Silent Moments --In Memory of Beloved Member TDDA

I'm really going to miss her.
She was a beautiful and brilliant person. I wish I had more time to get to know her; I could tell that she was something special right away.

I always loved our conversations about everything ranging from theoretical phenomenology to life experiences and tasty recipes. She always had something interesting and eye-opening to contribute, and I looked forward to her posts on ATS.

Most importantly, she was an absolute master at making people smile. She had that down to a science.

Rest in Peace, TDDA. 🤍

Now I'll check in again. I would first like to apologize for my rude manner, I wasn't quite myself that day. I just didn't want to be hit on again under the circumstances. Had three very long days with over 16 hours of driving and hardly any sleep, which came from a situation that I have never had to go through before. Bear with me, please.

She left us in peace and without pain. I won't say more publicly about that day here because I don't know the dynamic and want to protect her privacy. I would like to leave a few words about her, too.

She was a wonderful person in her own way. Not only did she lovingly care for her daughter, but she also cared for everyone in her gravitational field if they let her. Her avatar sums it up quite well: playful and full of joy for life, caring and loving like a mother - towards everyone - and very smart. It was amazing how quickly she could acquire knowledge; she soaked it up like a sponge. She was very generous and always happy to share her knowledge and resources.

She was hot-headed at times, but that was just how she was, she had fire and wasn't a sleeping pill. Had a mind of her own. She could inspire in a way that is difficult to explain. Not only could she build engines and cars, she could also drive them like hell. I believe that was the reason for her success and respect. The whole package was right for her and what she did was authentic and consistent. Passionate.

She taught me how to drift back then and I was also able to learn a lot from her. We liked drifting together, it was just nice to shoot around the track with her, next door to each other. Now she's gone and has left a big gap everywhere. I feel very sorry for her daughter, her little counterpart. On Dyno Fridays she always handed out water – and sometimes imaginary cake, the sweet little mouse. She's already a great person, that's for sure.

We will all miss our friend dearly.

And now something to the person who was stalking her:

I was very busy here today and I'm not the only one observing the situation here.

Get over it because it's pointless. No matter who started it, the thing is over now. She can no longer defend herself. You don't vilify a dead person, so let it go. You don't want to mess with the southern German scene, which also includes lawyers who will take it very personally (StGb §189).

They already have your photos, with your face from several angles as well as other information that you have willingly shared here over the years, where you live, where you come from, your mobile phone operator, your escapades with the Freising public prosecutor's office. All the information you spilled. As I said, I was very busy on this site today to protect my friend.

Just let it be and nothing will happen. Go your way in peace and you won't have any problems. Nobody here wants to do it but we won't tolerate it.

I don't really post here anymore but I had to say she is very sorely missed and I really loved our chats about anything from German language, she loved etymology and unravelling history too, and spiritual matters and meditation, and of course food!
I know her soul is currently voyaging the unknown in a happy and free manner, just cut far far too short...
Sei mit Gott, liebe Freund

a reply to: zosimov

Ruhe in Frieden, Duck.

--Cav

First of all, I'd like to apologize for the odd form for a tribute. I posted this short story as a personal tribute anonymously very shortly after I'd heard the sad news (btw, I'm certain TDDA wouldn't want the sadness to overcome the joy of knowing her). It was sort of therapy for me and I didn't expect too many people to read it, maybe just the short story crew who knew TDDA so well.

In any case, it's good to be here with friends who loved and cared for TDDA, who I am blessed to call a friend.

I'll most likely add more here later.


For now I'd like to add something she wrote to me about a wonderful book she'd recommended, The Hidden Life of Trees, by Peter Wohlleben:

And if a tree was kind of a good soul, even after cutting down, if the stem is alive, the other trees give it nutrients, because itself can not to photosynthesis.

From the nutrients we're giving here, and the love TDDA's getting elsewhere, it's clear what a good soul she was. What's not so easy to explain is that the nutrients are still coming from her in return. I feel as if I'll continue benefitting from her friendship forever.
🤍🤍🤍

I am truly sorry for the loss. I don’t know a lot of people on this forum but from what I can see and the outpouring I am one who thinks that this person was a kind and beautiful soul. When someone like that leaves this place, our lives get a little less bright, only for a time as the universe seeks a balance and brings someone else into our lives who is someone we recognize from before.

They will be missed, I am sure by those who knew her, and for those who are experiencing that loss, do not mourn, because their lives were much more meaningful for the good they brought to your lives, than the sadness of losing someone. God and the universe always find balance and our lives are not meant to last forever. Take your memories and pay them forward, and be the kind of person that their memory inspires.

