The Nature of Suffering

Over the last year some of my addictions have been producing conditions that I have now gone through for the third time.

To be precise, my stomach and digestive tract is completely and utterly off. What caused it? I smoke medical cannabis and, contrary to the popular representation of cannabis as harmless, there is a fairly common - and under-reported - condition termed "cannabinoid hyper-emesis syndrome". Recent studies indicate that as many 2.75 million cannabis smokers in the U.S. may deal with it.

This is not me merely waxing about how horrible a condtiion like this is - and it is pretty bad. But rather, I want to discuss how feelings are formed, and how feelings correlate with ideas, concepts, or narratives.

When I feel this way, thoughts I hadn't known for months or years return with a vengeance. First, my body starts it: the body always carries the symbolic meanings of how your behavior in relation to the world 'operates'. We all know this, but lets explore the hell that this condition puts me through.

Sweating, nausea, and a full-body 'jitteriness' floods my experience. Why does the stomach hold such a powerful control on our perceptions? In my weakness, my brain is not getting any energy to regulate my stomach. My feeling states are a literal representation of my body-situation. Hence, my feeling states represent the effort of my body to 'fix' whatever is happening in my neuroendocrine system vis-a-vis the medication I'm taking.

The logic is simple: body wants something; mind isn't doing it; the consequence is that the body projects the meaning of its situation into the mind. Mind is now 'frozen' in the state being created by the feeling-body. It's perceptions are perceptions of a horrible discomfort.

Yet don't we think? Anyone with an education in theology or metaphysics is going to experience a horrible backlash from an experience like this. New percepts could arise that 'feed' directly on this state-of-body. Nihilistic or meaningless impressions of existence - as a total farce, for instance - can creep up if the person happens to be particularly educated. Being exposed to Nietzsche, for example, and having his words/perceptions in your mind, can emerge in a situation like this. "Nietzsche is right" the mind might say. But isn't that melodramatic? Isn't the perceptual/cognitive state an illusion created by the feelings? And don't we need to take a third person perspective on our self-functioning in a larger ecological environment to properly - and equitably - capture the "reality" of what we are?

So, the thoughts come and go. If a wave of nausea comes, the anxiety/discomfort returns, and a thought can arise. On the other hand - this being the tricky nature of the mind/body connection - if I'm tempted to think something of an existential nature - BOOM! - the stomach feels sensitive/agitated again, as if the amount of energy required for such affective perception "sucks energy" from the stomach, and in the process, creates this 'backlash' experience. Mental work and bodily weakness do not seem to go together.

So, ultimately, I am curious as to how people often understand their experiences. For instance, I am probably susceptible to this condition because of a history of PTSD. The brain composes/synthesizes its own opiates in the periaqueductal gray. Endorphins, dynorphins, and cannabinoids, are examples of opioids produced/synthesized in this brain region. Cannabinoids are found throughout the midbrain and the enteric nervous system - the gut - and so is theorized to be a fundamental ingredient in the stomach-mind connection. Endorphins on the other hand are "relaxing" molecules. Attachment in early life sets the brains baseline for endorphin regulation, so that, if early-life isn't filled with caring and supportive caregiving, than the endorphins will be rather low, and the HPA axis - the stress molecules, overly high. This produces a "tension" throughout the system - in brain, endocrine/torso, and musculature.

I had a difficult early life; difficult birth, but more relevantly, my moms father suffered a major stroke when I was 8 months and her grandma died right after. This put her in a depression which, of course, stimulates/fosters aggression against others. In this way, my endorphin system was 'under-regulated'. So the endorphin/cannabinoid connection appears to be: endorphins allow relaxation for social connection, whereas cannabinoids regulate the mind-body connection. Both of them arise out of the same brain site, so it stands to reason that lower endorphins - i.e. PTSD - can create/make the stomach more vulnerable to dysregulation.

Such scientifiic perpectives pay attention to how "metaphysical thinking" is always fed through the feeling body. If the body is feeling negative and irritable, it is almost inevitable that whatever you think will be a projection of that condition. At most, if you feel bad, you can simply remind yourself that "under these circumstances thinking isn't useful/valid".

a reply to: Astrocyte

All your problems come from you thinking too much.

originally posted by: dfnj2015
a reply to: Astrocyte

All your problems come from you thinking too much.

I'm thinking you are correct. Also, being high all the time isn't helping either.

a reply to: schuyler

a reply to: Astrocyte

Hey man. Sorry that your body is kicking-up a storm.

How does your stomach feel, when not thinking? (Sleeping, laughing with trusted ones, stroking a pet, or immersed in other kinds of experiences, like art, or such?)

Have you ever had a braincation?

Buddha said that desire leads to suffering.

I think he might have been onto something.

a reply to: Astrocyte

Go get some exercise or a gym and release those endorphins. Don't have to go all out, just till it burns.

a reply to: Astrocyte

The stomach is the second brain. And, I also think you are overthinking things. I also think you are prone to stress/anxiety/worry. Keep in mind that the mind will create emotions and then bodily responses. The key is to not let your mind get too far ahead of itself and then overthink things.

Bone broth (the real stuff, not some can from the supermarket) and mushroom broth are vital for intestinal issues and so good for you in every way.

I think you have hit on a key element of your situation as to why thoughts lead to physical manifestations - it's really key to understanding why you are who you are, why things occur, but now you have to learn how to gain control over your thoughts and find healing and peace with the past, the ptsd and be free of emotional sabotage from your own body.

Check this out:
The Second Brain: A Groundbreaking New Understanding of Nervous Disorders of the Stomach and Intestine books.google.ca...

a reply to: Astrocyte

If I think back on it, the three times I was sick enough to wish annihilation did involve the stomach and intestines; frequent vomiting and diarrhea. All metaphysics either ended up on the ground or down the toilet.

