The government is trying to take my newborn!!

First of all - leaving "the kid" and coming home to sit browsing the net is a not very "mumsy" thing to do, unless you're looking for cuddly teddy wallpaper for the nursery. It doesn't matter how you see it, it's how others see it. I hope this a hoax because the thought of a child being taken from the mother makes me sick. Some folk don't know how to show emotions (the right way), and if you appear uncaring or incapable in any way the chances are you'll lose. If the maternal instinct hasn't set in yet you should pretend it has, till it does. And it will. I hope it's a hoax because if you're genuine the comments on this thread aren't going to make you feel better either, if anything they're gonna make you feel bad, especially if you've had a history of depression. And getting upset just after having a baby can be catastrophic.I had my first son at 30 weeks. I left the hospital after four days. If they'd offered, maybe I'd have come home the first day. Hospital is crap and there's no baby next to you in a cot when it's a premature birth. It was such a shock to be a mum so quickly, (one day there's a tiny bump next day there's a human being next to me). I had no maternal feelings those first few days either. Just the shock. I didn't get him home for six weeks and chose to bus every other day for a couple of hours of time. It's nothing to be ashamed of just because you came home, but don't let folk think you don't care if you really do. Your baby is number one, always will be. If she's not then let others do the job for you. Who phoned you? This is the most unbelievable part. I'd imagine in cases like this you'd be sent an appointment for a meeting or something???

[edit on 15-10-2007 by wigit]

LostNemesis said,

Sure. I had some complications with this pregnancy, mainly one called "Weakened cervix", which called for a "cerclage" to be put in place, basically to stitch and hold the cervix together to help carry longer.

That right there tells me she probably left AMA (Against Medical Advice).
She could have complications after delivery ie- possible risk of a hemorrhage. I won't judge you, but you should have stayed in the hospital.

Originally posted by kosmicjack
Sorry honey...As a mom, I am dubious that any hospital, anywhere would release any woman 24 hours after child birth, natural or not.

I went to full term but was released with my baby the next day (he was born 10.30 pm and we were home by 3.00pm next day), this is common practice in UK as long as both Mother and child are checked out first.

That said...

Originally posted by kosmicjack
I smell a rat...

Something is not right here. For many reasons, particularly the OPs reference to 'the kid' stands out. I wouldn't want to say that the story is a fabrication but I at the very least wonder if the Drs may have recommended a psychiatric assessment of the Mother...if she has just gone through childbirth her posts certainly indicate a level of detachment that I find worrying - perhaps this is why the hospital reacted as they did...

Originally posted by LostNemesis
I wanted to come home and work, and TOLD the hospital then and there that the baby's father and I would be in tonight to see the kid, and finish whatever other paperwork they wanted.

I don't know a great deal about childbirth but common sense would suggest that a woman with a weekened cervix who's just given birth would probably need longer in recovery as she'd be at higher risk of infection., and they'd want the mother to bond with the baby anyway. Given you refer to your own daughter as 'the kid' .. it sounds as though you haven't bonded at all and weren't interested as you put work first and act as though the paperwork was the main issue about leaving the hospital [and newborn daughter] early.

..and I sincerly doubt your employer would expect so much.

I really had no idea that I would need to be there every second of everyday that my premature little one was stuck in NICU,

She's only been there 1 day and youre already calling it "every second of every day"..? Yep.. sounds really inconvenient..

I hope your story is a wind up and am assuming as much but if it's not.. I'm glad your daughter has people watching out for her.

[edit on 15-10-2007 by riley]

Originally posted by Kruel

Originally posted by ModernDystopia

Originally posted by Kruel
What are you supposed to do... live in the hospital for a couple weeks until your child is released?

I hope this is a joke. Thousands of RESPONSIBLE moms get out of work on paternity leave and yes, do live in the hospital while their child rehabilitates.

Christ, the Idiocracy is taking over.

Not everyone gets paid leave. Most people where I work (including myself) are contractors. If I don't work, I don't get paid, simple as that.

And lay off the personal flames.

I'll lay off the personal flames when I start seeing an influx of people on this site with more than 3 brain cells. Simple as that.

Originally posted by ModernDystopia
I'll lay off the personal flames when I start seeing an influx of people on this site with more than 3 brain cells. Simple as that.

