The Art of Handshake

How many people are familiar with the subconscious messages we send to others with our body language? It may mean facing them fully when talking to them, or perhaps standing a bit sideways when uncomfortable or wanting to leave and having your feet point away from them. It may mean asserting confidence or dominance by keeping your hands on your hips as opposed to having them crossed, to guard your weak and exposed midsection, or in your pockets when bored or uncomfortable.

The same thing applies to handshakes and how we interact with our hands. During a handshake one may show confidence and dominance, submission or equality. Some will pay attention to how they shake hands or look at their hands after reading this, but after a while they will go back to their natural handshake, not paying attention and doing it subconsciously.

The position of the palm during a handshake subconsciously tells those we are interacting with what our status or what our level of confidence is, right at the beginning of the meeting. That is why there are classes on proper business handshakes. For those that are keen on this language and are apt at watching for other clues, it can make or break a meeting or a deal.

In the game of handshakes, it is all about communicating dominance, equality, or submission. In a meeting of equals, you would expect a handshake with palms perfectly perpendicular to the floor. In life, you may find that your boss or an aggressive neighbor may employ a “palm-down” approach in an attempt to get that “upper hand” over you. Shake hands with a nervous child, and you’re likely to be approached palm-up.

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A study of 400 senior management executives (90% men) revealed that not only did almost all of the managers initiate the handshake, 90% of the men and 30% of the women also used the dominant handshake position. Power and control issues are generally less important to women, which probably accounts for why only one in three women attempted the upper hand ritual. Some women it was found will give men a soft handshake in some social contexts to imply submissiveness. This is a way of highlighting their femininity or implying that domination of her may be possible. In a business context, however, this approach can be disastrous for a woman because men will give attention to her feminine qualities and not take her seriously. Women who display high femininity in business meetings are not taken seriously by other business women or men, despite the fact that it's now fashionable or politically correct to say everyone is the same. This doesn't mean a woman in business needs to act in a masculine way; she simply needs to avoid signals of femaleness such as soft handshakes, short skirts and high heels if she wants equal credibility.

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Now, let's move onto why this topic came up in the first place. Our president continually tries to exert dominance, plays the role of an unflinching leader but things don't always go that way during the meeting with the foreign dignitaries. When he meets with Putin he always starts a scandal and ends up coming out like a puppy. Kim Jong-Un outplays him and does as he pleases, continuing building whatever he wants. Can some of this be because he is really a timid man, full of complexes and his bullying and aggression is meant to mask the softer, less confident inside?

Take a look at how our president shakes hands MOST of the time. Not all the time, and a search will find some handshakes of him in the dominant role, but you'll have to actually look for them. They're harder to find.










Interestingly enough, when looking for photos of him shaking hands with Obama or HRC, he felt as their equal and shook hands that way most of the time:





Interesting stuff, huh? Read those two article for more information on body language, but here is another interesting tidbit before I go. Test your family and friends to see how masculine or feminine they are. When you ask someone to look at their nails, such as tricking them into looking: "Wow, what's that under your nail?!" or "Look how long your nails are!", watch for how they look at their own nails.

A male usually, or a dominant and confident female, will make a claw and look at his or her nails that way:


While a female or an effeminate male will look at their nails top down:

a reply to: Duderino

Your assertion that he's timid with foreign leaders only works if you believe he did these unintentionally.

He clearly knows what he's doing. And I'm 100% sure of it.

I myself, almost always greet people with my palms up, not because I'm timid, but because I want to invite them in and seem non-threatning. This instantly creates a level of comfort and makes you seem more trustworthy. This is especially true if you know you're trying to negotiate with them, and Trump knows this all too well.

But as you can see, he doesn't care to do that with Obama or Hillary, for obvious reasons.


But.. Orange Man a Pansy?


#TheMoreYouKnow

originally posted by: knowledgehunter0986
a reply to: Duderino



But.. Orange Man a Pansy?

To truely understand the trump psychology, this book is very enlightening.

www.amazon.com...=sspa_dk_detail_4?psc=1

Shortly after the election Jesse waters said I’ve shaken trumps hand on several occasions “it hurts”.

Washington is going to live in fear of that handshake . 😆

Back on topic .

There’s two other things I’d like to point out.

Always make eye contact it can go further to exhibiting dominance than a handshake.

