cosmonaut. Was it all-wrong, half-right or the same old BS of any prophecy?

Without seeing the police report, speculation and experience will be the judge.

What remains mysterious is why people came forward with accounts that were so bizarre they were unbelievable. Wilcox retained a good reputation, his story was an anomaly in his life and a strange story to be told in the books listed in IsaacKoi’s bibliography.

Simonton, Zammora and Wilcox weren’t unusual in their accounts. From the 50s until the late 70s, many have made similar claims. They didn’t gain rewards, didn’t court publicity and tried to put it behind them. If we take the accounts on face value, there’s little to support the idea that ‘Martians,’ pancake-chefs or fleeing spacemen land in isolated areas and interact with chance observers.

On the other hand, if you (the reader) were going to fabricate a tall tale of visiting extra-terrestrials would you offer pancakes, prophecies and fleeing short aliens as plausible factors?

What could make people come forward with these claims? Did they fall down the rabbit-hole of anomalous experience or become ‘one-time’ victims of grand hallucinations? Are they all liars, hoaxers and chancers looking for a moment of fame?

Or were the claimants of these encounters unknowing actors in a Candid Camera show for the folk from ‘elsewhere?

-ETA: you can download the interview as mp3 at this link over here.

Meals Without Wheels

Extra Toppings!

"Our Pancakes Are Out Of This World"

Get em while they're hot.

Joe: Got any Hotdogs?

Alien: No just Pancakes!

Joe: I'll take Four.

Great thread and interesting points. I always wondered about some of these UFO witnesses whether they could be on the up and up. What did they have to gain with these wild stories? Your thread brought to mind George Adamski and his wild assertions.

George Adamski

Originally posted by Chipkin9
Meals Without Wheels

Extra Toppings!

"Our Pancakes Are Out Of This World"

Get em while they're hot.

Joe: Got any Hotdogs?

Alien: No just Pancakes!

Joe: I'll take Four.

edit on 25-4-2011 by Chipkin9 because: (no reason given)

edit on 25-4-2011 by Chipkin9 because: (no reason given)

Your post...

Hot girls drinking beer..

Op.. Nice thread..

reply to post by Kandinsky


looks like those pancakes are overcooked.

Landing and sharing pancakes with a human may seem odd to us but maybe it was an experiment carried out by them. A form of interaction. Kind of like Jane Goodall sharing a Banana with a Gorilla.
We have no way of knowing how an Alien is going to react and what info they are looking for. I would think they look at us like we are children but are aware of how violent we can be.

Originally posted by TheLieWeLive
Landing and sharing pancakes with a human may seem odd to us but maybe it was an experiment carried out by them. A form of interaction. Kind of like Jane Goodall sharing a Banana with a Gorilla.
We have no way of knowing how an Alien is going to react and what info they are looking for. I would think they look at us like we are children but are aware of how violent we can be.

Well stated. I've given dogs treats before to get them to like me (and not attack me). Why wouldn't an ET be in the same mindset? Especially one that had studied me for any length of time. "Feed her once and she will be your loyal friend forever!"

OP-- your post is put together very well and makes for an interesting read. I hadn't come across these accounts yet. Thanks!

reply to post by Kandinsky


Hello Kadinsky,

Do you know anything of Simonton's life after the incident? Did he live a normal life, albeit with some unwanted notoriety, or did anything else strange happen to him?

Originally posted by TheLieWeLive
We have no way of knowing how an Alien is going to react and what info they are looking for...

How do you even know the beings Simonton saw her aliens?

How do you even know the beings Simonton saw her aliens?

How do we know they weren't? Isn't all of this just speculation?

Love the story...... that's a galatic neighbor for ya......why stories always end up with anal probe and mutilation....mysterious sh1t.....they should be like this one....stop by for water to make pancake, making normal conversation, asking for some backyard plant's sample, .....etc

reply to post by Kandinsky


Best A & U thread for a long time Kdinks
S and F
I don't know, I like your thinking, why would aliens not be interested in the most wonderful invention humankind has to offer...pancakes.... in fact it makes perfect sense to me and lends their tale far more credence that a rectal probe in a craft in the zeta reticuli system.

And taking a soil sample, that kinda makes more sense too.

I cant thank you enough for these weird and wacky stories, that seem to be the most sensible encounter accounts I have heard to date

Originally posted by TheLieWeLive
How do we know they weren't? Isn't all of this just speculation?

They didn't do anything alien, they didn't even look any weirder than having piercing eyes and a very fair complexion. Fair being emphasized for a reason. If this had taken place five-hundred years earlier, we'd be talking about this as an encounter with fairies, not aliens.

reply to post by Kandinsky


Great thread! I found a few interesting encounters on listverse listverse.com... Believe it or not~

reply to post by TheLieWeLive
Good points. Back then, the contactee assumed they were 'aliens' and the people who they reported the encounters to had few explanations. In Simonton's case it was 'hallucination' and in Wilcox' case, it remained unknown.

With the cases being so bizarre it's natural to dismiss them as hoaxes and dreams. When they said 'we're from Mars,' we assume that Wilcox was ill-informed about Mars being barren. When other contactees (not the BS artists), said they'd been told Venus was lively, or that there were 10 planets in the solar system, we conclude that the 'contactee' was making stuff up.

Since the mid-60s, some people began to wonder if the 'folk from elsewhere' were the ones making stuff up? The scenarios seemed too absurd to be the actions of explorers. This has caused guys like Jacques Vallee to question the whole notion of 'explorers.' "How many soil samples do they need to take?" He asks.

Who's to say it's the soil that's being sampled? If it was a study in human behaviour, there'd be more than one participant towards a larger population sample. The absurdity might only matter to us as we try and make sense of it all. From a pigeon's point of view, having to peck a big red button to get seed is pretty absurd too.

Whatever the case and whether these events really occured, or didn't, they slowly came to an end by the end of the 1970s.

Here's another bizarre account from France...

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@Winged Bull (DR)

Do you know anything of Simonton's life after the incident? Did he live a normal life, albeit with some unwanted notoriety, or did anything else strange happen to him?

Within a couple of weeks he was to regret making the story known. Other than his letter to FSR (February 22 1962), he appears to have fallen back into a normal life. He remained in Eagle River until his death in April 1972.

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Am I the only one that sees the genius in that sketch design? I mean if that was made in real life that design would work! better then anything we have.

jus wonderin if anyone else noticed.

Tell ya what:
If an ET came around and wanted to be neighborly, I'd invite it/him, get a bucket of KFC extra crispy, share a beer and cigar and watch female beach volleyball

The pancake story almost seems like a dare to me. This is probably how it went down...

Tulit: "Hey Poriatyo, I dare you to fly down there and serve that farmer pancakes. I bet he freaks out!"

Poriatyo: "You're on! But five bucks says he doesn't lose it."

Tulit: "Make it 10 bucks!"

Poriatyo lands behind the farmer's house and opens the hatch.

Poriatyo: "Hey farmer guy, I'm a crazy alien in a spaceship. Can I have some water to make you pancakes?"

Farmer: "Haha sure thing. Oh and you guys kind of look like chicks."

Tulit: "Dammit!"

Poriatyo: "It's ok. I spit in his pancakes. Oh and you owe me 10 bucks."

reply to post by midwest


I dont like making light of serious situations, but you made me giggle with that one.

reply to post by Kandinsky


Woah now, this thread is a refresher!

And a fully deserved S&F, mister! Thank you for providing us with interesting food for thought.