Here, take one of these:


Along with this:

I dont know what to say about your story. But I, as a mother, would NEVER EVER EVER leave the hospital (for selfish reasons) and not stay with my baby who was in NICU. That just boggles this mother's mind And I could go on and on about all the wrong things you said in this post.

But I will just assume this is not real and a made up story. Nice.

[edit on 15-10-2007 by greeneyedleo]

I doubt this story is legitamite, but if everything the op says is true, I feel there is at least reasonable doubt wether she is a proper parent or not.

I'm sorry if I'm wrong, but you make yourself look like that, op.

[edit on 15-10-2007 by enigmania]

Ok i do feel the need to add something to this thread.

Three days ago a friend of mine gave birth to a baby girl, she carried for 8 and a half months i believe (might be 8 months hard to remember which she said). The girl was born by C section, healthy and happy, my friend was kept on morphine in the hospital for 12 hours and is now home with her child.

Basically that part of the OP's post stands up for me.

What doesn't stand up is the fact you left the hospital. I can tell you now if my child had been born under such circumstances you would have to call the police and physically drag me, kicking and screaming from that hospital.

i don't believe you either.
i call my 11 year old son my 'kid' sometims...i would not call my newborn infant that was born premie just last night 'the kid'

you=lying or are more depressed than you think.

sorry. just giving an honest opinion....

when my son was born via c-section 11 years ago, i did not leave the hospital for 4 days..was NOT leaving there without my son.

i know some people just are not parental but what you said is just cold.

reply to post by pjslug


You basically said what I was going to say. Well said post.

I don't mean it in an insulting way, but I also get the feeling that you, OP, may be a drug addict. Again, I mean no offense at all.

If this is the case, I really suggest you get help with this. If you truly had a baby, are truly on drugs, are truly battling CPS, and truly care about your baby, please, if not for your own sake, for your child's sake, get some professional help. That will go a LONG WAY in giving yourself a better image in their eyes.

I'm only 19, I'm not married, no kids, nothing - and I know what's right and what's wrong here. You don't leave your child, especially after a premature birth.

But maybe you made a mistake there. It's not the end of the world. And I doubt the depression thing is that big of an issue.

What I do think, however, is there's something that CPS knows that you didn't tell us. Whatever that is, you need to get that fixed. If you care about your baby, don't let her get put in some foster home and never knowing her true parents. Unless you want her growing up depressed and possibly doing drugs, don't put her through going through life without true parents.

Go get help, and fully commit to it. You owe it to your daughter.

And since I'm an ATS atheist, I'll have a "moment of silence" for her.

Sorry but, I smell something funny!!!

This thread has my wind up.

I'm smelling a troll here.

See, I have two kids I had by C-section. My first kid I wouldn't let them take out of the room. They had to practically hold me down to get her away from me for tests and so that I could rest. I didn't put that child down voluntarily for six months. It was like she was velcroed to me.

The second kid, I let them take him to the nursery so I could sleep, but every second he was with me I spent looking at him, touching him, smelling him and smiling goofily at him. first thing in the morning after I woke up, I'd buzz the nurse for my son.

The overwhelming rush of hormones at the birth of a child was stronger than any rush from any drug EVER. I fell so hard and so fast for those kids ... I can't even begin to imagine how any woman who was of sound mind and emotional capacity could walk out of a hospital within the first 24 hours, without the child.

If my kids were in NICU they'd have had to sedate me to drag me away from them.

So this story isn't adding up for me.

With all due respect, because I've been known to be wrong before, I don't buy this story. It seems trollish to me. Two plus two in this case is equaling about 7.9, which is the wrong answer.

If you are telling the truth, then I think there is something drastically wrong in your emotions because I don't believe any woman who has not got a deep problem could be so cavalier about leaving their child in the NICU and go off to work, as blase as if leaving a shirt at the dry cleaners.

But I seriously don't think this story is true. Some of it might be true, but it's all off and my alarm bells are going four alarm here.

This does not add up.

Care to tell us the real truth? Maybe then we can help you. Or, this is all just a diversion and someone who has not even been pregnant is enjoying watching us all chase our tails.

Would you like to tell us which? If not, I must assume the latter.

If this is true, which I doubt, it sounds like they did the right thing. You show no Maternal Instincts whatsoever in what you wrote. They should have had to drag you and your boyfriend away so they could tend to your child. You make this sound like you were cooking a new recipe and it did not come out right.