I wish you all peace in your time of loss. Take Care.
a reply to: zosimov

What happened to TDDA?

a reply to: rickymouse

Rickymouse, TDDA was having trouble with the defib she'd had installed last November (2022). She went in on Dec 27th to have it replaced, and the replacement surgery didn't work, so spent several weeks under 24/7 watch, during which she was communicating with me and others on Discord (even after a heart attack!).

She had another procedure on Jan 15, this time was hoping to have a smaller and less intrusive device placed, but there were complications during the surgery and she did not make it.

She was in good hands with a dear friend and at peace for her last moments here.

a reply to: zosimov

Tragic news about TDDA.

ATS will be a poorer place for her passing....but it was a better place thanks to her contributions.

a reply to: zosimov

I hate to hear this, we have lost some amazing people here, but we were and have been blessed to know them, and see that side of a person you don't see in public. it's odd that on an anonymous message board, you can see a window into the soul, where in real life, you only see the persona displayed, unless you really spend time with a person.

She was like minded, so we didn't have disagreements. She was intelligent, so I learned things from her. And she was kind, so it's my hope that everyone who interacted with her learned how to shine through and radiate kindness. I didn't know her like some here, and I regret that. But sadly, in situations like this, you do get to learn more about a person that you should have when they were here to interact with.

Please don't let things go unsaid with those you care about.

Wonderful tribute zosimov, you continue to show what class looks like in print.

originally posted by: zosimov
a reply to: rickymouse

Rickymouse, TDDA was having trouble with the defib she'd had installed last November (2022). She went in on Dec 27th to have it replaced, and the replacement surgery didn't work, so spent several weeks under 24/7 watch, during which she was communicating with me and others on Discord (even after a heart attack!).

She had another procedure on Jan 15, this time was hoping to have a smaller and less intrusive device placed, but there were complications during the surgery and she did not make it.

She was in good hands with a dear friend and at peace for her last moments here.

Wow, sad to hear that she died. She will be missed, she seemed to have a nice personality.

a reply to: zosimov

I think you did a good job here. My start could have been better...

She loved books and if she liked being here then everything you did was right. Even though there won't be a memorial service, I know that she would have much preferred it if people got together and had a little fun. Instead of having sad faces. She once said something along these lines, back when we were still setting lap times, before she was pregnant. Something like “Boys, when I turn into the forest at the fox tube, then you celebrate the beautiful moments like now instead of feeling sad.” Something like that, it was a long time ago.

Unfortunately I have to correct one thing, but it's not bad. Somewhere you used the quote from my email, those weren't her words, it's a saying that I translated with the translator. Therefore, the “you” is again wrong, which probably misled into thinking that. I'm sorry for the confusion.

I shall miss you, Duck. RIP.

TDDA was a new member here and I put up a thread to honor her.

a reply to: zosimov

PM4U

How did I miss this?

I woke up in a rank mood, and now I know why.

The world was a better place thanks to people like TDDA.

She will be immensely missed.

RIP TDDA

When the veil lifted and forms drifted away, when the magic appeared and the path was transformed in the light, the old alphabet had quietly arranged itself, to the song of all time... Bright moonlight broke and focused on certainty, the wind said that everything falls into place and always accompanies me.

Like you do now. Your light has risen from your fleshy shadow and spreads over everything that lives. The alphabet of your life consisted of intuition, you didn't look at the world outside, you were within yourself, entered it like a library just as your spirit was, constant, instructive and strong in spirit.

The path became a journey, the journey became a path. Your breath sank deeper, into the mantra of the songs, and with this strength you flew away. Fate was woven for you, your faith carried you away in peaceful certainty, with a whispering voice, into new adventures.

Your alphabet of life was intuition, your thoughts free like birds, your love warming like the sun, your laughter like bells that invited me to the service of happiness. You left but left something here for everyone you touched with your soul and hugged with your heart. You were beyond unique and yet so grounded.

You left and still left a part of yourself in this world, your footprints on the path to inner peace and happiness, the impressions of your soul left in the soil of my life. I can see these on nice mornings, like today.

a reply to: Naftalin

A truly beautiful epitaph, Naftalin.

a reply to: Naftalin

This is absolutely beautiful, Naftalin. Thank you for sharing here with us--so well captures our friend's extraordinary and generous spirit and her love of nature's magic. A powerful and lovely tribute; I'll be revisiting these words with a smile.