Whereas other severe, albeit not GI tract related illnesses, like measles, mumps, chicken pox, and rubella did not interfere with metaphysical seeing; sometimes described as hallucinations.

I did suffer from 5 months of delirium 6 years ago. Underlying anemia and hypoxia; severe allergic reaction, treated with massive steroids; resulting in complete sleep disruption. Higher thinking just fine. Not.

a reply to: Astrocyte

Is it possible to live without explanation?

a reply to: Astrocyte

Everything in moderation, keeps coming to my mind.

“I want to make asceticism natural once again: in place of the aim of denial, the aim of strengthening; a gymnastics of the will; abstinence and periods of fasting of all kinds, in the most spiritual realm, too.” (On the Genealogy of Morality, Nietzsche scribbled the following words in one of his notebooks.)

“The means by which Julius Caesar defended himself against sickliness and headaches: tremendous marches, the most frugal way of life, uninterrupted sojourn in the open air, continuous exertion—these are, in general, the universal rules of preservation and protection against the extreme vulnerability of that subtle machine, working under the highest pressure, which we call genius.” — Nietzsche, Twilight of the Idols

Why not try to abstain, at least for 12 hours, just to see if you are able to get a glimpse of the real you again?

Also, try drinking camomile tea, it may soothe the lining of your stomach; it is from the daisy family and so please research it first to ensure you understand its properties and don't drink too much of it, nor for prolonged periods. I prepare for myself half camomile/half milkweed herbs for a total organ cleansing, but I use it very sparingly - moreso as a tonic now and again. Did it work? Well because I believe it will work, it did work and immediately; placebo effect or mind over matter?

Good luck and I hope you can find other ways to make yourself feel healthy and whole without medical marijuana. It is something to think about. It is something to be mindful about.

“The secret to physical and mental health is to not cry over the past, worry about the future or anticípate problems. Instead, live in the present with wisdom and responsibility.” -Buddha-

Would eating medical mj also cause the stomach problem?
Or is it just smoking it?

Is there thc in the medical mj?

If snow makes you miserable, move farther south.

^^^^
I think this advice applies to your situation, because everything you've been doing to cope with your issues thus far is not working. You should earnestly try to go to a 'different place'--not necessarily a different physical place.

Try making some major changes in your life. Start with eating healthy foods and getting plenty of exercise. The brain can actually take control of many physiological issues and improve health; it's been proven that a hospital patient with a hopeful, positive attitude will do better than a patient that is pessimistic and hopeless.

It will not be easy. Get through ~20 days of this new approach (be honest with yourself about it) and see if you realize any positive changes yo your situation.

Mojo

a reply to: dfnj2015

And the probable metaphysical consequences coming your way come from not wanting to think.

Do you think your motivations "not to think" were born out of the blue? Or from your own suffering?

If you refuse to know your suffering, you can never know how or why you behave the way you do. You spread your own damage outwards as a consequence.

The point is, not wanting to know means not wanting to take responsibility for the projections that cause you to harm others.

It might seem like a catch-22, but as Kierkagaard said, there's no avoiding anxiety.

You may think death is the end; but it probably isn't. Dissociation of the way you're affected and affect Others is too significant a reality not to pay attention to.

You're on the wrong side of history.

a reply to: Blue Shift

So why are you posting here? Did a desire/motivation not precede your typing?

a reply to: pthena

Thanks for daring to think about what I wrote.

Other people confuse their response to this thread for something other than their own needs (i.e. projection).

a reply to: Itisnowagain


I know dissociation feels good; but I refuse to give in to the evilness that such self-absorbed thinking creates for other humans.

Of course, you need to be balanced. I do 'use' the now, but not in the desperate sort of ways that you or others seem to recommend. You, in my opinion, are being a deeply irresponsible person for failing to recognize how necessary it is (if you cared about education you would understand this) for you to know yourself, and to apply this information to better regulate yourself.

Do you know what life - what enlivening feelings feel like? In order for life to go properly for humans, we need to use our knowledge/mind to know things.

I'm sure/suspect that the post-life experience will make known to those who avoid this path-of-reparation why and what they have been trying to avoid. Have you cried? Have you mourned your losses? If you know the importance of this - knowledge being paramount here - than you will have done something important for your bodily system: re-setting it by allowing the unresolved emotions created from attachment dynamics to flow into the left brain (through speech), and out into the body (right brain).

Aye. Capitalism creates people in its own image. Fun, fun, fun. Not thinking/reflecting lets you feel calm again, but you cannot be responsible at all to the world/people/beings around you if you refuse to reflect on the meaning of your behaviors.

a reply to: InTheLight

Thanks for all the advice.

I've just quit it all together. I've dealt with this syndrome too many times and frankly it is exhausting my entire nervous system/endocrine system; I am experiencing hair-loss as well - and this is just too much! I like my hair!

originally posted by: Astrocyte
a reply to: Itisnowagain
I do 'use' the now, but not in the desperate sort of ways that you or others seem to recommend.

That's hilarious.....
'Now" is another word for 'what IS happening'......
How can what is happening be used?
And by what?

Life is happening...... as it is..... there isn't any thing separate that can use it.

originally posted by: Astrocyte
a reply to: InTheLight

Thanks for all the advice.

I've just quit it all together. I've dealt with this syndrome too many times and frankly it is exhausting my entire nervous system/endocrine system; I am experiencing hair-loss as well - and this is just too much! I like my hair!

Yes, when it starts to get really personal, like one's beautiful flowing locks falling out, then it is time to change; I'm not kidding.