Why do we wait until it's "too late"

Why do we only value life when it is lost?
Expressing the way we feel about each other when we're on the verge of destruction?

One of my coworker just died at the age of only 34 doing what she liked the most-
Chilling on a paddle board with some friends on a random river... something she casually used to do every week. Unfortunately, a couple days ago she drowned after she slipped and went unconscious in the cold water. Nothing could be done and it happened so quick... life is so fragile when you think about it.

Now, the reason I'm making this thread is because I believe that when somebody passes away they most likely want to make their death linked to a teaching of some sort. So it doesn't go to waste especially at that age, right?
As of now, looking at her facebook profile reveals an interesting statement about our reality and the way we humans interact with each other. Suddenly, ppl are talking to her from all sides on social media like she was still alive, sharing their love and affection towards her. The thing is...

I can't help but find it super f-cking weird. And it got me to realize that we go on about our life and never stop and at least try to consider and realize the importance of the people around us that we love. We take them for granted and even go as far as judge them, hate them and see only the bad things in them. But then, something like this happen and suddenly we open our eyes... and it's "too late".

Maybe we could start showing and expressing the way we feel about people while they are alive instead of waiting until they go in the other realm? I feel like that is what my coworker is trying to remind us... cherish the people you love while you still can.

a reply to: St0rD

I know what you're saying. What is the need to gush love after the person is gone? Why we don't consider doing that while the person's alive?

I'm always surprised by the independent force of grief. It comes on its own regardless of anything we are aware of.
Death is a step thru the Looking Glass for both those that pass and those staying. Both are pulled into a different dimension by the death.

We might not be Plato or Van Gogh but the affect and affection is our legacy of our life lived.

a reply to: St0rD

It's because we humans are habitual creatures. We adapt quick in the sense that we take things and people for granted. Life is moving faster each day, with all the technology and distractions.

For some of those FB posters, it sure was a sort of coping with the news. A deceased family member was member on this board. To this day I sometimes play with the thought, when I stumble over his posts and think I may have something to add, to just post it to him.

But I backed off every time because of what you wrote out as being "weird". It's not weird but other think it would be, so I did not do it. Every time that was the reason, I thought, that's super weird for the others so I didn't do it.

One day I will, probably next time.. So in a sense, your post and text about it being weird and me typing an answer reflecting about it, actually gave me more confidence to do the above and not back up next time. Because internally, I don't really think it's weird.

originally posted by: St0rD
Why do we only value life when it is lost?
Expressing the way we feel about each other when we're on the verge of destruction?

One of my coworker just died at the age of only 34 doing what she liked the most-
Chilling on a paddle board with some friends on a random river... something she casually used to do every week. Unfortunately, a couple days ago she drowned after she slipped and went unconscious in the cold water. Nothing could be done and it happened so quick... life is so fragile when you think about it.

Now, the reason I'm making this thread is because I believe that when somebody passes away they most likely want to make their death linked to a teaching of some sort. So it doesn't go to waste especially at that age, right?
As of now, looking at her facebook profile reveals an interesting statement about our reality and the way we humans interact with each other. Suddenly, ppl are talking to her from all sides on social media like she was still alive, sharing their love and affection towards her. The thing is...

I can't help but find it super f-cking weird. And it got me to realize that we go on about our life and never stop and at least try to consider and realize the importance of the people around us that we love. We take them for granted and even go as far as judge them, hate them and see only the bad things in them. But then, something like this happen and suddenly we open our eyes... and it's "too late".

Maybe we could start showing and expressing the way we feel about people while they are alive instead of waiting until they go in the other realm? I feel like that is what my coworker is trying to remind us... cherish the people you love while you still can.

Great points in your thread! So often, I read the news and see suicides. So many of the people who sadly do this have stated that they are so lonely - or rather feel alone in their troubles. But then when they are gone...people come out of the woodwork to praise them (i.e. movie stars or musicians for example).

Even with CV for the last two years, so very many people were isolated and depressed and struggled with being inside alone all the time. I feel like for all the social media connections we have, it is no substitute for actually being with or hanging out with another person in real life and doing something fun. I often wonder if people will get back to talking in person more if we did have a grid-down situation or economic collapse. Not sure though.

a reply to: TruthJava

Yeah you're making sense mate.

I would add that it is exactly where they want us to be. Divided, isolated and depressed. I'm not even sure I know one person around me that's truly happy. Everybody is on pills or something...

Not everybody takes the moments shared with loved ones and friends for granted. I have been aware since I turned 18 that life is fleeting, and death can come in the most unexpected ways, at the most unexpected time. I am always fully aware that this may be the last time I see someone, and do my best to make it a happy, memorable time.

That makes me seem like the weird one, to most people.

P.S. I'm sorry for the loss of your friend.

a reply to: St0rD

I had a childhood friend die recently.

Nobody gave a turd while he spiralled out of control on drugs, then he dies and the facebook crowd can't wait to share their heartbreak.

True grief is silent.

I agree and have been doing it.
Every morning, when the Hubby leaves for work, or me, we kiss, and tell each other we love them. Was surprised when talking about this in real life, how many people don't do it.
I also tell my close friends I love them, when ending phone conversations. A few thought it was weird at first, but when I explained that I just wanted them to know how important they are to me, and that I consider them family, now it is said even before I do.

And I am a hugger, which is good for everyone.

If your a robot not much matters, unless your bender from Futurama then your sad when you cant get anymore alcohol.

When my time comes i'd hope people make jokes about Beavis and Butthead remembering how much i liked that show. Also being fun not uptight not pretentious and alternative, how people used to be. That is what i'd want people to do rather than moping about being sad.