If they break eye contact you’ve won.

It also gives you a chance to read the person’s character .

Another thing you can do with handshakes is give a weak one on purpose especially when negotiating business .

It makes people think they have dominance and they will underestimate you . ( playing dumb )

Then when the moment arises you can cut them down to size.

Trump uses all three tactics and I think playing dumb is his favorite .

a reply to: Duderino

A picture is but a moment, and does not suffice to accurately describe Trump’s handshake technique, which often come with a pull and a twist (the Trump pump). These movements, and others such as the strength of grip, the approach of the hand, or who extends their hand first, are lacking from your analysis. Any video refutes the idea that Trump rarely makes a dominant handshake.

a reply to: olaru12

I'm sure there is some great insight in there, but I'd take anything that is clearly meant to be a hit-piece with a grain of salt. From the NYT no less.

I'm sure Trump is or has been a scumbag, there's no debating that, but he's far from timid or afraid. This much I know for sure.

In fact, he's quite the stable-genius if you ask me.

a reply to: Duderino

Looking at the photo of Trump and Pelosi... the whole photo, not just the hands, I don't see how anyone could view Trump as being submissive.
Pelosi looks like she is in fear of her life.

Shame you chose to make this topic into just another standard TDS "Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…" thread, because handshakes are interesting.


I hate those hand-crushing shakes...it always tells me that the person doing it are very insecure and intimidated by me.

a reply to: Duderino

Grasping at straws, as usual.
Trump plays the Left like a fiddle.

Could you imagine how great America could be if we put the same amount of energy into fighting poverty/hunger/mental illness/etc. as we do stuff like this.

It almost feels like we are going backwards as a society the more we obsess over stuff like how the president shakes a hand or drinks water. But maybe it's just me and this is the new norm. To focus on things that have no relevance to your life or how you live it meanwhile ignoring the things that do.
*Shrug*

He must've used his power handshake to get the extra scoop of ice cream I'm assuming.

a reply to: knowledgehunter0986

I'm sure Trump is or has been a scumbag, there's no debating that, but he's far from timid or afraid. This much I know for sure.

I think trump is just overcompensating for his insecurities. That's why he feels the need to constantly brag and protect his fragile ego.

www.psychologytoday.com...

And even a halfassed poker player can read trump like a book.

www.pokerjunkie.com...

a reply to: JAY1980

Sometimes I feel like the internet was a mistake.

a reply to: IAMTAT

Not always lots of trades people have naturally strong grip.

a reply to: Duderino

Actually, Google is your friend. Search "Trump handshake" and notice that when he's on the right hand side, he's usually a bottom shaker, when he's on the left side, he's a top or side shaker. Also notice, when he's successfully negotiated an international deal or had a diplomatic agreement with another leader, and the handshake is with him on the right, he "captures" the other's hand with his left hand on top of the overall handshake.

The individual on the left generally turns their body more than the individual on the right, especially when both are seated, and that motion naturally puts the left's hand in a more palm-downward position.

This isn't rocket science.

ETA; The Kim Jong and Trudeau photos literally look like Trump is taking the hand of a woman the way men used to "shake" women's hands. It's clear he's not submitting to them, rather, he looks like he sees them as bitches.

originally posted by: strongfp
a reply to: IAMTAT

Not always lots of trades people have naturally strong grip.

I was talking about that unnessesary squeeze at the end...a sure sign the person is trying to convince YOU they are self-confident and not intimidated.

You know the one.

a reply to: olaru12

I’m not so sure .

This article was written in 2015 and even though it was an anti-trump article it hit the nail on the head .

5. Use misdirection.

Trump is loud, brash, and seems to get riled up fairly easily. I’m pretty sure it’s nothing but a carefully orchestrated act. In fact, watching Trump, I’m reminded of watching videos of con artists and mentalists such as Apollo Robbins.

Takeaway: The ability to control what people focus on puts you in a position of immense power. You can throw people off their game, send them on wild goose chases or rob them blind. In the case of Trump, you can lead your opponents and the media around by their noses while winning over the masses.

Five psychological tactics Donald Trump has mastered

a reply to: olaru12



To date, he's "backed it up" far more often than not, though.

The Irony is you know OP got a weak ass grip.

Come to Texas, learn to shake a hand.





Keep that limp # to yaself.