Have you been diagnosed as a Functional Autistic or as having Sociopath Tendencies? This does not sound like depression. I sounds like something else. It sounds like you made this story up to get attention. If not it is something worse and you should seek some help and cooperate with the Child Services and let them help you.

Ok I really don't want to even give you any energy but I can't help myself just this once.

Your story stinks and you are no Mother.

I will now find out what the ignore button is all about , and as for you, oh never mind your're not worth it.

Never never leave your child unattended at a hospital or anywhere for that matter.

I don't like you.

I feel very sorry for your innocent Daughter.

Assuming what you say is true, probably best you go on back to the hospital and be with your premature child.

When my dad had leukemia, I slept on the floor of his hospital room. I was all freaked out - and that was just my dad...... I can't imagine leaving a child.

As far as "getting back to work" - there are laws in place under the Family Emergency Medical Act - that can give you up to a year off for an immediate family member.

I'm trying real hard not to pass judgement here, but maybe you need to relook at your priorities a bit.

Originally posted by MajorMalfunction

If my kids were in NICU they'd have had to sedate me to drag me away from them.

I sat in the Hospital for two days with my wife and my baby and there was nothing wrong. I refused to leave until both my Wife and the Baby could come with me. They actually tried to send me home with my Daughter and send my Wife home the next day and I refused to leave. I called my Boss the next day to tell him where I was and he only asked if he could bring me anything. This whole story smells.

So...

you gave birth to a premature baby that you call "the kid"...remember? you said you and your husband told the hospital you would be by tonight to see "the kid"...and you left to go back to work. And you're hanging out on an internet discussion board instead of being

1. with "the kid",
2. at work - unless your work is discussing your sad behavior on an internet discussion board.

YOU MAKE ME SICK!

GET YOUR FRIGGIN' TUBES TIED!

Originally posted by LostNemesis
Sure. I had some complications with this pregnancy, mainly one called "Weakened cervix", which called for a "cerclage" to be put in place, basically to stitch and hold the cervix together to help carry longer.
Basically that did help to carry a few months longer. At 4 months, the water was exposed and coming out, this was the only hope to carry the baby longer.

I have a fear of hospitals as it is, who doesn't?
Also with knowing that labor could (and DID) happen at anytime, there was no way to plan for time off work on the due date. Plain and simple, I wanted to come home and work, and TOLD the hospital then and there that the baby's father and I would be in tonight to see the kid, and finish whatever other paperwork they wanted. They agreed, and let me go, expecting to see the father and I after I got off work TONIGHT. There was no word from them that they would be turning this over to child services.

I really had no idea that I would need to be there every second of everyday that my premature little one was stuck in NICU, or face losing her. And still have no idea what my depression as a teen has to do with anything.

I don't condone you for leaving the baby there at the hospital. You for one shouldn't BE working. For crying out loud you just had a baby. And I should call and give your boss a piece of my mind for making you come in.

Leaving you daughter was wrong- thats what motherhood is about- responsibility.

However- you told the hospital what you had to do and they let allowed you to leave. The State can be fickle. Did the father show up at the hospital? And are you two in good standings? (The last thing you need along with this mess is a deadbeat dad. If this is so then getting your daughter back maybe much harder.) But I don't want to see you on here on the board chatting with people while your baby is in the hospital.

I wish you the best of luck and I will say a prayer for you and your baby daughter.

Listen up-ATS members
People make mistakes too don't judge them because your no more perfect then they are.

Originally posted by Valhall
So...

you gave birth to a premature baby that you call "the kid"...remember? you said you and your husband told the hospital you would be by tonight to see "the kid"...and you left to go back to work. And you're hanging out on an internet discussion board instead of being

1. with "the kid",
2. at work - unless your work is discussing your sad behavior on an internet discussion board.

YOU MAKE ME SICK!

GET YOUR FRIGGIN' TUBES TIED!

Oh thats classic go ahead a humiliate her all over the board Valhall. Wether or not she chooses to do that or not- its not my business or yours for that matter.

She didn't ask YOU to be her Judge- Jury- and Executioner...
The only thing I see is your sad behavior. (I'm sorry I won't stand for this and listen to someone's harsh criticism because the OP made a mistake.)