My husband passed away

I also know the loss. You're right, when Dedee died my our collective future and plans just vaporized. I'm still trying to find my identity and a future path.

a reply to: ChiefD

I have no words just this song. It has helped me through a lot.



Sorry for your loss.

a reply to: ChiefD
I am so very sorry for you loss!
From your posts, I could tell how devoted you were to each other.

It sounds like you are slowly working through your grief, I pray this will continue.
Blessings to you.

I am so sorry to hear about your loss, and you have my deepest condolences and prayers. Our spouses are our other half. I plan for everything, but like a bene gesserit - that's the one place I dare not look. I pray you find healing and peace and work through this time in your life.

a reply to: ChiefD

God Bless you. That youre here expressing to us is a monumental thing in moving forward. You can let go. You can hang on. But are they not the same thing?

My mother left a note when she passed. "Dont worry because Im gone, just away for awhile. For we will meet again."

I believe that. You should too! Blessings this day to you and yours!!!

a reply to: ChiefD

Very sorry for your loss.

Offering our condolences and prayers.

1Pe 1:3  Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, which according to his abundant mercy hath begotten us again unto a lively hope by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 
1Pe 1:4  To an inheritance incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fadeth not away, reserved in heaven for you, 
1Pe 1:5  Who are kept by the power of God through faith unto salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. 
1Pe 1:6  Wherein ye greatly rejoice, though now for a season, if need be, ye are in heaviness

I hope you find some peace posting here.

This community is full of fantastic people.

So sorry for your loss. Stay strong.

I’m so very sorry for your loss. Hang in there and lean on your friends, family and most of all, our Lord and Savior!

a reply to: ChiefD

ChiefD

There are no words of comfort that can give you what I wish you could have at a time like this. That comes later, at a time when you can remember without the pain of your husband's absence from your daily life.

I want you to not feel the heartbreak, but I don't want to deprive of you the healing that it is part of.

I would like to go out on a limb, and say that your husband loves you so much, that he wants you to go on and be well and happy. And someday, maybe you can feel some hope and joy about his new freedom from the travails, and the discomforts of living a physical life. He is liberated, and will meet you one day to kiss you and hold you... and to thank you for all your patience, and all your love.

You are not parted, just separated for a time.

May all your needs be met, and someday, hopefully soon... you will smile and revel in the memories of laughter, working, and living together.

If you wish it, we can be here for you, in some way. I know we will try to be part of your solution to the grief.

May you feel the peace he now knows as a good thing.

a reply to: ChiefD

I'm so sorry for your loss, ChiefD. The fact that you are staying strong and involved in your family's future generation is positive. Of course, you will never be able to forget, and that is perfectly right and natural. However, I hope the pain will subside and that those 30 years of fond memories will nurture you going forwards... until which time I'm sure you'll be together again in a better place.

Take care,
Enzo

a reply to: ChiefD
Please accept my heartfelt deepest condolences for your loss. Try to be strong for your family and please, please remember, he loved you and would want you to go on till you meet again.

a reply to: visitedbythem

Thank you for sharing your story. Sorry for your loss. I cried when I read your post too. It touched me.

a reply to: Gothmog

Thank you for sharing that. The lyrics speak to me. I appreciate it.

a reply to: Rich Z

I’m so sorry to hear about your wife’s cancer. Don’t ever give up. I’m so sorry my post upset you. I am finding that grief is really hard. I will survive this. I am very stubborn. Not that there haven’t been days when I thought I would just lay down and die. But I always get back up. When I think it cannot possibly get worse, God talks to me and lifts me up. My faith is the main thing that keeps me going at this point. Without that, I believe I would be dead. My prayers go out to you and your wife.

Thank you all so much for your condolences, prayers, and encouragement. Your comments touched me and made me feel happy. I cried a little too, but it was good. I do feel better. I know my husband wants me to be happy and wants me to have a great productive life filled with joy. I feel his presence quite a bit of the time. I’ll just keep taking things one day at a time. I’m so glad for all of you on here.

a reply to: ChiefD

Ephesians 3:14-15... For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in Heaven and on earth derives its name.

Peace be with you.

So sorry.
Prayer sent for your healing and peace and e

a reply to: ChiefD

Of course I lost it when they played Taps.

My deepest sympathy for your loss.

When I buried my parents, also a full military honors ceremony I was very stoic during the entire thing except when they played Taps. My dad hated Taps because he knew what it meant. I couldn't hold back the tears.
The other thing that really got me was when they presented the folded the flag... The rush of emotions and how our flag is used as a political pawn these days.

But let me share with you something that happened this week.

I was at a youth sporting event. The national anthem was playing and some of the kids didn't want to stand.
A young man, a young black man, stood up in front of them and yelled at them to stand. He said is this not your country? ALL our our country, did soliders not die for this? His friends all stood up. I was speechless. For your husband and my dads sacrifice, there is hope. ❤

I read your post and I shed tears for your pain and loss. Recently, many of my heroes are passing. Growing up in a family that ran a small business I was so lucky to have non-blood related aunts and uncles. These people spent time with me as a kid and stay part of my life, later my wife, and our daughter who turn 17 years old today. As a middle aged proffesional I know how hard it is to take time for others with consistency over decades. These people shaped my life and now they gone. Many were service men and women and TAPS gets me every time but the honor that is deserved is given in small but moving moment.
Your pain came through to me from your words and I hope that you take care of yourself; being kind and healthy to yourself. Your husband loved you and he would never want you suffering . Heal heal heal! Time and talking to people that can hear your words with skills that can help. People need you and you need them. Sorry to ramble but wanted to tell you that I feel your pain and I hope you know you have love from people you have never.

I hope I die before my wife does. She hopes she dies before I die. Seems like we are both being a little self centered with wanting to be the first to die because going through what you are going through ChiefD kind of sucks. I have seen so many people suffer the loss of their spouse that it is depressing to think one of us will eventually have to go through it too.

I feel bad for your Husband dying, but feel more grief for you adjusting to the loss. Some people find someone after their spouse dies, but if my wife dies first, I would never want to get attached to someone again, losing someone you love twice would be a double whammy.

I know you will eventually do ok ChiefD but it is not going to be easy or quick to get over it. I hope you can find things to do to keep you from getting to lonely or depressed. Women seem to do better with this than guys do, many husbands kick the bucket within a few years, women seem to last way longer after their husbands die.

I am glad he had a choice to end his suffering quickly. It is no fun suffering for a long time.

I kind of wondered why you seemed to not be around as much for a while. I am glad to see you are aclimating to your new life somewhat, We have been married now for thirty nine years and I really do not want to lose my wife....I get sad when a cat or goldfish dies...I even felt bad when the basement mouse...we named him Houdini because he could get out of any kind of live trap...died by falling into a trash can in the basement he could not jump high enough to get out of.

I am getting soft in my old age I guess.